“I know, and I promise I can win over anyone who has doubts about us, foranyreason. Alright? Let me worry about that.”

I pull on a clean pair of jeans and then grab a nice button-down shirt from the closet. When I look around the room, I realize how much better everything looks. Dirty clothes are in the hamper, clean stuff is (mostly) put away, the bed has an actual sheet and comforter on it, and the nightstand isn’t cluttered with half-empty water glasses and food wrappers anymore. And Ben didn’t actually do any of it. Just by being himself, he pulled me out of the pit I was in. I can never fully repay him for that, but I know how I’d like to start trying.

“You’re already worried about keeping Annie here, and protecting me. I can’t let you take something else on,” I tell him, putting my hand on his arm and looking him in the eye so he knows I mean it. “If this is a way for me to show how much I care about you, then I’ll do it. I’d do anything for you, Ben. I hope you know that.” He kisses me, deep and slow and tender, one hand wrapping around my waist and pulling meinto him, while the other grips the back of my neck. I never want it to end.

“We are going to be late, my darlings,” says Annie, leaning on the door frame and watching us with a smile on her face. High-waisted, acid-wash flare jeans hug her hips and thighs perfectly, and she has on a blue sweater with a little white cat on the front. Her hair is already dry and falls over her shoulders in two braided pigtails. She looks fucking adorable. Ben holds his arm out, and she comes over to lean against him, taking my hand too.

“You ready?” I ask her.

She screws up her face and laughs. “I hope I can manage the same accent as before. What is our story this time?”

“You’re still Annika,” says Ben, “the exchange student from Sweden or wherever.”

“But, when we meet my friends,” I say slowly, unsure of how she might react, “I want to introduce Ben as my boyfriend.” Annie looks surprised for a moment and glances between us, then her face falls.

“Of course,” she mutters. “That is…that makes sense. Shall we go now?” She turns and walks out of the bedroom, folding her arms across her chest.

“Fuck,” Ben sighs. “Mi amor, wait!” He throws me a pained look and follows her down the hall, but I stay in the bedroom, my body suddenly heavy. I don’t know what to do for her, how to make her feel better about this. I’m not sure if I even can.

I move to the door and look around the corner to see how Ben is handling it. Annie leans against the kitchen counter while he stands in front of her, one hand on her arm. With the other, he points to his heart, then to her, then down the hall toward me. Every emotion imaginable flashes across his face as she replies and they keep talking. Hurt, fear, love, sadness, exasperation. Finally, Annie drops her face into her hand and Ben wraps his arms around her, continuing to murmur softly in her ear. He looks up and notices me watching, then jerks his head. As I approach, I see tears in his eyes. Without thinking, without considering the consequences, I wrap my arms around both of them and breathe them in.

34

Annie

“Annie, talk to me,”Ben says as he follows me into the kitchen. I lean on the counter and shake my head. There is a deep, hollow ache in my chest, and I do not know what he can say to fill it.

“I want you both to be happy,” I tell him, “even if it is without me. I just…did not think…I do not like this feeling.” I put a hand over the place where my human heart beats in my chest.

“What does it feel like?” Ben asks gently, threading his fingers through mine.

“Empty,” I murmur.

He touches my chin and lifts it so I am looking at him. “Mi amor,you really think I won’t introduce you to people as my girlfriend? Or whatever you want? Fuck, I’d tell people you’re my wife if it’d make you happy.”

I cannot help but smile. “Would Theo be alright with something like that?”

“We can ask him. Annie, I know you’re dead set on…going through with the exorcism–”

“I cannot risk her coming back and hurting either of you, Ben!”

“I know! I understand, trust me, and I’m gonna start working on a way to keep you here. But if you’re determined to do this, then I’m determined to make these next few weeks perfect for you. I don’t care what lies I have to tell, or who I have to tell them to, or what I have to do. I’m going to make you happy if it kills me.”

I raise my hands to hold his face. “That day in the park, you said that you think Theo is a bright light in a dark sky…but I hope you know thatyouare mine–my bright light in a very dark sky.”

“You’re both my bright lights,” Ben says, then he points at his own chest. “Me, and you.” He taps over my heart. “And Theo.” He waves toward the bedroom. “We belong together. I’m not going to letanyonetake that away. I promise.”

I look up at him, and the hollowness in my chest only expands.

“How can you promise that?” I ask, voice stumbling in my throat. I put my face in my hands and Ben’s arms envelop me, tugging me against his chest and filling my nose and mouth with his warm, rich scent.

“Don’t kill me for quoting scripture,” he laughs quietly, “but…‘love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things’, and I love you, so…I’m going to endure all things for you, Annie.” I lean against his chest and close my eyes, letting the softthud thudof his heart tame the coiling snake of anxiety in my stomach.

“I do not mind the quote,” I whisper, “and I love you too, Ben.”

A moment later, I feel Theo’s arms around both of us.

It is perfect, even if only for this moment.