Page 63 of Ruthless Chaos

He moves the collar of my shirt so that his warm hand is touching my skin. His palm and fingertips are rough. The friction kindles heat deep in my belly.

His other hand slides to my waist, holding me in place.

We’re too close, now. I hate how it makes me feel.

“Is that what you think, sweetheart?” he asks. Though his words are playful, I know this expression. This is the calm before the storm. “You think I’m a monster?”

He has the audacity to sound like he’s hurt.

Of course, he thinks he’s normal.

If you grow up in a world filled with monsters, you’ll become one without realizing. Everyone at Saint Frederic—no matter how nice they seem—is a monster.

It’s a prerequisite.

“Yes, I do.” I’ve made it this far; I won’t cower now. I hope I’m not trembling on the outside the way I am on the inside. “You’ve terrorized me from the moment we met. Only monsters act the way you do.”

Alexander smiles abruptly, as if I’ve complimented him.

His hand explores my neck.

I can’t stop myself from closing my eyes as heat razes my skin. His fingers make me ache for more. Is this what insanity feels like?

I know exactly how this will end. Yet I can’t seem to break away from him.

For all the mental anguish I endure after our encounters, my brain is silent now. I’m surviving on pure instinct. I don’t want to do what my body is telling me to.

I can’t.

“Your mouth says one thing.” He trails a thumb over my lips. His blue eyes are so dark they’re almost black. “But your body tells me something else.”

“No,” I say quickly, even as my heart starts to beat so loud I’m afraid he’ll hear it.

He scoffs, his thumb hesitating on the corner of my mouth.

“The first time we met, you were so wet from a kiss that your panties were soaked through.” I shudder. “I heard you moan when you had my cock in your mouth, and you swallowed every drop of my cum like a greedy little slut.” The blood drains from my face. He leans in closer, putting his mouth right by ear. “I’m sure your pussy is aching for me right now.”

My tongue withers. I don’t have words, only feelings—maddening feelings.

I turn my head away, but he jerks me back to face him. Our faces are centimeters apart. He’s so close that if I moved my head, even just a bit, our lips would touch.

“Tell me I’m wrong.” His eyes drop to my lips.

I’m too scared to speak. His mouth twists into a crooked smile.

He leans in and I feel the ghost of his lips on mine. I sink my teeth into my lower lip.

Don’t kiss him.

“Tell me who is worse, sweetheart. The monster, or the girl who wants to be fucked by one?” Alexander growls.

My mouth goes dry.

Don’t kiss him.

Would it really be that bad if I kissed him?

Don’t kiss him.