Page 165 of A Vow of Embers

Under the confusion of our arrival, I pulled Suri away and whispered to her, “Is the eye of the goddess in the fountain?”

Suri crossed the courtyard and knelt next to it. She closed her eyes and then looked up at me. She shook her head but had a strange expression. When she returned to me, I asked, “Was it there?”

No.

Then why had she made that face? “Did you feel anything else? Like something else is there?”

Yes.

What was in the fountain?

Maia was laughing with Ahyana and I resolved to get my mentor alone and ask her questions. I didn’t think she would lie to me. I knew she kept things from us, most likely because the high priestess had set things up that way, but Maia wasn’t dishonest. I hoped she would tell me the truth.

Or as much of the truth as she knew.

I looked around for Theano and was glad when I didn’t see her. She was always easy to spot in a crowd with that veil over her face. I remembered that she, Daphne, and Maia had been there when I’d gotten into the temple. Was she waiting in there for the soon-to-be acolytes?

And was the statue of the goddess being protected right now? If there wasn’t a guard, I might be able to sneak down there and speak to her. It had been so long—maybe I would get the guidance Io had suggested I ask for. I went up the outside steps, quickly glanced inside, and saw a guard at the top of the stairs. I wouldn’t be able to go in.

Io ran over to me. “The first racer is nearly here! Come and see!”

She didn’t seem to remember that this hadn’t been a good experience for me, as it had been for her. “What happens when the Ilionian maidens race?”

“There are obstacles set up for them to overcome because they’ll know the labyrinth. And then people wear masks and symbolically pretend like they’re going to ...” Her voice trailed off as she seemed to realize who she was speaking to. “I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for. I wanted to know how it was different.” And those memories were much easier to deal with now that I knew Quynh was alive.

Alive and in love with Thrax.

I didn’t want to think about that right now. Instead I looked around and saw how easily my adelphia fit back in. Everyone wanted to speak to them, as if they’d never been gone. I had always felt on the outside of things here, and now it was even worse, given who I was and that I was married. I felt totally alone.

Maia came over to stand with me. “Is it strange being back?” she asked.

“I thought I would feel like it used to but everything has changed.” It wasn’t what I had wanted. I had hoped it would be like stepping back in time, to the people that my adelphia and I used to be.

“That’s why we have to enjoy what we have while we have it—tomorrow everything could be opposite to what it is now. Life is about change. It’s what the goddess intends. We go through different seasons and grow into something new. Like how a tiny acorn becomes a mighty oak. That acorn has to be pushed down deep in the darkness, exposed to the elements, to try and root itself and then to burst out in an attempt to become something new. Our experiences change us. As do the people we meet. We are all heading toward who we are meant to become. We will grow with you for as long as the goddess permits and someday we may grow apart. But that’s her will.”

“I don’t like it.”

She smiled. “Nobody does. Not even the acorn.”

This was my chance to question her about some of the things I had learned. I started to ask about the fountain water, but someone called out, “Here they come!”

People from the neighborhood lined the streets, cheering for the young women as they ran.

The first girl crossed the archway, running across the courtyard and entering the temple’s open doors so that she had officially crossed the threshold. She immediately came back out and, to my surprise, threw her arms around Maia.

“Aunt Maia!”

Maia hugged the girl tightly. “What are you doing? You shouldn’t be here yet!”

“I couldn’t wait any longer to join you!” She stepped back from Maia. “Please don’t tell them. Let me stay.”

It was only then that Maia seemed to remember that I was standing next to her. “Lia, this is my favorite niece, Ianessa. She is the daughterof my oldest brother and is only sixteen years old, so not yet old enough to enter the tribute race.”

“I won’t say anything.” If Ianessa wanted to be here, that was her business.

“Don’t make me leave,” Ianessa pleaded with her aunt. “I can’t wait another two years. The only way they’ll know is if you say something.”