Page 17 of Sins and Virtue

My gaze dropped from his eyes to his lips— full, smooth lips that appeared experienced and tainted to kiss.

The tension enveloped us like a warm fire, and with time it only grew worse.

“Let me go,” I commanded, feeling uncomfortable being this close. My body was tired, damp, and strained— all I wanted to do was take a shower and go to sleep.

He didn’t make a snarky remark or question me. He simply removed his hands from me, the heat of his touch slowly dyinglike a drowning bonfire as he stepped a few steps back. Giving me space to move around.

“Thanks.” I remained neutral, taking a few steps forward towards my drawer, scrambling around for some change of clothes, and then opening the bathroom’s door. Flickering the light switch on as it brightened the stormy gray-blue atmosphere. “I’m going to take a shower.”

He turned his back slightly, watching me. “You don’t have to state your every movement. I can see the obvious.”

“I’m being held hostage. Don’t you think I could escape through the bathroom?”

“The bathroom doesn’t have windows.”

An eerie sensation pricked in my gut, wondering how long he had been watching or, worse yet, stalking me. I asked steadily. “How do you know that?”

“I tried to come in that way first but then noticed the window next to your bed, so I opted for that instead.” He explained casually and without shame.

Is this man for real?

And I thought he was some genius.

I deadpanned, shaking my head as I grabbed the knob and slammed the door behind me. Taking some time in the shower as the piping hot water tracked down my body to the tile floor and swallowed down the drain. Closing my eyes and letting all the heaviness weigh down upon me.

Instead of choosing to do the right thing and report him, I was working with him.

Was this really an honorable thing to do?

Was helping a criminal escape for whatever reason excusable?

How could I face my actions in front of the other nuns and the priest? When in my heart it felt like it was the only choice I had?

A sigh fled my lips. Not being any closer to the answer. Both for this situation and my own.

Wishing I could escape my own head but when I tried, my vision blurred, watching the red blood splatter against my cheeks and puddling around me while gunshots and frantic screams echoed over the wind, watching as life escaped his red-hazed eyes, his body collapsing to the ground. Sentencing my fate to be what it is.

Chaining me to a hell I could never escape from.

Sometimes it felt like my soul was burning, and there was nothing I could do to fix it. Only hope and wish for redemption.

If such a thing were possible.

Noticing, I cleaned my skin until it was sensitive and red. I proceeded to turn off the shower, dry myself, and slip into my Victorian white nightgown with a V-line plunging around my breasts while my nipples peeked through and my sleeves slid off my shoulders as the fabric clung to my hips. It was the most modest thing I could find in the downtown markets.

But because of the shape of my body, there was nothing left to the imagination.

To be honest, my body was really never meant for modesty.

What can we do?

My shoulders shrugged.

Hopefully, the bastard won’t get any ideas.

After contemplating how to lessen the temptation, I brushed my long, unruly brown hair and draped it over my chest. Running my fingers through my locks, missing the touch and look of them since they were hidden all day.

Never thought I would miss this small luxury.