Page 140 of The Primal of Blood and Bone (Blood and Ash #6)

POPPY

You’re Sotoria.

The words echoed in my head, my heart thundering. Each beat was a deafening roar that silenced all other sounds until I heard Casteel’s voice.

And felt his shock whip through the chamber like a burst of cold wind.

“That’s impossible,” he stated harshly. His tone brooked no room for argument as the haziness surrounding the dream I’d had while in stasis evaporated.

“I know it’s hard to hear and believe, but it is true.” Seraphena rose and placed her palms flat on the table. Her eyes met mine. “I carried your soul within me.”

“No,” I repeated hoarsely, even as I saw her clearly in that field of poppies along the Cliffs of Sorrow.

“It’s why I’ve been able to connect with you, even while in stasis,” Seraphena insisted, her voice calm save for a slight quiver. “I’ve never been able to reach Millicent.”

“You’re wrong,” Casteel bit out, those two words raw and volatile.

“I wish I was—gods, do I ever.” Her head bowed. “I never wanted her to be in this situation again.”

Again .

The word was like a clap of thunder. The chamber seemed to blur and fade at the edges as if the realm were unraveling around me.

It was like I was there. I saw her holding that basket as the sky turned to crimson-streaked midnight. She’d spoken to me before I heard Seraphena’s voice calling to me, pulling me out of reach of the cold shadows.

You know who I am , she had said in a voice that…sounded like mine. And you know where you are. You’ve been here countless times before, in one way or another.

I flinched, feeling the essence vibrate in my chest.

And she had warned me. He’s almost here.

Death .

But it wasn’t her.

Because I saw now what I’d seen in that dream.

I saw myself.

The fear I’d felt then had coated my skin as different, fleeting images formed in my mind, glimpses of places I didn’t remember traveling and faces I had no memory of. They melded together as voices rose around me and the air charged with energy. I had a sinking feeling the images were real.

I thought about how uneasy I felt looking upon the Cliffs. How I found myself staring at them without even realizing it—even while I slept.

“She’s not in any situation,” Casteel argued with a swipe of his hand. “You don’t know—”

“A Primal cannot lie,” Seraphena cut him off. “We can skirt the truth. We can omit it. But we cannot tell a blatant lie.”

His head jerked back as if Seraphena had slapped him. Like me, he knew she spoke the truth. His breathing was heavy, his heart pounding fast in rhythm with mine.

“I’m sorry,” Seraphena uttered, her arms trembling. “I never wanted this for you.”

The chamber vanished for just a moment, and I saw gold .

“Bars,” I whispered, stumbling backward. My legs hit a chair, and I sat. Or fell. I wasn’t sure which, as I remembered what I’d briefly seen while in stasis. “Gold bars.”

Casteel whirled toward me, his piercing amber gaze lit by eather. “Poppy.”

I gripped the chair, my fingers slipping over the smooth wood. “A gilded cage.”

Seraphena’s eyes slammed shut.

“What are you saying?” Casteel asked.

“I saw it in stasis. I was in one when he got inside my head. I didn’t know what it meant then. I still don’t.”

“Kolis kept Sotoria in a gold cage,” Seraphena said.

I jerked back, a thousand denials screaming in my head as icy rage poured off Casteel, causing the tiny hairs on the nape of my neck to rise. I swung toward him and sucked in air. Shadows blossomed under the flesh of his throat and traveled upward, swirling across his cheeks—

My lips parted as Seraphena staggered back, catching herself before she stepped off the platform. We both stared at Casteel as tendrils of crimson pierced the darkness, and his skin thinned until the bone was visible.

The silver gleam of bone.

All I could think of was the bone dagger that had pierced his flesh and the knowledge I didn’t want to accept that’d come to me.

Eather swallowed the golden hue of his irises in a flash of silver, changing them. They flamed like burning coals—black like the Ascended’s but lit with the glow of fire.

He looked nothing like the man I was familiar with. Instead, a God of Death stood there. The essence in me flared in response to the display of pure power. I had a strange urge to run, and for him to chase, causing my stomach to tighten.

There was something seriously wrong with me.

The red in his eyes brightened, and he cocked his head. Seraphena glanced at the windows just as I heard…the croaks of ravens. They appeared outside a second later, their talons scraping—and wings beating—the glass.

I inhaled and twisted back to him. “Cas.”

His entire body stiffened at the sound of my voice, and the frigid fury retracted instantly, the churning mass of shadows and crimson seeping back into his flesh. Within a breath, the bone was no longer visible, and I felt the rate of his heart slowing.

I forced a swallow. “Are you…okay?”

Casteel’s eyes slammed shut, and his striking features contorted. “Gods,” he choked out. “You’re asking me that?”

