Page 33 of When Ben Loved Jace (He Loved Him #2)

My eyes are burning, but I don’t care. My whole damn head could catch fire and I wouldn’t move from this chair, because I’m so close!

I’ve finally got the middle of my thesis smoothed out.

With that revision in place, I only need to carry some of those new ideas through to the conclusion, which is proving more difficult than expected.

The finish line is in sight. Almost there. I can do this!

Allison pads into the kitchen while rubbing her eyes.

“You’re still up?” I ask in surprise.

“No, hon,” she replies. “I just slept for eight hours straight. You’re still up. And exactly where I left you.”

I knew it was late. I just didn’t realize that it was so early!

“I’ll make some coffee,” Allison says with a yawn.

I lose myself in my work again, only pausing when she sets a mug of steaming hot caffeine next to my laptop before plopping down on the other side of the table.

“Aren’t you done yet?”

“Almost,” I say. “I just need another day.”

“How much longer do you have?”

“Another day,” I reply with a grimace.

“You’ve got this,” she assures me. “Nobody expects perfection.”

“That’s true, but if someone files a deadline extension and they hand in something that’s still sloppy, despite the extra time…”

“I see your point,” she says, “but maybe you should get a little shut-eye before you run the final stretch. It’s not like you have anything else to do today.”

“That’s true.” The only exception is— “Samson!” I hiss suddenly. “Was I over there yesterday?”

“How should I know?”

“Do you remember me leaving?”

Allison thinks about it and shrugs. “I wasn’t here the whole day, but whenever I was, you were sitting there poking away at that keyboard.”

I forgot to feed him. I’m almost sure of it now. I stand up, my body stiff, and rush around the apartment to collect my things. Before I go, I take a few swigs of the coffee.

Allison watches this with a raised eyebrow.

“Want me to give you a ride?”

“No. That’s okay.” I shut my laptop and tuck it under an arm. “I’ll work from there today.”

“Drive safe!”

I barely hear her on my way out the door.

Maybe it’s the morning light, but I get a second wind on my way over.

I’ll make sure Samson is taken care of, hunker down with him, and get this thing done!

After that, it’s graduation and a tour of the country with Jace.

That’s a great big dangling prize. I couldn’t be more motivated!

I park on the street and race to the trailer.

I almost miss the note taped to the door.

I’m hoping it’s from Adrien, explaining that he filled in for me yesterday.

He always keeps a close eye on my comings and goings.

First things first. I let myself in and feed Samson, who complains loudly while I’m opening a can of food.

This whole situation would be easier if Jace let him eat dry kibble, since I could fill a bowl or two on busy days.

“Can’t you hunt your own food?” I retort. “You’ve got the lay of the land now.”

One of the trailer windows is always left cracked open, so Samson can spend time outdoors. But I suppose bugs and birds don’t come drenched in gravy. I watch Samson eat ravenously while feeling guilty, because I don’t see any sign that Adrien fed him. I check the note to be sure.

Hey Jace!

You said to stop by if I was ever in town. Sorry I didn’t call first, like you asked me to. I was hoping to surprise you. I’m still in town for a few days, if you’d like a rerun of what we did in your hotel room. That was an incredible night. I swear I’m still a little sore. LOL Give me a call!

Hugs and kisses - Aaron

My blood pressure shoots through the roof, especially when I reread the note.

Hotel room… Incredible night… Hugs and kisses…

Who the fuck is Aaron? I force myself to take a deep breath.

This must be some guy Jace was involved with before he met me.

But if so, how would Aaron know where to find the trailer?

We were already together when Jace moved here.

Maybe he stayed in contact with someone named Aaron that he has a history with.

Even though I’ve never heard of him, it’s possible.

And perhaps Aaron didn’t realize that Jace is in a committed relationship now, acting on an invitation to stop by as a friend that he misconstrued.

Sorry I didn’t call first, like you asked me to.

