Page 70 of The Primal of Blood and Bone (Blood and Ash #6)

A muscle twitched below his right eye. “It is.”

Skin prickling, I held his stare. “The Arae are supposed to ensure the balance, but as I said, I don’t think you know what balance is.”

“And you do ?” Lirian questioned.

“Apparently, more than you.”

“Poppy,” Holland called from behind me. “I understand what you’re saying,”—he paused, and I had the distinct impression that he was choosing his words carefully—“and maybe you have a point.”

“Maybe?” I looked over my shoulder at him.

“Maybe,” he repeated, his teeth clenching. “We are not without our flaws, Poppy. But the essence tells us when we’re crossing a line. And if we do, there are consequences.”

“Consequences to you?”

Holland didn’t answer, but his gaze cut away from me.

I shook my head. “If I had known what my Ascension would cause, I would never have allowed myself to Ascend. And I know what that means. My death. It’s not like I want to die—not when I’ve finally started to live.

” My throat thickened, but I didn’t let it choke me.

“Yet I still would’ve chosen that. Do you know why?

It has nothing to do with balance and everything to do with it being the right thing to do.

But none of you has or will make that same choice. ”

Lirian inhaled sharply. “That is a bold statement.”

“The truth isn’t bold.” I crossed my arms and turned my attention back to him. “It’s just the truth.”

The flesh of Lirian’s face thinned as the eather expanded, blotting out much of the color in his eyes. The air charged and thickened. The hazy outline of…wings formed behind him. “I feel I need to remind you, Penellaphe, that you’re not more powerful than me.”

“For now.”

His eyes became silver orbs.

Raising my brows, I smiled. “I felt the need to remind you of that .”

Eather lit the veins beneath his eyes as the air in the chamber went stagnant. “You want to talk about balance and choice, right and wrong?” Lirian said. “Talk about failure? How about the failure of Alastir and the Unseen? Your brother-in-law.” He paused. “Your sister .”

“What?”

“Lirian.” Holland stood.

“All of them knew what you would bring upon the realms. All of them wanted the same thing,” Lirian hissed. “You dead.”

Sucking in a shallow breath, I took a step back without realizing it.

My…my sister? Malik wasn’t a surprise. He could’ve succeeded when he came to Lockswood, but he couldn’t do it.

He’d changed his mind. But Millicent? Malik had said she hadn’t been able to even consider killing a child—her sister.

Had that been a lie? It had to be, because a Fate would know.

And that… hurt .

Though I wasn’t even sure why. I barely knew her.

“You didn’t know that?” Lirian raised his brows.

“That’s enough,” Holland warned.

“I’m sorry.” Lirian’s mouth pressed into a tight, practiced smile as he furrowed his brow in the poorest attempt of concern I’d ever seen. “But it’s just the truth .”

My heart beat once. Then twice.

I swung at him.

Lirian was fast.

His hand snaked out and caught my wrist. Holland’s shout was lost in the faint charge of power dancing from the Ancient’s skin to mine.

“I was hoping you would do that.” Lirian laughed.

Before I could take another breath, his hand clamped down on my throat and his fingers dug into my skin as he lifted me. Spinning, he slammed my back into the wall of glass. The window cracked, and dull pain flared along my spine.

Instinctually, I reached for the eather, but it responded only with a weak flutter as I grasped his wrist.

Lirian smirked as if he knew I’d tried to summon the essence and failed.

But I didn’t need it to kick his ass.

My stomach muscles tightened as I drew up my legs.

Or tried to.

They didn’t respond to the command my brain was sending to them. They remained dangling against the glass.

I tried again.

My heart stuttered as my gaze met his. I couldn’t move my legs. Or my arms or head. What air I could get into my lungs lodged in my throat. I couldn’t move at all.

Lirian smiled as that outline of wings filled in, full of crackling eather. “As I said, you’re not more powerful than me.”

Fury exploded through me like the force of a wildfire as I could do nothing more than lock glares with him.

“Let her go,” Holland commanded.

It didn’t seem like Lirian was about to do that as he held me at eye level. “We should’ve been the ones to handle this.”

“Lirian,” Holland shouted.

“That’s what I wanted.” Tendrils of heated eather started to swirl around his shoulders. “We should’ve killed you. And believe it or not,” Lirian said, “I would’ve happily carried it out. Rules be damned.”

My eyes widened as a blur of black shot across the chamber.

“I was more than willing to make that—”

Thorne appeared behind Lirian and grabbed him by the shoulder. “Release her,” he ordered. “Now.”

Jaw clenched, Lirian lifted one finger at a time and let me go. I landed on my feet, managing not to stumble.

Thorne yanked the other Ancient back, and I stepped away from the window as Lirian suddenly went airborne and flew across the chamber.

