Page 14 of This Blood That Breaks Us (This Blood That Binds Us, #3)

Eleven

Zach

“I need to talk to you.” It took a good hour for me to find Ezra in the vastness of the castle grounds. The obvious solution was a cell phone, which, shocker, still wasn’t allowed.

“I’m busy. I’ve got a lot of things to prepare since the meeting.”

My blood was boiling me alive. I hated to beg. I really hated to be asking him at all.

“Would you just help me? You’re the only one I can talk to about this. It’s important.”

Ezra stopped moving to study me. “What’s wrong?”

“I was with the queen alone today. I have questions.”

“Follow me.”

We walked back through the castle. I hadn’t been to all the rooms. There were too many to keep track of, and I wasn’t exactly trying to hang out with anyone. He led us down a way I hadn’t gone before. The floor turned to marble, and the click of his shoes echoed against the arched ceiling.

Finally, we reached a door. Carved on one side was the sun, and on the other, the moon. Inside was an atrium. A dome ceiling made of glass. And through it, you could see the vast night sky and all the stars that filled every bit of darkness. The floor was shiny marble that displayed various arrays of murals in different sections. Lots of winged men and constellations. Under my feet was the phrase “ Sic itur ad astra ,” and next to it was the English translation “ Thus one journeys to the stars .”

“What did She show you?”

“I know about Cecily. I met her.”

Ezra’s head shot up. “You spoke with her today?”

“Yeah, we got all acquainted in less than five minutes. Don’t think she’s going to like me very much.”

“I didn’t expect her to show herself this early.”

“Does Sirius know?”

“Of course. The Guard knows all. He prefers not to spend time with the queen in that state, which is why I am always the one to watch over her. Eros was also very fond of her. Akira didn’t mind watching her. But she didn’t favor him.”

“Yeah, well she favors Luke, and that’s my problem. He spent one day with her, and he was giving me that look. Like he’s about to do something stupid. So, I went to test his theories today and . . . I’m not going to tell him about Cecily. I told her to leave him alone, and I want you to back me up.”

“You want me to lie to your brother?”

“Yes. I want you to lie. That shouldn’t be a huge problem for you because you’ve done it before and probably do it all the time. And I want you to keep him away from her when she’s like that.”

“What are you most afraid of?”

I swallowed. Not anticipating his question.

“I’m afraid he’ll get himself hurt trying to save her. And getting close to Cecily will only make him want the queen more.”

His eyes softened. “Zach. It’s written. He will be close to the queen, and so will you.”

“I know. I just want to help him. I’m afraid for him.”

That thing was happening again. Where I spilled all my secrets to Ezra and told him real things about myself, but he already knew how I worried about Luke all the time.

He’d been with me the majority of my life, and there was one thing Ezra understood about me more than anyone else ever had: I needed Luke to be okay. I needed it like I used to need oxygen in the air. And now with the bond we had, it was worse.

I felt my brother’s sadness every hour of the day, and since I rarely slept, it was almost constant. Luke’s mental health was worse here, but it was more than that.

The bond was getting stronger.

“Is there something you’re not telling me?”

I looked down, shielding myself from the stars above. “No.”

I didn’t want to look at the stars anymore. I was angry at them for staring down at me and telling me what to do. Those little balls of gas were mocking me with their prophecies and shielding the gods and goddesses above.

“I will find out. You’ll slip up.”

Heat ran through me at his threat. “What’s stopping you from shoving your way into my head and taking what you want?”

He sighed as if he could get tired. Bastard.

“It’s not a threat, Zach. I have no desire to push my way into your head to hurt you.”

“There’s nothing. I need your help protecting Luke.”

Ezra had lied to me so many times. He’d hurt me. He’d manipulated me over and over, but I couldn’t help but lean on him in times of need because out of everyone there, he was the only one I knew who would protect Luke like me.

Like he had that day.

“I can’t do this.” I stood in the emergency room waiting for Luke while he was in surgery from his gunshot wound.

“He’ll be all right.” Ezra waited with me.

“You don’t get it. If something happens to him . . . I can’t deal. I won’t deal.”

“I understand.”

“No. You don’t. I won’t do this anymore. I can’t—”

“I understand.”

I cried into his shoulder like a little kid, and he told me he wouldn’t let anyone take my brother from me.

Ezra didn’t try to convince me to be different. He accepted me.

“I’ll help. Try to relax. You’re on the right path.”

I said nothing as I left. Anger was burning me alive. Those gods and goddesses were lucky they weren’t down on earth with me. They were lucky I didn’t have enough power.

Because I’d take them all down.

Hopefully, the lie wouldn’t matter because we’d be out before the next new moon.