I clench my jaw, my eyes darting down to that name again. Aaron. He left his number under the signature. I’m tempted to call it and find out what the hell is going on!

A noise outside the trailer distracts me. The garage door is going up. Adrien is probably on his way to work. I rush outside and wave him down. He stops and lowers the driver-side window. “What’s the note say?” he asks without prompting. I’ve got it clenched in my hand.

“Did you see who left it?”

Adrien nods. “A cute little Asian twink knocked on my door yesterday, wanting to know where Jace was.”

“What did he want?”

“I just told you.” Adrien lowers his sunglasses to consider me. “Are you all right? You look like hell.”

“No, I’m not all right!”

I hand him the note.

Adrien removes his sunglasses completely to read it, his mouth puckering bitterly. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He hands back the note. “Once a cheater, always a cheater.”

“Do you really think he’d—” I stop short, because it’s a foolish question, considering who I’m asking.

“I am surprised,” Adrien says with some degree of sympathy. “I know that Jace really likes you. Maybe he did this in retaliation. Even saints have an ego.”

In retaliation for what I did with Tim. I swallow, the anger swiftly replaced by guilt. “Yeah, but that was just…” I shake the note. “A whole night?”

“Sorry, pumpkin. Want me to call the office and let them know I’ll be late? We can talk it through.”

“That’s okay. I pulled an all-nighter. I’m gonna head home and crash. Thanks anyway.”

“You know how to reach me.”

I step away from the car so he can leave.

I’m not really going home. There’s no way I can sleep.

Not after this. I return to the trailer and sit on the edge of the bed to reread the note again, ignoring Samson’s attempts to cuddle with me.

I alternate between anger and sorrow, because yeah, maybe I do deserve this.

But it was just a kiss! And um… our cocks rubbing together.

I didn’t lie about it though. Or try to deny what happened.

Maybe he thought it was bullshit that I didn’t kiss Tim back. But that’s the truth!

Jace forgave me either way. I should forgive him too.

But first, he needs to be honest, like I was.

I need to know that I can still trust him.

I try to call Jace but only get his voicemail.

I leave a message, and then a text, both asking him to call me as soon as he can.

I stretch out on his bed and close my eyes to rest them, adrenaline still pumping through my veins.

Samson curls up against me and purrs, which makes me want to cry, because even that simple pleasure has been robbed of some of its joy.

I’m not sure how much time passes, but when I feel my phone vibrate, I sit up like a shot and answer after confirming it’s Jace.

“Is everything okay?” he asks.

The background noise tells me that he’s in an airport, but this can’t wait. “Aaron stopped by.”

“Who?”

“Aaron,” I repeat. “He left a note on your door.”

“About what?”

“The night you spent together.”

Jace is silent for a moment. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Want me to read the note to you?” I don’t let him respond. My voice is dripping with sarcasm as I orate, mostly from memory, because I’ve certainly been over the words enough. They stir the anger inside of me again.

“Someone is playing a game,” Jace says when I reach the end. “And it isn’t funny. I’ve never slept with anyone named Aaron.”

“What about that guy you almost kissed?” I ask with a tight throat. “What was his name?”

“It wasn’t Aaron.”

“Did you tell me the full truth about what happened with him?”

“Ben… You’re being played.”

“By who?”

“Tim.”

“Nice try! Adrien saw the guy who left the note. He knocked on his door too, and guess what? It wasn’t Tim! ”

“Then he put someone up to this.”

“How? Tim doesn’t know where you live!”

Jace has no answer for that.

“Even if he did,” I continue, “what if you were home when Aaron stopped by?”

“That wouldn’t be hard for Tim to figure out, since we always park on the street.”

“He doesn’t know that! Or what kind of car you drive. Stop trying to blame him!”

“It’s the only thing that makes sense!” Jace growls. “I know Adrien wouldn’t do this to me.”

“But we both know what you did to him.”

“Ben…” Jace says warningly. “That was a special circumstance.”

“Was this to get back at me?” I ask, my voice warbling. “If so, just tell me and we can move on. Please.”

