Page 35 of This Blood That Breaks Us

My head hit the floor as we all bowed. I didn’t know what I believed or what I felt. That’s why they chose me. I was a blank slate for them to mark all over. A place to paint their story. My fingernails dug into my palm.

“Focus, My Love.” Her voice was next to me, and soft fingers cupped my cheek.

I was gone. Every sound and feeling fell away with Her touch.

“Focus,” She whispered again.

I wanted to please Her. I wanted Her to touch me. For a minute, I let go. The thought of Her took over completely, and peace finally found me. This was my home.

Ascension was coming for me.

I was powerless to fight it.

The prophecy was real.

It would be easier to let go.

That’s it, My Love.Her voice was in my head.

Why were we fighting this so hard in the first place? She was a goddess. Real. Vivid. And very much alive. Her blood was in my veins. I was made to worship Her.

“Look at me, and I will bless you.”

Before I could think or ponder, She bit into Her wrist and blood flowed in a river of ink.

I had to get out.

After Akira’s blood, I felt myself slipping. All that control I’d learned with Kilian became obsolete in the presence of Her blood when I could hear Her pulse racing. I pressed my knees into the floor, willing myself to stay, but my pulse grew louder as She moved closer. All eyes were on Zach and me.

“We are one.”

She reached my brother first. The blood on Her fingers resembled ink as She dragged Her fingers over Zach’s eyes, forming two lines.

The room was spinning.You have this. Just get outside.

She drew a stark black line from his forehead onto his nose.

I turned away. I was sure if I saw the blood touch his mouth, my control would slip. The taste . . .

If I give in, we’re all doomed.

I found my footing and resolve, then bolted. When the door shut behind me, I moved to block the entrance with my body and fell to my knees. I couldn’t believe I’d made it out.

“Are you okay?” Thane leaned over me.

I shook my head to gain composure, but it was swimming. The blood. It was so close. She was so close. The need gnawed at my insides.

Thane patted my head.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m proud of you. You kept it together. You didn’t give in.”

“How did you . . . ?”

“I can smell it. I remember how it felt when I had so much. And now I feel empty. I don’t know how much blood you’ve had, but the fact that you were able to walk through that door and shut it is something you should be proud of. I sent Will over there by the garden because he even felt it, and there’s a door between us.”

His words brought me the relief I needed to not spiral. Even Will felt it, and he’d never drank from Her directly.