“Uh…” Still holding on to the arms of the chair, I pitched forward. “I’m not sure if you realize it, but I, like, totally saw your bones .”

He blinked. “My bones?”

I nodded and then looked over at Seraphena. She was back to staring at him like she wasn’t quite sure what to make of him. “Right?”

“Holy fuck balls,” she whispered.

Okay. She had definitely seen it, too.

“I’m fine.” Thick lashes lifted, and I was relieved to see warm-amber eyes, but while usually warm and inviting, they now held a depth of sorrow that seemed to stretch through time.

He crossed the space between us and knelt before me, placing his hands on my knees and squeezing them gently. “Are you okay?”

“I…I don’t know,” I admitted.

He held my gaze for a moment and then nodded. “We’ll figure it out,” he vowed. “Then we’ll make sure you’re okay. All right?”

“All right,” I murmured.

“This is why I wanted to speak to her privately.” Seraphena’s voice reached us, the tone blade-sharp. “So she had time to process before dealing with anyone else’s feelings.”

I tensed.

But Casteel only smiled at me, flashing a hint of those dimples.

Leaning forward, he pressed a kiss to my forehead and then rose.

He crossed his arms and tested the limits of the ridiculously ill-fitted shirt, standing before me like a guardian.

“I understand why you wanted that,” he said.

“I should’ve kept better control of myself. ”

Seraphena watched him. “Glad you’re at least self-aware.”

“I may not always be, but I am always aware of her ,” he stated. “Before we talk about anything else, I want to make one thing clear. She’s not Sotoria. She is Penellaphe Da’Neer—Poppy, if she allows it.”

My breath snagged as my chest swelled. Gods, I couldn’t love this man more.

“You’re right,” Seraphena said. “She is Sotoria reborn. But, at the end of the day, who Sotoria was is gone, and she is Penellaphe.”

Casteel nodded curtly. “Glad we’re on the same page.”

Her gaze shifted to me. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

I opened my mouth, closed it, and then tried again. I felt…numb. Like I had when I learned Kolis could influence me. Detached. “I think I would like something to drink now.”

A small smile appeared on her face. “Understandable.” Turning, she went to the armoire, picked up the bottle, and poured me a glass. “Casteel?”

“I’m good.”

Seraphena turned and started toward us, and I went to rise.

“I got it.” Casteel moved forward, took the short, square glass from Seraphena, and brought it to me.

“Thank you,” I said and took it. Energy passed through our fingers as they brushed. I took a sip of the rich liquor, barely tasting the slight hint of caramel as Casteel moved to stand beside me. “I…I don’t even know what to say.”

Which was true. All I could think about right now was whether Ian knew about this? Was that why he’d told me Sotoria’s story—what was considered a legend now and all but forgotten by the masses?

“You mentioned that you saw something while in stasis,” Seraphena said, skirting the platform.

“A cage.” A muscle in Casteel’s jaw flexed.

The gilded cage Sotoria had been kept in…like a pet. Or, more accurately, a prisoner.

My stomach churned. I wasn’t sure my next drink helped. “I only briefly saw that.”

“Did you see anything else?” Casteel asked as Seraphena approached the sitting area.

“I think so—no, I did see other things—but…” Frowning, I tried to make sense of what I remembered, but it was like trying to view a portrait in the darkness. “It’s like the memories are hazy and out of focus.”

“It was like that for me after my Ascension.” Seraphena sat across from me.

“But I remember seeing people I didn’t recognize and places that looked nothing like anything today. Almost as if they were from a different time.” I forced myself to let go of the chair arms. “I saw her. I remember that now.”

“Sotoria?” she questioned.

I nodded. “I saw her at the Cliffs. She was picking flowers—poppies.” A thin, hoarse laugh parted my lips.

Her ? She ? I couldn’t think of her as me.

“It was right before I woke.” My gaze lifted to Casteel as my mind reeled from the fragmented memories, quickly piecing themselves together.

“She told me to listen. Said you were calling to me. And I heard you. You asked me to open my eyes.”

Casteel’s chest rose sharply. “I did.” He swallowed. “I did ask you to do that.”

“And I heard you calling to me.” I faced Seraphena. “You said…it was time for me to wake up.”

“How did you do that?” Casteel asked. “I tried to reach Poppy in her sleep but couldn’t find her.”

“I had help from a God of Dreams,” she told us. I think we both had questions, but she continued. “It took a bit, but he was able to find you.” She watched me closely. “Is that all you remember from that dream?”

I started to say yes but couldn’t force it past my lips. “She warned me he was coming.”

Casteel turned his head to the side and stretched his neck. “Kolis?”