I hear a muffled announcement on the other side of the phone. “I’m sorry,” Jace says. “I have to go. My next flight is about to leave.”

“How convenient,” I snap.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats. “I’ll call you back once I’ve landed. Just trust me until then. Okay?”

I can’t make that promise.

“Talk to you later,” I say before hanging up.

I roll over onto my side and curl into a fetal position, sobbing a few times before I force myself to calm down.

I need to think. Maybe he’s right. This could be Tim’s misguided way of making it possible for us to be together.

Maybe he picked up Adrien for their date and that’s how he figured out where Jace lives.

If so… I grab my phone and send Adrien a text, certain that the theory will be confirmed as soon as I get his response. If only.

We met at the restaurant.

I don’t think I ever told Tim about the trailer.

I don’t see how it could possibly be him unless…

What if Adrien wants Jace back, and he’s part of this scheme?

I press my hands to either side of my head and feel like I’m going crazy.

I need my best friend. I take a photo of the note and send it to Allison.

Not wanting to bias her, I keep the accompanying text short and sweet.

I found this on Jace’s door.

Have you talked to him about it? she responds .

Yeah. He denies it.

But you have your doubts.

Exactly.

Then call the number on the note.

So obvious! Here I am, cooking up conspiracy theories, when I can go straight to the source.

Of course, being me, I decide that I should pretend to be Jace and practice a voice that sounds more like him than my own.

Maybe I should run it by Allison first. Although I can already guess what she’d say.

Stop being an idiot. Just call and ask.

So that’s what I finally do.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” I reply. “Is this Aaron?”

“Yeah. Who’s this?”

“Jace’s boyfriend.”

After a lengthy pause, the voice squeaks out a response. “Oh! I… didn’t realize that Jace had a boyfriend.”

“When you left the note, you mean?”

“You saw that?” Aaron replies, having the decency to sound embarrassed.

“Yes. I’m not mad at you. I just want to know the truth.”

“Okay.”

Even that one little word is steeped in guilt.

“When were you with him last?”

“A couple weeks ago.”

My stomach sinks. Jace had to leave town for a few days. After I screwed up with Tim. Adrien was right. This is him getting back at me.

“Was that the only time?” I ask.

“Yes, I swear!”

“Okay. That’s all I needed to hear.”

“Wait! Are you going to break up with him?”

My brow knots up. “What do you care?”

“I’m… still interested.”

“Go fuck yourself!”

I hang up the phone, my indignation returning in full force. I don’t deserve this! If Jace wanted to make out with Adrien and get groped by him, then fine. That would be a little more fair. An eye for an eye. Having an all-night fuck fest with some little shit? No way. I am not cool with this !

My phone vibrates again. I hope that it’s Aaron so I can give him a piece of my mind. But no. Jace is calling me back.

“Yeah?” I say when answering.

He picks up on my tone, launching right into his defense. “I know what I have and haven’t done,” he says. “and I trust Adrien, so there’s only one explanation: Tim is trying to play us against each other.”

“I talked to Aaron,” I say.

“What?”

Jace sounds surprised. I guess he didn’t think I’d go that far.

“Yeah. He told me everything.”

“There’s nothing to tell because I didn’t sleep with him!”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Then maybe we should take a break.”

The breath leaves my lungs. I didn’t expect this. “Why? So you can be with him?”

“So you can do what needs to be done,” Jace says, his voice weary. “I’ve been there.”

“What do you mean?”

All I hear is silence. Even in the background. He must have found somewhere private to have this conversation.

“Jace?”

“Just promise to finish your thesis and get it turned in on time, okay?”

“ That’s what you’re worried about?”

“Yeah!” he shoots back. “Because I actually want what’s best for you! Remember that. After all this is over… Come find me, Ben, because I do love you.”

“I love you too,” I croak.

“Good luck.”

He hangs up.

I stare at my phone in disbelief. Then I begin to weep.