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“Well,Ihave never seen rain before!” I tell them indignantly. “And I have always wondered…” I trail off, then turn back and unlatch thewindow, throwing it open. The smell hits me first, and I breathe it in with my eyes closed–earth and water, plus the crackle of electricity and the clean, chill bite of the wind. I have never felt anything like this, and I want to soak it into my very bones.

“Has it not rained at all since she got here?” Ben asks Theo.

“I don’t think it has.”

There’s a pause, then I feel Ben’s hands on my waist. “You wanna go out in it?” he asks when I turn around.

“Yes!” I squeal, but when I glance at Theo, he is frowning.

“You’ve still got the wings, Annie,” he says quietly. The bubble in my chest deflates, until he stands and grabs an umbrella from the coat hooks by the door. “But I’ve got an idea. Come on.” I grin at Ben while Theo unlocks the door and pokes his head out. He motions to us that the coast is clear, and we creep down the hallway to the stairs. This time, we go up, with Theo scouting ahead to ensure we do not run into any of his neighbors. We only climb two flights before reaching a metal door with a sign that says ‘Roof Access for Building Management Only’.

“We cannot go up there,” I whisper to Theo as he fiddles with the lock.

“The manager let Ros and I come up here sometimes, to do projects or spray paint things,” he says quietly. “I don’t think he’s changed the combination.”

The lock clicks open and he grins.

“Saint Theo, breaking the rules,” Ben teases, pulling him in and kissing his neck.

“Only for you two,” Theo replies with a laugh.

We go up the last set of stairs, which is metal and much more narrow, then through the door at the top. It leads directly onto the roof of the building. Theo opens his umbrella and steps out into the torrential downpour, and Ben follows, allowing the rain to soak him and closing his eyes as he turns his head up. I hang back underneath the shelter of the doorway, suddenly unsure if this is something I ought to be doing. Aftera moment, Ben wipes water from his face and comes over to me with Theo behind him.

“What’s wrong, Annie girl?”

“I-I was created from shadow and flame. I want to feel the rain, but…I do not know what will happen.”

“You take showers,” Ben laughs, but I frown at him.

“It is not the same! I was created for death and destruction and violence, Ben. Rain is something…pure and good. It brings life, washes away filth…and it kills flames.”

“Well that’s not…strictly true,” Theo says gently. “When there’s too much rain, it causes flooding…lots of destruction.”

“Yeah, and fire can be good too,” Ben explains. “It keeps us warm, cooks our food, helps us make metal. Even wildfires start regrowth cycles in forests. That’s kinda the thing about our world, Annie, and about humans. Very rarely is anything just black or white, good or bad…”

“You can be the same way,” Theo finishes. He closes his umbrella and they both hold their hands out. Tentatively, I take them and step into the storm, trying to shield my body with my wings at first. But the water does not hurt, as I imagined it might. It falls, fast and heavy, onto my skin, and simply rolls down. It is very much unlike my beloved shower, however, which is hot, gentle, and soft. The rain is cold and intense, hammering my thin wing membranes and quickly saturating my hair, but I allow it to soak every inch of me.

Taking a few steps away from Theo and Ben, I extend my wings to their full span, tilting and flexing them, relishing the way the muscles can stretch out here. I let my face fall back, close my eyes, and spread my arms too as the strange, giddy, bubbling feeling comes back into my body. Very soon, I find myself laughing, and my wings begin to move of their own accord, lifting me several feet off the ground, beating hard and sending sprays of water across the roof. I cannot stop them–or perhaps I do not want to.

“Annie!” Theo cries, taking a step forward. Ben grabs him around the waist, pulling him into a tight embrace, and I let myself rise through the deluge. When I am level with the tops of the highest city buildings, I turn my face up toward the clouds and do something I never thought I would.

“I know you can hear me!” I shout at the sky. “And I am not so proud that I will not beg for your help! I do not want to leave this place! Please–”

A flash of lightning illuminates the storm overhead, and a momentous clap of thunder rattles my bones. I cannot help but laugh again, then pump my wings relentlessly, climbing as high and fast as I dare, nearly touching the thunderheads themselves, before I let go, tuck my wings in, and freefall.

During the plunge, I close my eyes and imagine myself as a raindrop let loose from a stormcloud, falling to earth and feeding a patch of forget-me-nots, or filling the lake at the park–not being the droplet that causes a dam to burst, or washes away a family’s home. Theo and Ben shout at me from the roof far below, but nothing matters right now except the rush of the wind and water, and the heat of the lightning crackling across my fragile human skin. Alive. I feel alive as I never have before.

Not a moment too soon, a faint voice close to my chest whispers:Now!

My wings snap out, and I tilt them so they catch the air underneath, slowing me down enough for a rather clumsy, water-logged landing. On impact, I stumble, but Ben is there to catch me and I wrap my arms around his neck. Theo appears too, grabbing onto both of us and kissing the side of my head. I create a temporary shield against the rain by lifting my wings, then look up and meet their eyes: Blue and brown. The flowers and the soil.

“That was the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen,” Ben laughs.

“But maybe next time, warn us first?” Theo says breathlessly. I grin and nod, unable to find the words to explain what I have experienced. The way they are both looking at me, however, I think they already understand.

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Theo