Page 196 of The Primal of Blood and Bone (Blood and Ash #6)

“That’s what I wanted him to see before I ended your life.” His lips parted, revealing the tips of large fangs. “I wanted the last thing he saw to be my cock slamming into you while I tore your throat out.”

My fingers didn’t twitch.

“You may think that’s excessive. Maybe it is.” Kolis’s lips touched mine as he spoke. “But the so-called King is arrogant and disrespectful. And you.” He bit down on my lower lip. “You are nothing more than a whore.”

I didn’t swallow.

“So, I’ll have to make do with telling him how you screamed for mercy as I fed from you.

And you will scream, so’lis .” His tongue caught the blood on my lip.

“And then, after your heart stops and I take your essence within me, I will take your soul. You know what that means, don’t you?

I can bring you back. And I will.” He twisted my head to the side, baring my throat.

“This won’t be the end of you, so’lis . So, you’d better not displease me. And give me what I want.”

Kolis’s lips brushed my pulse.

Essence sputtered and then thrummed, unfurling from the pit in my stomach. It was hot and cold but nowhere near as intense as I’d felt it before.

“And just in case you forgot,” he whispered. “I only want your screams.”

Eather poured into my veins.

“This is going to hurt,” he promised.

I lifted my arm, ignoring the pain flaring across ribs that had yet to heal whatever fractures they had in them.

“A lot.”

Fangs scraped my throat.

I sank my fingers into his hair, jerking his head back. Crimson-and-black eyes locked with mine. “You will be the only one screaming.”

His upper lip curled. “You bi—”

I slammed my knee between his legs with enough force to squish everything there.

The bastard didn’t scream. Not yet. He roared as he let go of my hair and reared back, cupping himself. Blood drained from his face as he started to list to the side.

The corners of my vision turned silver and gold as I rolled my hips inward, drawing my legs up.

My jaw clenched against the agony in my back and shoulder.

I kicked out, planting both boots into his chest and knocking him back.

He hit the floor, and I didn’t waste time.

Hissing through the pain, I sprang to my feet, unleashing a bolt of pure energy, I let out a ragged breath as I stumbled.

Golden light streaked with silver and faint shades of black and red arced and crackled.

The essence slammed into his shoulder, sending him sliding across the floor.

I knew it wasn’t enough to kill him—I knew it was probably causing me more harm than him—but I kept it up, channeling everything I had in me into it.

Kolis writhed on the floor, his back bowing as Primal mist spilled out of him, a thin, churning mass of crimson and black that quickly faded.

When I felt the eather pulsing and flickering inside me, I let go and extended my hand.

Conjuring the image of the dagger I’d seen Attes holding, I used what was left of the essence.

A heartbeat later, the bone dagger smacked against my palm. Stalking forward as he rose to his knees, I drove mine into the side of his head. He went down again, and I followed, pressing my boot into what was left of his balls.

I wasn’t escaping.

I was going to die by Kolis’s hands, breaking the bond forged by the Joining.

I didn’t want to die, but a sense of calmness washed over me as I dropped, aiming once more for his heart.

It reminded me of Spessa’s End, when I held the blade to my throat.

I hadn’t wanted to die then either, but I was ready if it meant protecting Casteel and those I had come to know and love.

And I was ready to do it now, too.

I just needed to fuck Kolis up enough that it would give Casteel and Kieran time to fight and save themselves and as many as they could.

That was all that mattered now.

I drove the dagger down with a scream, burying the dagger in his chest. Kolis grunted, his body jerking.

Blood sprayed across my hands as I yanked the blade out and slammed it back down.

I stabbed him over and over as a raw, hoarse sound filled my ears, and shimmering crimson coated my hands and dripped down my face.

My throat ached, and that sound—the pained screaming—was coming from me as I lifted the bone dagger high once mo—

I didn’t even see Kolis’s fist.

I felt it, though.

Pain exploded along the side of my head as I was flung sideways.

I hit the floor and rolled until I smacked into the side of the dais.

Groaning, I forced my arms to move. I pushed up onto my knees and spat a mouthful of blood onto the floor.

A different sort of buzzing droned then, muting my hearing. I rocked back and started to stand—

The floor began to tremble as my vision went in and out. Head and face throbbing, I felt the tile crack beneath my palms before I gripped the edge of the dais. Using that for support, I dragged myself upright and turned.

What I saw standing there looked nothing like a man.

Instead, it was a being that was more crimson bone and churning shadows than flesh.

I wouldn’t have even known it was Kolis if not for the bloodstained white pants.

My gaze lifted to the blurry image of wings behind him—wings that reminded me of a draken’s.

Kolis was in front of me before I knew it, and something struck my chest, knocking me back against the dais again.

