Page 86 of Fragments

For nearly twelve months, I’ve been crushing on him in secret, and it’skillingme more and more each day. Granted, I think he probably knows… I’m sure everyone does. I’m clearly very bad at hiding it, which is nuts, because I’m not usually this guy. Outside of prison, I was always super chill with men I liked. Or rather, men I wanted to bone.

Okay,maybe I used to get a little whacky around Callum at times, but that was just because he was blatantly using me.

Lex is myfriend. We’ve been friends since the first day we met, and I won’t say I hate it, because he’s a great guy and I just love being around him. But if I ever want him to see me asmore, I’ll need to play it way cooler than I am.

I mean, honestly…The first day we met, I basically declared my love for him. Not in so many words, but it was an epic disaster. And since then, I’ve been actively trying not to scare him, while also spending as much time around him as is possible in prison, which is nowhere near as much as I’d like. It’s already a mild form of torture only being able to see him a few times a day, for meals and showers.

Don’t get me started on the showers…

But hanging out alone?Forget about it. Completely out of the question.

My options in getting him to notice me as maybe more than a friend are seriously limited. But I refuse to give up.

I ain’t no quittin bitch.I’ve turned many a straight boy in my day, and the thing about prison is… nothing but time.

I feel like someone’s watching me, and my face springs up, hoping it’s Lex. Instead, I find Officer Peters giving me a shifty side-eye. I have to roll mine.

We fucked last night.I know, big shocker. Ren’s getting laid in prison. Alert the media.

I would have been fucking in prison regardless, because I love to do it; it’s my coping mechanism, and word on the street is that the one thing prison allows, in abundance, is sex. But when I found out the only way to get stuff in Alabaster Pen is to fuck people?

Well, ya girl rolled up her sleeves, cracked her knuckles and said, Step aside, boys. I got this.

There’s a new sheriff in town.

“Can I help you, muffin?” I murmur to Officer Peters, whose first name isJosh, by the way. He likes football, Italian food, long walks on the beach…Oh, and his dick is fuckinhuge.

He shoots me a surly glare—an expression that must be a stipulation of the job because they all pull it off quite well—only for a moment before he grumbles, “Just keep walking, inmate.”

“Iamwalking.” I grin.

He peeks at Joy, then leans in a little closer to whisper, “I have some things for you.”

“Appreciated,” I respond, feigning professionalism. “All deliveries are to be made between the hours of nine a.m. and five p.m. within forty-eight hours of the transaction. Late fees may apply.”

I snicker to myself, but Josh clearly isn’t as fond of my sterling sense of humor as he is my dick-taking abilities. He narrows his gaze at me. “Stop running your mouth, 48.”

I press my lips together.Jeez… What a grump.“Apologies, Officer. Sheesh, here I am trying to bring some light into this dark and dreary hellhole…” My rambling trails off when I glance right, catching his gaze zeroed on my mouth.

Ah, I see. He wants more.

Not the first time my services have been requested back-to-back. This place is so much better than the Edge. I’ve never felt more powerful.

“Tell you what?” I keep my tone hushed. “Come by after lights out and you can make two deliveries.”

I lift my brows to make sure he’s following my innuendo, which he definitely is. He doesn’t respond, simply gives me a curt nod, straightening and shifting away from me to yell at some inmates straggling. He seems like a good guy; quiet and stoic. He was a lot less aggressive last night than some of the others, which makes me think maybe it was his first time with a guy. I never see him messing with inmates.

Not like Velle. That dude slings dick on this island like he’s handing out candy on Halloween. But he’s by far my favorite guard to do business with.

I’m telling you, the way that piercing lights up my prostate…

My head is swirling with sex as we enter the cafeteria, meandering up to the line for food. Lex is a few dudes down from me, so I snatch up a tray before the guy behind me can take it, shooting him a warning glare.

“Move,” I growl, and he does, despite looking confused and put-out. Lex is watching me, and I nod him over, handing him the tray. “For you.”

He grins, accepting it. “Thank you, kind sir.”

Simmons tries to grab the next tray, but I smack his hand, picking it up myself. Lex chuckles while we walk over to our usual table side-by-side.