Page 11 of Sins and Virtue
“And what do you exactly do, Blair?”
“How do you know my name?”
The intrusive question hung in the air, enveloping me in warmth, like being near a warm fireplace on a cold winter’s night.
“Secrets don’t stay here for long.” He remained mysterious, but there was a sense of a smirk in his voice. “But if I were to be honest, I heard it while you were talking to Tomaso. He’s the newly religious fanatic around here. Trying to talk and convert everyone.”
I crossed my arms, unimpressed. “Ah, so you’re not only a common criminal but also a gossiper.” I bluntly mentioned.
“Trust me, sweetheart, there is nothing common about me. If you haven’t noticed, you’re in the only penitentiary in the country. Most men here are on the Interpol wanted list. So do your research before you run your mouth.”
Dammit, he got me there.
“Doesn’t matter to me. You’re all the same. Criminals at the end.”
“Criminals, huh?” He came closer until the light reached one side of his face, the other still concealed in the shadows. But the part visible to me stole my breath as I had to look up and take in all of him. The brightness was showing off his dark, magnetic handsomeness. His black hair stood out like the multitude of tattoos that covered his arms, hands, and neck. His eyes were the color of the cold sea in the midst of the night when the moon and the stars blazed over the tide. His cruel eyes showed that no sanity revealed something darker, almost like another monster lurking beneath. Hiding and trying to pull me into his trap as he stared down at me. “Why don’t you come inside and see how I’ll have you begging for this poor sinner, Blair?” My name rolled off his tongue like some exotic drug. It was forbidden. Addicting. And absolutely damning.
This game was a type of mental foreplay I didn’t even know about but found myself wanting more.
“I’m not scared of you.”
“You should be.” He reached out his hand towards the railing and lapped it over mine. A swift charge rushed in between us, and the power lingered on me for dear life.
“Blair,” Sister Francis called out. “Let’s go. If he doesn’t want to be bothered, move on.”
I gazed back at him, too drawn to stay and unfold the layers of this enigmatic, deranged man.
“Run along, sister, before you won't be able to escape.” He taunted, flashing his teeth before retreating backward into the darkness. Leaving my mind branded with his impression.
“How was the prison service?” Sister Marie excitedly questioned, her bright blue eyes intently searching me from the other side of the altar as we prepared for the last mass of the day. Her blonde hair peeked out from beneath her veil as I tried to help place it back underneath. She quietly thanked me as she adjusted her full black long-sleeved dress and cape. “So how was it?”
Like hell.I wanted to say before flashing a brief smile, my eyes twitching.
“It was alright. The prison is a bit rough, but I’ll get used to it.”
“That’s everyone’s reaction.” She leaned in and giggled like a child. “I swear I believe it’s a torture trial that Sister Francis likes to enact to see if we’re really invested in this.”
Marie was similar to me, as she was one of the younger nuns in the convent. Her journey had begun last year, and this was her first full year as a full-fledged nun. So she had been showing me the ropes.
Truthfully, I was grateful for her.
Ever since my initiation, I clung to her like a kitten to its mother, trying to desperately survive.
“I imagine it wouldn’t be easy. After all, nothing in life is easy if you want to do good,” I pointed out before remembering a certain criminal that made my head rush with adrenaline, making it feel fuzzy. “But there’s potential for improvement.”
Her brows jumped up, excited. “Exactly, my friend, we must see it as a working project that we mustn’t give up on. The Lord looks to us to help redeem those who don’t know him.” Sincerity melted in her words. Her gentle gaze was tender. Her heart wasone of the few that was pure and clean. She inspired me in my journey to faith. Sometimes it only took one person to change your view and open your mind to other experiences.
“Girls, hurry, the compline is about to start,” Sister Alice, our gentle mediator, insisted as she passed by, eyeing our half-assed work.
Quickly we got back to business and prepared the altar with the oils, the Bible, the chalice, and other sacred vessels needed for Father Andrea to complete the service.
Once the Eucharist, or the consumption of bread and wine, was dispersed, the congregation of people finished their prayers, and we as nuns were the last to receive the Holy Communion. I swiftly made my way back to my spot off to the side of the altar and prayed.
The mass had concluded with a blessing and some wise words from Father Andrea as he dismissed everyone. Some churchgoers left quickly to go home to sleep, while many stayed to talk amongst themselves or other members of the church. Through the open arch of the doorway I noticed that the once bright sun had died out, being replaced by dark ashen clouds, and the rumbling of the thunder echoed in the distance. The color itself reminded me of the condemned soul that had threatened me earlier. There was something about that inmate that awakened the darkest cravings of my soul.
Stop thinking about him.
It was more than futile and absolutely forbidden to think about any man. I already had one love whose heart belonged to me, and even though I couldn’t be with him, that was more than enough for me in this lifetime.