Page 26 of Fragments

I slept well, though I would’ve liked a few more minutes, but Joy is already banging on the bars to get us up for first shower. Fortunately, I’m able to sweet-talk her into giving us some more time, during which I let Dash use my toothbrush.

He doesn’t have one yet, and he’s being extremely whiny about it. I won’t say I don’t understand. I also love brushing my teeth, so I can sort of sympathize with his obsession. It’s pretty much all he’s been talking about.

We get to the showers as Velle is herding in a bunch more inmates. And before I can even look around, I feel fingers grazing my side. I flinch and turn, meeting light blue eyes.

“Missed you,” Ren whispers by my ear, sauntering toward our usual section of showers while lifting his shirt over his head.

My teeth grind together, and I blink hard, following after him.

Kang falls into step beside me, nudging my arm. “Morning, Luth.”

“Hey,” I sigh, whipping my shirt off.

Turning over my shoulder, I look for Dash. But I don’t see him. He must be attempting to get some privacy by using one of the empty showers.Rookie mistake.

See, you’dthinkgoing for privacy would be the best option. Less eyes on your junk, less proximity to other naked dudes. It’s certainly the default choice for newbies trying to prove hownot gaythey are. But ultimately, it leaves you alone and unprotected, which isn’t how you want to be standing around with your ass on display in this place.

Stepping up to the shabby concrete wall, I place my folded clothes on top and slam my fist onto the rusty button. Water flows from the shower head, and I let it hit me right away. The freezing cold water gives me a jolt that wakes me right the fuck up. Most other guys will stand out of the spray and wait for the water to warm up a little.

Not me. I like the sting of it first thing in the morning. It’s like a cup of strong coffee.

Peering right, I watch Ren dunking his head under the stream of water. It tumbles over him, drenching his hair and turning the typically very dark brown into black. He runs his fingers through it, lathering up some shampoo and washing thoroughly.

Not that I want to pay him any compliments, because he doesn’t deserve them, but he hasreallynice hair. I’m glad Joy doesn’t make him shave it that often. He definitely looks better with hair.

And even that rugged stubble he sometimes gets on his jaw in between shaves…

Closing my eyes, I redirect my thoughts to my own showering, which is where they should be. But showering doesn’t require any realthought, so they just keep wandering… back to the body over there, and the one in between us.

Kang is directly to my right, as he tends to be. Because I try to keep as much distance between Ren and me as I can in here. It almost feels like Kang showed up in Alabaster Pen just in time to become a buffer between me and Ren. Sometimes, I wonder if he keeps ustogether, or holds usapart…

Glancing at the two of them, I shake my head.Apart. It’s definitely best to keep us apart.

As I’m rinsing off, I can sense Ren moving closer, and my pulse speeds up like a physiological reflex. My gaze follows him as he slinks out of his own water spray, pushing himself beneath Kang’s. I swallow a lump in my throat.

Kang gives Ren a look, shaking his head subtly. Then Ren’s eyes move to mine. His head tilts, tongue sliding over water droplets on his lips. He doesn’t say any words, but I canhearhim. I fucking hate it, but I can.

I miss you.

I miss you so bad every second I’m around you…

“Cut the shit, Ren,” I growl, just loud enough that they can both hear me.

“It’ll be fine,” he says with a hand on Kang’s chest. He shoves Kang up against the wall with a soft grunt, eyes on mine the whole time. “It’ll befun.”

Without another word, Ren falls to his knees, his dark head of wet hair right in front of Kang’s crotch.

“Why are you letting him do this?” I snarl quietly at Kang, though my wide eyes won’t stop watching Ren’s tongue flutter over the tip of Kang’s rapidly hardening cock.

“He… he asked me to,” Kang stutters, eyes drooping shut, head tipping back against the wall as Ren’s plush lips suck him in. “Fuck…”

I gulp down a mouthful of saliva, my stomach twisting into a tight knot. “So, someone asks and you just… do?”

Slanting my head, I can’t stop staring as Ren bobs in front of Kang’s waist, sucking andsucking. It’s not even close to the first time I watched him do this, but it still looks every bit as fascinating to me. And I don’t know why… It’s not like Icare.

I honestly don’t think I’m gay. Despite everything I’ve been through here, despite the tension between me and Ren and the things I remember that put it there, I still don’t think I’m interested in men sexually. I just don’t… know.

But I recall what I said to Dash earlier.Lines get blurry in here…