Page 51 of When Ben Loved Jace (He Loved Him #2)

The story is about two friends, one who is a serial matchmaker, the other—played by yours truly—her perpetual project.

The clever twist is that my theme remains mostly consistent throughout the production.

It’s the other singers—my love interests—who change the anthem through their accompaniment.

So on a really bad date, the sound is discordant.

Or on another where we get into an argument, the tempo picks up furiously.

Brian switches to a minor key to bring the mood down when I’m paired with someone who is still heartbroken from the last guy.

He saves the best for the end of the play.

My character, frustrated by being pressured into so many dates, confronts his best friend.

The big reveal is that she’s so fond of him that she can’t stand to see him remain single.

He, in turn, fails to be impressed by anyone because they never compare to her.

So we finally sing a duet together, and while it has the potential to be beautiful, I’ve been struggling with pulling it off .

Regardless, working on the production has been a pleasure.

I like having a creative outlet. Before casting was settled, Allison stopped by on occasion, playing opposite me in many of the roles.

I’m glad she’s not the other lead though.

A story about two best friends who are secretly in love doesn’t exactly resonate with us.

Especially when she’s so crazy about Brian.

He treats Allison well, always listening attentively when she speaks and never treating her as anything but his top priority, no matter how busy he might be.

He’s just as affectionate with her as he is respectful.

I was kidding when I told her to marry him, but I honestly wouldn’t mind.

I really really like Brian. Which sucks, because I’m going to have to burn his theater down.

Or maybe I’ll just murder him to avoid hurting anyone else.

Although that would break Allison’s heart.

Is it too late to get into a horrific car accident on my way to opening night?

I mean, I’ve already arrived, but if I make an excuse, like needing to pick up dry cleaning in the middle of the night and ram my car into the nearest brick wall…

“You doing all right?” Brian asks, placing a hand on my shoulder.

“I’m fine!” I snarl in return.

Like someone realizing the dog they were petting might be rabid, he carefully withdraws his hand. “Because it’s completely normal to have pre-show jitters. We could do some breathing exercises together.”

“Do you have a paper bag on you?” I respond. “I think I’m about to hyperventilate. Does that count as a breathing exercise? Ha ha ha! Um… I have to go pick up my dry cleaning.”

Brian glances around uneasily. “Maybe we should get Allison back here.”

“YES! She knows the part. We can dress her up like me. Why can’t it be a lesbian love story? That’s so much better.”

“Five minutes,” the stage manager says when walking past us.

“I never even considered the idea,” Brian says, his face creasing. “Does the world really need another heterosexual love story? Written by a white man no less.” His eyes widen as he considers me. “And look who I cast as the lead!”

“Well I am gay,” I remind him.

“And being forced to play a straight man. ”

“I wouldn’t say forced.”

Brian shakes his head. “Are you kidding? I call all the shots around here. I literally own the theater. Oh god… I’ve become a gatekeeper, haven’t I?

I can already imagine the headlines.” He grabs me by the shoulders.

“Social media is going to have a field day with this. I’m gonna get canceled! We have to pull the plug!”

“We can’t! Not at the literal last minute!”

“What if it’s a disaster?”

“We’ll get through it.”

He blinks. Then he throws his arms around me. “You’re right. Thanks, Ben.”

“You’re welcome,” I reply when pulling away. “Keep it together. I have to go take my spot.”

I glance back at him after having done so, because I’m not nearly as nervous now.

I’d give the man credit for being a master manipulator, but he’s currently dabbing the sweat off his brow while gulping down air.

I won’t fail him. Nothing comes as naturally to me as singing.

Although that difficult final duet… I’m still not sure I can stick the landing.

Which worries me, because if I don’t it will sound like just another date.

The audience needs to be convinced that two soulmates have finally found each other.

And speaking of spectators, stupid me upped the pressure by inviting everyone I know.

That seemed like a good idea at the time.

I wanted them to be here for my big debut.

In retrospect, I should have invited them to closing night, when I would have already worked out the kinks.

Ah well. At the very least, they’ll be obligated to pity-clap. I’ll take that over deafening silence.

It's time! The worst-case scenario suddenly becomes not performing at all. That motivates me to get out there and sing, which takes all my focus. There’s not any left for nerves.

I do feel a little breathless, but I manage to push through.

I don’t really get a break. As one of the two leads, I’m basically always on stage.

A smaller role would have made more sense, considering my lack of experience, but then I’ve always been the type to jump in head first. I’m actually buzzing by the time we make it to the intermission.

I’d rather just keep going and ride the wave of adrenaline. Especially when I hear applause.

“You did great!” Brian says, meeting me in the wings. “Outstanding, in fact!”

“Thanks!” My grin fades when he rushes off to talk to the other players.

I don’t like having time to worry. I concentrate on rehydrating and the costume change, but a lot has to happen during a dinner theater intermission.

That’s when people get their food and begin to eat.

The wait goes on longer than I like. After checking in with the rest of the cast, I move to the curtain so I can covertly peer out at the audience.

My family and friends take up two tables, front and center.

My parents are seated at one with Allison and her father.

Jace and Adrien share the other with Greg and Michelle.

They all seem happy as they stuff their faces.

Nobody is grimacing or exchanging looks of concern.

I just have to make it through the second half… And that intimidating ending!

I turn around to face the darkened set, which resembles a town square, providing different places for the dates to take place.

An outdoor café, a park, a street corner where musicians play…

I simply need to lose myself in this world and let myself fall in love.

That should be easy. Of course it would help if my co-star was handsome instead of pretty.

“Places everyone!”

Another shot of adrenaline courses through my body.

Just what I needed! I’m back on, dancing with a disastrous date on the street corner and trying to buy the affection of another at a store front.

After a few more attempts, I meet my best friend at the fountain, shaking my head when she mentions all the prospects that still remain.

She pleads with me not to give up. I demand an explanation.

The truth finally comes out. Our confessions are meant to be layered.

Once she begins, I’ll interject with my own, she’ll respond, and so forth, but I’m so outclassed.

Her voice is stunning! Maybe that has been the issue all along.

She’s better than me. More experienced too.

And because of her skill level, I can actually believe that she really does love me. I have to match that somehow.

My attention darts nervously to the audience behind her, the artificial sunlight making the front row glow, and I see Jace.

My husband. The one person who, more than anyone else, I don’t want to disappoint.

I can live with snarky comments from Adrien or hollow praise from the others, but I love him and—

That’s all I need.

The confession explodes out of me. I’m singing to him .

He might as well be with me on stage. So that’s what I imagine.

Jace opens his mouth, singing back to me, our voices weaving together into a beautiful crescendo that reaches impossible heights but doesn’t quit there.

I don’t want it to stop. Ever. The thundering applause is heartbreaking instead of soothing.

The only salve on my soul is when we turn to the audience to bow and I see him there, smiling at me.

Jace will be with me every night from now on, during each performance, because I’ve found the key.

I can do anything for him. No matter how daunting. His love makes me strong.