My eyes locked with red ones that glowed with an unholy fire as I went to take a breath, but I couldn’t seem to get enough air into my throat or chest. I felt something hot and warm running down my stomach as a faint icy yet burning sensation rippled across my chest. Confused, I looked down.

A leather-wrapped hilt jutted from the center of my chest. It wasn’t flush against my skin. A sliver of the blade was visible, revealing the dull-white of Ancient bone. Of Attes’s dagger.

He’d stabbed me.

The fucker had stabbed me.

With trembling arms, I lifted my hands and gripped the hilt as I moved my gaze.

His fleshless mouth opened wide in a grotesque smile. “Figured I owed you one.”

“You missed,” I breathed, the taste of blood stronger. “You missed…my heart, you jackass.”

His laugh was like dry bones. “I didn’t miss.”

I pulled the bone dagger free—

Kolis’s arm clamped around my waist, trapping mine as his other hand fisted my braid and yanked my head back roughly. Before I could take another breath, he struck.

I screamed.

I couldn’t stop it. The pain was too sudden, too shocking. I screamed as his fangs pierced the skin of my throat, tearing deep. Muscles in my body locked up as my hand opened on reflex. The dagger slipped from my fingers. I didn’t hear it fall.

The fiery agony of his bite didn’t let up. He didn’t pull his fangs free. He kept them buried as he drank, taking long, hard swallows as he held me to his cold chest, slick with both his blood and mine.

The eather pulsed wildly as a primitive sort of instinct took over, pushing my body past the paralyzing pain.

There was no skill in my attempt to free myself.

I became panic, anger, and fear. I went wild against him, kicking at his legs as I strained against his hold.

Nothing worked. Nothing dislodged him. Stopped him.

He kept feeding, kept taking my blood—my essence—into him, and it felt like his fangs hadn’t just pierced my skin but had lodged deep in the very core of my being.

My chest rose and fell rapidly as I tried to summon the eather, but I couldn’t pull on it.

“Stop,” I whispered, begged—or thought I did. I couldn’t be sure. It sounded like someone else was screaming it as I fought.

The edge of the dais dug into my back as he trapped me between it and him. It didn’t matter. My legs no longer kicked. I couldn’t even feel them.

Oh, gods.

I couldn’t feel my hands or arms, either.

Oh, gods, I wasn’t ready.

I wasn’t.

I didn’t want to die.

I wanted to see Casteel.

I wanted to hold Cas, tell him how much I loved him. I wanted to see Kieran, witness his rare smiles. I wanted to apologize to Tawny. I wanted to feel Delano’s soft fur as I hugged him. I wanted to get to know Millicent, my father, my grandparents. I wanted to live—to really live.

I didn’t want to die in Kolis’s arms.

Not again.

But I was. I could feel the coldness of death slipping through my veins and seeping into my muscles.

I felt death entrenching itself in my bones.

The essence thrummed hotly in the center of my chest. The swaying lights above me dimmed and then darkened.

For a brief few moments, I didn’t feel the nerve-wrecking pain.

There was nothing. But it didn’t last. The agony yanked me back, and I realized I was on the floor with Kolis above me, feeding, taking. And he no longer had to hold me still.

I concentrated on the embers of eather as I closed my eyes.

I didn’t try to reach Cas through the notam .

I wasn’t even sure I could because I couldn’t feel it, but I wouldn’t do that to him anyway.

I didn’t want him to know for as long as possible.

I wanted him to have hope, even if only for a few more minutes.

So, I focused on a memory of him. That was all I could see as some soul-deep tugging motion started in my chest. It felt like hot claws digging in, but I kept the image of Casteel in my mind—one of him reclining against the headboard, his chest bare and dotted with faded scars, his skin flawed but perfect, nonetheless.

His head was tilted to the side, his full lips curved in a half-grin, revealing that infuriating dimple in his right cheek.

His eyes were the color of heated honey under dark lashes. He was beautiful. He was…

My heart.

My soul.

My King.

Casteel Da’Neer was my everything, and I would never stop loving him.

Not in this life, whether it be my last, or if I was brought back.

I would always love him. I held on to that image for as long as I could, my lips moving soundlessly, speaking three words…

I love you . I love you . Over and over I spoke them as I began to shake, as the air around us charged and hissed. I love you. I love you—

A faint shiver of awareness danced across my skin.

I felt…something.

Powerful.

Cold and unyielding.

I dragged in a shallow breath that carried the scent of fresh lilacs and…citrus. My chest froze, and my eyes fluttered open.

My vision was fuzzy at the edges and blurred in the center, but I thought I saw a flash of intense light as the quaking inside me seemed to spread to the walls and the ceiling.

I thought I saw movement in that light before my vision faded away, before I faded: someone standing, tall and broad-shouldered, face obscured by a helmet made of black stone. I thought I saw something else prowling forward, head low and snarling.

I thought I saw a large wolf with fur the color of bright moonlight.