He hit a pillar with a nice, fleshy smack and fell forward, his knees cracking off the floor.

“Are you okay?” Thorne asked me.

“Yes.” My heart still pounded as I touched my sore throat. Glancing up at the Ancient, I saw that he still held his glass. Wow. “Thanks.”

“Not necessary,” he replied, lifting the glass to his lips as he turned to Lirian.

The Ancient was standing now, tugging the front of his tunic down, straightening it. He stilled as I started toward him, anger carving into the taut lines of his features.

“I’m so gonna find out how many Arae are around and exactly how many the realms can afford to lose,” I told him, ignoring the slight ache in my throat that accompanied each word. “And you know what I’m going to do once I have that information?”

Lirian smirked. “I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”

“Poppy,” Holland called.

Ignoring Holland, I didn’t blink as I stared up at Lirian. “I’m going to come for you.”

Something flickered in Lirian’s eyes and darted across his face as I sensed his unease.

“You need to leave,” Holland said, turning to Lirian. “Now.”

Holding my stare, the Ancient stepped back and vanished with a charge of energy.

“Will I be able to do that someday?” I asked, staring at the space in front of the pillar. “Poof in and out of chambers?”

“One day,” Holland answered. “Yes.” His inhale was audible. “I’m sorry about that. He shouldn’t have behaved that way.”

Nodding, I turned to him. “Why didn’t you all kill me?”

Holland went completely still for what was likely only seconds but felt like hours. “Because it went to a vote, and the decision to end your life was not unanimous.”

I stared. “You all voted on whether or not I should die?”

“We did.” Thorne strode toward the table and picked up the carafe. He frowned.

“I know how that sounds.” Holland returned to his seat. “But we had a choice to make. Allow you to be born and grow or not.”

“Well…” What was I even supposed to say to that? “I guess I know what Lirian voted. What about you two?”

“I think it’s clear what I voted for.” Thorne placed his glass on the table and crossed his arms. “I was against it.”

My gaze flicked to Holland.

“I was also against it.”

“Why?”

Holland didn’t answer.

Irritation grew as I grabbed a piece of hair and spun it around my finger. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“You remind me so much of her,” Holland murmured.

“Do I even want to know who you’re referencing?”

“Seraphena.”

“Oh.”

His gaze flicked to my hand. “She has a habit of doing just as you are when she’s either nervous or busying her hands in an attempt not to use them. On someone.”

“Oh,” I whispered again, my hand stilling.

Holland clasped his hands behind his back. “You know what must be done.”

I did.

I was just about to ask him how him telling me what needed to be done wasn’t considered interference, but I figured it would be a waste of my time.

“Do you have any questions?”

“Can you tell me anything useful about defeating Kolis?”

Holland returned my stare with a look as lifeless as the marble statues lining the Hall of Gods.

“Whatever,” I said, wanting to leave and return to Casteel. But something Lirian had said resurfaced. “Why would my birth have anything to do with Kolis?”

A flicker of something like discomfort or unease passed over Holland’s stoic face, sending a wave of dread through me. “It’s because of what you are.”

So, it was because of the essence I carried within me? I probably should’ve guessed that at this point.

“It’s because of who you are,” Thorne added, drawing my gaze to his. “To him.”

“I’m nothing to him.” The words spilled out before I could even process them, each laced with venom that surprised me. Sure, Kolis was the enemy, and from what I knew of him, he sounded like a horrible being, but I had no personal ties to him. Still, those stinging words made it feel personal.

The splotches of blue and brown in Thorne’s gaze churned. “You are everything to him.”

I’ve always known you . A chill of revulsion crawled up my spine at the dry, brittle voice that slithered into my mind. I’d taken a step back without realizing it. Where had I heard that voice before?

Thorne stared, his gaze unwavering.

“You know what needs to be done.”

Blinking at the sound of Holland’s voice, I dragged my attention from Thorne. “I know.” I swallowed the taste of bile. “I need to end Kolis. And I will.”

“Good.” The essence flared brightly in Holland’s eyes as a silver, shimmering line of energy appeared to our right. A tear in the realm started to open. “Once you return to the mortal realm, your powers will be unbound.”

I almost thanked him. Luckily, I stopped myself and decided it was probably best to leave without saying another word. I turned to the tear, catching the faint scent of pine. My heart sped up, but I faced them. “What was the point?”

“Of?” Thorne asked.

“Of this. Today,” I said. “Our not-very-helpful chat.”

Holland laughed quietly. “It was important for you to know what you are.”

I met his stare. “I already know who I am.”

Glancing at Thorne, I turned once more.

“Poppy,” Holland called.

Damn it.

I stopped.

“Life always prevails,” Holland said.

“But you.” Thorne stepped forward, his swirling eyes meeting mine. “Only you can liberate bone and ash. Only you can liberate death.”