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‘I... I’m so sorry. You never said.’
‘Is there any reason why I should have? Alice, I told you that I wasn’t interested in anything beyond what we have here and now.’
‘I know.’
‘I’m not looking for a relationship. I had one of those and I will never repeat the mistake.’
‘But what about love?’
‘Not for me. In time, when singledom becomes a place I no longer wish to inhabit, then I’ll consider settling down with a woman like me—a woman who sees the practical side to a relationship and isn’t looking for a fairy-tale romance. A companion, in other words, who is as practical as I am when it comes to the concept of marriage, or at least cohabitation.’
Their eyes met. What else was there to say? Alice was comfortable with what she’d done and, if inwardly he sneered at her for speaking what was on her mind, then so be it. Once she left here, she would never set eyes on him again, but at least she would leave with her conscience intact and no regrets about letting pride stand in the way of truth.
And at least she hadn’t made a complete fool of herself by going the distance and actually confessing just how deeply ran her feelings for him.
‘Well,’ she said with a tight smile, ‘just for the record, it’s been fun. My mistake for thinking we could have a little more fun when we got to London. I’ll go get my stuff together and I’ll be out of your hair.’
‘It’ll be dark in an hour. You know you’re welcome to stay here for the night.’
‘You’ve seen how experienced a skier I am and the snow is good. I can make it back to my side of the mountain. The girls have gone, but it’ll be easy to rent somewhere for the night, and I can change my ticket by paying a fee.’
She didn’t give him the chance to prolong the conversation. She spun round on her heels and walked away.
Mateo watched her leave the kitchen. His stomach was knotted. Of course, this was the right thing. He’d taken his eye off the ball and allowed things to get out of hand. She wasn’t like him. She lacked the experience to put things in perspective.
He thought about that soft, sexy body and sweet, sexy personality and tightened his jaw. The truth was that this was good for her. He didn’t want to hurt her and she’d be hurt if she stuck around, if they continued this when they returned to London.
Reality had no room for it—nothisreality. He couldn’t love, wasn’t interested in it, and it was always going to be better this way. He was never going to go down rabbit holes, so it was sensible to back away from their dubious, treacherous allure. So yes, maybe he’d felt something for her, maybe he’d had a moment of weakness because she’d caught him by surprise, because she was so different from his ex and every single woman who had come after his ex. But happiness was an illusion and he was way too cynical to trade in illusions.
He headed back out, back to the town. He’d get the cable up later when he knew she was gone.
CHAPTER FIVE
SITTINGBEHINDHISDESKin the impressive glass tower that dominated the London skyline, Mateo was in a state of shock. It was over six weeks since Alice Reynolds had disappeared from his life. He could recall that final conversation as vividly as if it had taken place five minutes before.
She had wanted more. She had wanted to continue their relationship when they returned to London. It had been a simple enough suggestion. As she’d told him, bemused and just a little bit pleading,they got along, didn’t they? And the sex was great, wasn’t it?She’d seen it through the straightforward eyes of someone whose life had never been complicated. Her back story hadn’t left her cynical, her emotions sealed behind doors that would never be opened.
Yes, she’d left a broken engagement behind her, but it had been obvious from everything she’d said that the solid security of her very loving and protected background had fortified her against any bitterness that the broken engagement might have generated. She hadn’t left her heart behind along with the engagement ring. She’d kept her dreams intact, emulating her parents, he expected.
It had been too much for him. He’d had to walk away. He might have given her the speech about not wanting commitment, but the minute he’d seen her pottering in his kitchen, comfortable in the role of his partner, he’d realised that those warning words had fallen on deaf ears. Even if she herself hadn’t realised it, she’d been well on the way towanting more.
Torn between desperately wanting her to stay and knowing she should leave, he had headed back down to the town and, when he’d returned, she was no longer there. She’d airbrushed herself out of his life and, typically, he’d reacted by spending the night in the loving arms of some excellent red wine.
In the morning he’d woken groggily to the realisation that there was no way he was going to hang around a minute longer in the lodge and he’d left for London on the first flight back.
That episode in his life was over. Okay, so there hadn’t been a single day when she hadn’t crossed his mind, and sure, his attempts at distraction with another woman—a six-foot-tall raven-haired model with a figure that had men walking into lampposts—had flamboyantly failed, but that was because what he and Alice had had had come to a premature end.
It was no surprise that his thoughts were still wrapped up with her because his nose had been put out of joint. He was so accustomed to calling the shots and ending things when his levels of boredom had been reached that to find himself on the receiving end naturally had left a few lingering remnants of bitter aftertaste. It wouldn’t last, and indeed it was quite amusing, really. It seemed his ego was bigger than he thought.
So fifteen minutes ago, when his PA had buzzed through to tell him that an Alice Reynolds was in the foyer requesting a meeting, he’d been gobsmacked.
And satisfied; he couldn’t help himself. Now, relaxing back in his chair with the busy streets of London sprawling twelve storeys below, visible through the massive sheet of floor-to-ceiling glass, Mateo savoured the taste of what was to come. She’d found out who he was. He had no idea how, but in this day and age sleuthing was easy. Maybe he’d left some form of identification lying around somewhere and she’d seen his full name.
It was disappointing that she’d decided to turn up, because he’d really thought that she lacked that materialistic streak that might let her see the financial benefits of dating a rich guy. She’d struck him as pure as the driven snow, the type of girl who really fitted the bill when it came to being a vicar’s daughter.
But he couldn’t be right all the time. She was here. She wanted to reconnect some way because he was a catch.
He would have to gently let her down. But he would also have a chance toseeher and he couldn’t deny that that was an exciting prospect.
