Page 144 of Ruthless Chaos

When I’ve regained my composure, almost an hour has passed since I left the room in the basement. There’s a text from Alize on my phone, too.

She wants to hang out.

I text her back that I can’t see her tonight because of Kingmaker business, but will make time for her soon. It’s a very…domestic exchange that leaves me in a daze.

Especially since I’m actually a little sad I can’t spend time with her right now.

I take a shower, hoping it will numb the tornado of emotions, but it only makes things worse. All I can think of is having her here with me.

Maybe I should have insisted she move in with me. I can fuck her without falling in love with her, right?

I end up jerking off to the memory of her pussy clenching my tongue.

THIRTY-FOUR

ALIZE

“Areyou sure you don’t want to come?” Tara asks.

This is the third time she has asked, and my answer has been the same every time.

“No,” I say. I leave off the part that I have no interest in seeing other people get tortured. “It just doesn’t seem like it would be fun.”

Tara shrugs. She’s standing in front of her mirror, putting the finishing touches on her makeup. Though she claims she’s going to watch the Rush Week ‘festivities’, I have a suspicion she’ll be sneaking off somewhere else before the end of the night.

“Maybe fun isn’t the right word,” Tara says, using her pinkie finger to clean up the edges of her lipstick. “It’s interesting. To see how far people will go just to be a part of our sisterhood.”

Sisterhood. The word makes me want to barf. Sisters are never cruel to each other, and they sure as hell don’t sell the virginities of their sisters to the highest bidder.

Maybe Tara’s so casual about this because she’s already inducted, but I can’t be.

For everything I watch Cassidy, Liz and the others do to those girls, I’ll be thinking of what they did to me. What theystillmight do to me.

“I’ll pass,” I say, pulling my knees up to my chest.

Tara pauses putting on her mascara to look at me. “What will you do while I’m gone?”

“Well, I wanted to hang out with Alexander, but I guess he’s busy with Rush Week stuff too.” I fiddle with my necklace. “I’ll probably just get something to eat at The Pastry Shop, do my homework, then watch a movie.”

Tara looks at me pitifully. “That’s sad, Al. What a boring way to spend your night.”

I’ve given up on trying to convince her that it’s possible to genuinely enjoy quiet nights in. I guess Tara and I will always be opposites in that area.

“I’ll be fine, T. Promise.” I give her the most genuine smile I can find.

She stares at me for a long second, then returns to fixing herself in the mirror.

Tara slips out of the room soon after, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I spend the next hour tidying up our room—though Hemlock House has a maid service that deep cleans our rooms every two weeks, things still get a little messy.

I make Tara’s bed for her, stack her books on the bookshelf, and put her clothes where they belong—either in the laundry basket or in the closet. I do the same for myself, then give the floors a light sweeping.

I tackle the bathroom next.

I’m in the middle of organizing Tara’s skincare products when I hear my phone ringing. I rush from the bathroom, nearly tripping over the bundle of dirty towels I stacked on the floor. My heart roars in my chest.

I pick up the phone quickly, hoping to see Alexander’s name on the Caller ID.

Instead, I see Laurent Martin.