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It felt like a shadow of doom passed over me as I stood, realizing what was happening. The baby was coming and there was no stopping it. I couldn’t naively refuse to go to the hospital out of disbelief that the timing was wrong. I knew I had to go.
This was all my fault. Everything I had put the baby through had finally had the most unfortunate consequence I had dreaded. I started sobbing as the guilt took over.
“This is all my fault,” I said, mostly to myself.
“Hey now. Don’t talk like that. No one knows how these things are going to go. Babies have their own timing and ours just wants to meet us sooner than later.”
Daniel pulled my hands from my stomach and gripped them tightly, pulling me to face him. His eyes were intent, but somehow calm. I found a fragment of relief in them.
“We have to go to the hospital now, okay?” he said, more as a statement than a question.
I nodded.
“I’m going to text Armand. He’s just down the street. He can take us.”
“Okay,” I said.
“Now, do you have a hospital bag packed?” he asked, the same steady calmness to his voice.
“Mhmm,” I said.
“Okay, let’s go get it,” he commanded as he typed a quick text on his phone.
He followed me into my apartment and I pointed next to my bed where my black duffel bag sat. It was the one Daniel had bought me and it was packed with all the essentials the baby books had recommended. He picked it up and slung it over his shoulder.
“You ready?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.
I wondered how he could be so calm. I also wondered what I would have done if he wasn’t here. I would have been a hundred times more scared than I was now. I didn’t know if I could be doing this without him. What a stroke of luck that timing would bring him to me at this exact moment.
“Yes, I’m just going to change really quick,” I said as I walked into my closet.
I peeled off the soaked shorts and took off my shirt and underwear before slipping on a fresh pair of underwear and a roomy dress over my head. I remembered something I read, so I ran to the bathroom quickly and put on a maxi-pad and grabbed a towel. Apparently, I was going to keep leaking.
“Okay, ready,” I said.
He grabbed my hand gently and we quickly walked out of the apartment and down the stairs. Edna’s door was open.
“Edna,” I called, knowing this would make her day. “It’s happening!”
I heard her slippers move quickly across the wood floor and saw her peep her head out. Her eyes bulged when she saw me and she clapped her hands excitedly together.
“Oh, my stars!”
“Wish me luck,” I said with a wink.
She gave me a warm smile and I swear I saw tears forming in her eyes. I didn’t have time to make sure because another wave of pain came over me, causing me to bend over again. They were contractions. More painful than anything I had ever felt. They put the Braxton Hicks to shame.
“I’m going to start timing your contractions,” said Daniel, pulling out his phone.
He waited for me to stand upright before placing his hand on my lower back and leading me to the door. He nodded to Edna, who watched us go.
Outside on the curb was Armand, who stood by the car with the back passenger door open. He looked nervous, but excited.
“Heart, it’s good to see you,” he said as he took my hand and helped me into the car, Daniel bringing up the rear.
“Good to see you too, Armand,” I said breathlessly.
He closed the door behind us and jogged to the front of the car, slipping quickly into the driver’s seat. I told him which hospital and he peeled away from the curb, faster than he ever had before.