‘Is there any reason why I should have? Alice, I told you that I wasn’t interested in anything beyond what we have here and now.’
‘I know.’
‘I’m not looking for a relationship. I had one of those and I will never repeat the mistake.’
‘But what about love?’
‘Not for me. In time, when singledom becomes a place I no longer wish to inhabit, then I’ll consider settling down with a woman like me—a woman who sees the practical side to a relationship and isn’t looking for a fairy-tale romance. A companion, in other words, who is as practical as I am when it comes to the concept of marriage, or at least cohabitation.’
Their eyes met. What else was there to say? Alice was comfortable with what she’d done and, if inwardly he sneered at her for speaking what was on her mind, then so be it. Once she left here, she would never set eyes on him again, but at least she would leave with her conscience intact and no regrets about letting pride stand in the way of truth.
And at least she hadn’t made a complete fool of herself by going the distance and actually confessing just how deeply ran her feelings for him.
‘Well,’ she said with a tight smile, ‘just for the record, it’s been fun. My mistake for thinking we could have a little more fun when we got to London. I’ll go get my stuff together and I’ll be out of your hair.’
‘It’ll be dark in an hour. You know you’re welcome to stay here for the night.’
‘You’ve seen how experienced a skier I am and the snow is good. I can make it back to my side of the mountain. The girls have gone, but it’ll be easy to rent somewhere for the night, and I can change my ticket by paying a fee.’
She didn’t give him the chance to prolong the conversation. She spun round on her heels and walked away.
Mateo watched her leave the kitchen. His stomach was knotted. Of course, this was the right thing. He’d taken his eye off the ball and allowed things to get out of hand. She wasn’t like him. She lacked the experience to put things in perspective.
He thought about that soft, sexy body and sweet, sexy personality and tightened his jaw. The truth was that this was good for her. He didn’t want to hurt her and she’d be hurt if she stuck around, if they continued this when they returned to London.
Reality had no room for it—nothisreality. He couldn’t love, wasn’t interested in it, and it was always going to be better this way. He was never going to go down rabbit holes, so it was sensible to back away from their dubious, treacherous allure. So yes, maybe he’d felt something for her, maybe he’d had a moment of weakness because she’d caught him by surprise, because she was so different from his ex and every single woman who had come after his ex. But happiness was an illusion and he was way too cynical to trade in illusions.
He headed back out, back to the town. He’d get the cable up later when he knew she was gone.
CHAPTER FIVE
SITTINGBEHINDHISDESKin the impressive glass tower that dominated the London skyline, Mateo was in a state of shock. It was over six weeks since Alice Reynolds had disappeared from his life. He could recall that final conversation as vividly as if it had taken place five minutes before.
She had wanted more. She had wanted to continue their relationship when they returned to London. It had been a simple enough suggestion. As she’d told him, bemused and just a little bit pleading,they got along, didn’t they? And the sex was great, wasn’t it?She’d seen it through the straightforward eyes of someone whose life had never been complicated. Her back story hadn’t left her cynical, her emotions sealed behind doors that would never be opened.
Yes, she’d left a broken engagement behind her, but it had been obvious from everything she’d said that the solid security of her very loving and protected background had fortified her against any bitterness that the broken engagement might have generated. She hadn’t left her heart behind along with the engagement ring. She’d kept her dreams intact, emulating her parents, he expected.
It had been too much for him. He’d had to walk away. He might have given her the speech about not wanting commitment, but the minute he’d seen her pottering in his kitchen, comfortable in the role of his partner, he’d realised that those warning words had fallen on deaf ears. Even if she herself hadn’t realised it, she’d been well on the way towanting more.
Torn between desperately wanting her to stay and knowing she should leave, he had headed back down to the town and, when he’d returned, she was no longer there. She’d airbrushed herself out of his life and, typically, he’d reacted by spending the night in the loving arms of some excellent red wine.
In the morning he’d woken groggily to the realisation that there was no way he was going to hang around a minute longer in the lodge and he’d left for London on the first flight back.
That episode in his life was over. Okay, so there hadn’t been a single day when she hadn’t crossed his mind, and sure, his attempts at distraction with another woman—a six-foot-tall raven-haired model with a figure that had men walking into lampposts—had flamboyantly failed, but that was because what he and Alice had had had come to a premature end.
It was no surprise that his thoughts were still wrapped up with her because his nose had been put out of joint. He was so accustomed to calling the shots and ending things when his levels of boredom had been reached that to find himself on the receiving end naturally had left a few lingering remnants of bitter aftertaste. It wouldn’t last, and indeed it was quite amusing, really. It seemed his ego was bigger than he thought.
So fifteen minutes ago, when his PA had buzzed through to tell him that an Alice Reynolds was in the foyer requesting a meeting, he’d been gobsmacked.
And satisfied; he couldn’t help himself. Now, relaxing back in his chair with the busy streets of London sprawling twelve storeys below, visible through the massive sheet of floor-to-ceiling glass, Mateo savoured the taste of what was to come. She’d found out who he was. He had no idea how, but in this day and age sleuthing was easy. Maybe he’d left some form of identification lying around somewhere and she’d seen his full name.
It was disappointing that she’d decided to turn up, because he’d really thought that she lacked that materialistic streak that might let her see the financial benefits of dating a rich guy. She’d struck him as pure as the driven snow, the type of girl who really fitted the bill when it came to being a vicar’s daughter.
But he couldn’t be right all the time. She was here. She wanted to reconnect some way because he was a catch.
He would have to gently let her down. But he would also have a chance toseeher and he couldn’t deny that that was an exciting prospect.
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