Page 10 of Ruthless Chaos

Though I’ve had the chance to for the past two years, this year feels like maybe the only year I’ll need one. It’s already shaping up to be the most stressful one yet, and I’ll need a reliable way to blow off the steam. I’m certain one of the incoming freshmen will suit the bill—a girl with a nice ass who won’t get attached because we’ll only have a year together.

We’re nearly half an hour into our trip when my phone buzzes.

It’s a text from an unlisted number.

Made it. Thx.

I know exactly who it’s from, so I delete it quickly.

Glancing over at my father, I see that the drive has lulled him to sleep. I smirk in the darkness of the cabin. I might not know where Graham went, but I did help him escape this life.

It was the least I could do considering how much he’s done for me over the years.

I still remember the first conversation we had abouther, the girl that made him do all this shit. He found someone who loved him truly, even with his horrible past. She changed him, and he felt like he had to change for her.

At first, I tried to talk him out of it. Deserting would make him a wanted man. There’s no way he could do that and live. Father would hunt him down and kill him in front of all of us. It would be the worst kind of death too.

But then, I met her, Ivy, and everything made sense.

It was like watching something out of a movie. They were in-sync to the point of finishing each other’s sentences. Graham had even taken up baking with her because she mentioned always wanting to do that with her boyfriend. Graham, the man who never followed instructions unless it involved killing someone.

It looked like the kind of love that made people do crazy things.

So, when he came to me a few months ago with the news that Ivy was pregnant I knew what was coming next. It was the only thing to do. Father would never let him date an innocent like her, much less let them have children.

Even if he managed to get father to agree to their relationship, Ivy and his kid would become targets. Just like our mother was. I can’t fault Graham for wanting to ensure Ivy doesn’t suffer the same fate.

I respect the choice he made.

Truthfully, I wish he was still here. Only because I don’t want to do this alone. But at least he got out. The fucker gets to live the life he deserves, and I can’t be upset at him for wanting happiness.

That’s all I could ever want for my older brother.

If I were in his shoes, I’d make the same decisions, I think.

Which is why I’ve resigned myself toneverbe. Love only leaves a trail of pain and devastation in its wake. It killed my mother. If Graham is discovered, Ivy will die.

Love always brings death.

THREE

ALLIE

“It should be around here, somewhere…”I mutter to myself, glancing at the printout I got from the Admissions Office. There’s a red X where my room should be, but this is the third floor I’ve been on that doesn’t have a room labelled 2502.

I got assigned to a dorm called Hemlock House.

I’m not sure what to expect yet, but judging from the way things look outside—it’s a huge old building that looks a lot like a castle—I’m assuming the rooms are at least comfortable. The flight has left me tired and thirsty.

I need to find my room soon. I can’t lug this suitcase around for much longer.

The halls are wide, with polished wooden floors so shiny I feel bad for rolling my suitcase over them. Subtle notes of jasmine and freesia waft through the air. Pedestals bearing expensive-looking sculptures line the hallways, with an enormous portrait at the end of each corridor. The traditional European décor reminds me of the Monaco hotel we lived out of for a few months when I was younger.

The memory makes me a little uncomfortable.

Monaco was the worst—the staff always mistook me for a trespasser, even though we were booked into the most expensive suite at the hotel. I didn’t let my father know because I was afraid of what he would do. In hindsight, I probably saved those hotel workers’ lives.

A door opens ahead, jolting me out of my thoughts.