Page 39 of This Blood That Breaks Us (This Blood That Binds Us, #3)

Thirty-Two

Luke

Everything spun around me, and I could feel every particle of dust in my throat and lungs. When I blinked again, I saw Her. Her bloody mural in all its spectacular glory. Nothing in my body hurt. I’d never felt so weightless. It was better than drinking.

Suddenly, I was outside again, no longer moving. I’d been in the maze at some point, then I wasn’t. I couldn’t find my brother, so I went looking for Her.

Grass, stone, and dirt permeated the air as I tried getting up off my knees. The grass was so soft, sliding between my fingers like velvet. I wanted to rub my face on it forever, but I needed to get up.

Find me, My Love.

She called to me, and oh, how I longed to answer Her. That was the only reason I could get to my feet despite the world spinning. It was worse than any hangover or vertigo I’d ever had. I could barely move, let alone walk, but it didn’t matter.

My Love, I need you.

She needed me, and I’d crawl to Her if that’s what it took. My fingers sank into the dirt as I pushed myself to my feet, then I stumbled into the castle. No one passed me, but shouts and laughter could be heard in the distance.

I fell into a wall, taking a painting with me.

Closer. Come closer to Me.

Looking down the hall, a flash of white caught my attention. My Love was close. I needed to touch Her like I’d never needed anything else in my life. That yearning pushed me through every dizzying second. I’d find Her.

Closer.

She needed me. I dared to think of that and let the euphoria wash over me until I was picking up my pace. My whole body heated at the thought of Her uttering those words to me. I wanted nothing more than to give Her exactly what She wanted. To fulfill every utterable thought and syllable Her mouth could form, because suddenly, all I felt was my heart in my chest. No pain, no fear, no past. And the only thing left was Her.

I was on my knees, crawling again until the earth stopped shifting beneath me. Just another hallway. Another thing blocking my way to Her.

I need you closer to me, My Love.

This was a sad form of torture. To feel so good yet so empty because I hadn’t found Her yet. She ached for me, and I was failing Her, but the tension in my body shifted as I closed in on Her room. She was close.

She was at Her harp when I entered. Her delicate fingers rested on a string, and Her eyes widened.

“My Love. I wasn’t expecting you.”

But how? She’d been calling me, and it was so loud. My head spun, and in Her room where the light wasn’t as dim, I could see why I’d been so dizzy. Every object was spinning and blooming in its own intricate pattern. I rubbed my eyes, and when I opened them again, She was in front of me.

She radiated light. All Her skin was a sparkling beam so radiant I needed to touch it. My fingers grazed Her arm, and I shivered. She was so cold, but I was warm and could warm Her.

“You’re so beautiful. You’re all shiney and glittery.” The words tumbled out as I ran my finger over Her arm to the top of Her chest along Her bare collarbone.

“Love?” Her fingers lifted my chin for me to stare into Her eyes. Two glowing pools of starlight beckoned to me. “You drank the wine.”

She smiled, the worry dissipating from Her features.

“Too much,” I said, continuing to move my hand along Her arm.

Closer.

I heard the words, but Her lips didn’t move. Now that I was closer to Her, it wasn’t enough. All these months, I’d feared this. But why? She felt so good. Nothing could hurt me here.

“Can I touch you?”

Her head tilted to the side as She observed me. I wondered what She was looking for on my face. An answer to a question I didn’t know.

“Yes, Love.”

Slowly, I pulled at the edge of Her gown, lowering the sleeve so I could kiss Her shoulder and bring Her to me.

There were no words that could describe the feeling that pulsed through my veins when my lips grazed Her skin, but that feeling only left me hungrier and hungrier. I moved up Her neck, over Her chest, and to Her jaw. A soft sigh left Her lips. The room swirled and pulsed in a vivid gush of ecstasy, and every taste of Her was like forbidden fruit that made my stomach sour with need. Vicious, snarling need to take Her and bleed Her dry.

I slid the other sleeve of Her gown down to kiss there too. The night was young. There were so many ways I could make it last and prolong the vibrant euphoria running in my veins.

“Are you trying to undress me?” Her lips held a mischievous smile, and I kissed the corner of Her pale mouth.

“If you’ll allow me to.”

She invited me with Her lips on mine, and Her nails dug into my scalp as Her tongue entered my mouth. She tasted like ice-cold water on the hottest summer day.

I pulled Her gown to the floor, revealing two sheer pieces of white underwear that left every inch of Her pale skin on display.

With the room tilting, I laid Her over the bed. She watched in silent amusement. Like She was waiting to see how far I’d go and prove how much I wanted Her. Her hands rested above Her, and She let me spread Her legs. I kissed my way up Her thigh to Her throat.

“Do you want me, My Love?”

“You’re the only thing I’ve ever truly wanted.” I wasn’t surprised by my words. It felt true.

“Show me how much. Show me your devotion.”

“Anything for you.”

I kissed Her neck and pressed my lower half into Her.

Her absence jolted me as I was pulled backward and off the bed. The movement was so swift I had to cling to whoever was keeping me from falling to the floor. It took me a moment to steady myself while the room spun vigorously.

“He’ll be unhappy when it wears off tomorrow. You know that. He’ll blame you and he’ll blame me. Not to mention his brother will have a lot to say, I’m sure,” Ezra said.

“I won’t. Please let me stay.”

“We can’t risk Ascension,” he said.

Her starlight irises swirled like a whirlpool, and Her skin glistened like evening stars. What did he mean by that? Why was he doing this to me? Denying me the one thing that made sense.

She watched me like She might protest, with desire burning in those eyes for me.

“Another time, Love.” She nodded to Ezra, and he spun me so fast I grabbed on to his coat to keep from falling to the floor.

The world was shaking so much I couldn’t think about anything else for a moment.

“Are you angry with me?” Ezra asked as we walked.

He was holding me up much more than I thought I needed. Whatever was in the wine came in waves, because the walls were zigzagging into an infinite pattern that reached to the ceiling, and the floor vibrated my shoes like it had its own heartbeat.

“Yeah, a little.”

I thought of Her, the permanent ache of not being there with Her, and how if he hadn’t stopped me, I could be there with Her in Her bed.

“Maybe a lot.”

He said nothing else as we walked.

“Don’t let me drink the wine again.”

I was only vaguely aware of not liking the feeling. It was much easier to identify when my thoughts weren’t on Her. My stomach churned and things moved too much. I could barely keep my eyes open.

He chuckled. “I’ll note it. Don’t worry. It will pass.”

When we arrived at my room, he helped me to my bed. Zach had a rag over his head but peeked around it to see me. “Luke! I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, dude.”

Being in our room was true peace and safety, and I needed more of it. I wanted to wrap the feeling around me, even if it smothered me.

“Take me over there.” I pointed to my brother’s bed.

Ezra helped me into bed next to Zach. I gripped on the edge of the bedframe to try to stop the spinning.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” I said, sinking into the blankets.

A sense of calm enveloped me. It was so potent it might have been better than anything I’d felt that night. All the puzzle pieces were together, and I could close my eyes and rest. I needed nothing. I had it all.

“How long was it?” Zach said.

“Too long. Let’s never do that again,” I said.

“I’m locking you both in here till the morning.” Ezra’s voice was far away.

“We’re getting scolded, I think.” Zach chuckled.

“It’s okay. They’re stuck with us.” I smiled at the thought and pulled a pillow under my head.