Page 13 of Cueball & Double-Z (Alpha’s Rejects #5)

I looked around my place and realized he was right.

I never thought about it. Once I started my life over, personal effects meant nothing to me.

Well, I told myself I was starting over, but it wouldn’t have been the first time I’d lied to myself.

It was human nature to do so when we weren’t ready to face reality.

Denial could be a strong force, eventually becoming a comfort.

It could be a great defensive mechanism, but it was only temporary, hindering the mind and preventing one from healing.

I took note of how things had been lately, that it was only a matter of time before I had to face my pain, and another reason I wanted to be alone.

Regardless, I could practically hear the clock ticking down—a time bomb.

I actually did have a couple of personal items. They were just put away, out of sight. “Yeah, I guess not,” I said finally.

“Living temporarily?” Zero asked intuitively.

It sure felt that way sometimes. I didn’t get a chance to answer, though I probably wouldn’t have before Zilch suddenly jumped in front of me with a big smile on his face.

‘I like it here.’

I raised a brow, seeing the plan forming in his head. “Oh, no. I said, a few days, Zilch.”

He put his hands together and threaded his fingers in a praying motion, using those big blue eyes to his advantage.

Little manipulator. Then he quickly signed, which he excelled at, showing his level of intelligence.

I bet he’d excel at learning other languages as well.

‘We can pay rent. This is perfect. Please.’

“He said, no, Zilch. Besides, we don’t even know this man.”

Zilch hooked a thumb at me before signing again. ‘He’s Cueball. We know him. He’s a good man. He warmed us up. He volunteers.’

“Zero’s right. You don’t know me, and I don’t know you,” I said, trying to head to my bedroom closet to grab them some things, but Zilch pressed a hand to my chest to stop me.

‘You see. You watch,’ he said, pointing at his eye. ‘You wouldn’t have brought us here.’

They weren’t moving in. I only wanted to help, not to be taken for granted. I brushed past him as Zero pulled Zilch aside to convince him they needed to leave in a few days. That was one thing Zero and I agreed on.

Ever since Aiden moved out, I’d been enjoying living alone again. In fact, I’d been seeing the Rejects less and less, slowly pulling back, never really feeling like I belonged. It wasn’t from a lack of trying on their part. That was all me .

I headed into my bedroom closet and pulled out some fresh towels and a spare blanket. I found Zero and Zilch in the spare room, unpacking some clothes.

I put the towels and blanket on the bed. “Here are some towels. As I said, we have to share the bathroom. Do you need anything? Spare pillows, toiletries?”

‘Do you have shampoo?’ Zilch indicated with his hands.

“Yes, I have all you need in the bathroom. Borrow whatever you want.”

I walked out of the room but stopped myself and turned around. “I know you had a late dinner, but it wasn’t much. Are you all still hungry?”

Zero pulled out sweats and a hoodie from his suitcase, not looking at me. “No, thank you.”

Even while he was still hard and gruff, at least he chose to be polite, which was probably more for Zilch’s benefit rather than mine.

“Okay, well… I’m headed downstairs to grab more of your things.”

Zero dropped his clothes on the bed. “I’ll help.”

“Let’s go then, before the snow gets too deep.”

He pulled the car key from his pocket as Zilch indicated that he was going to take a bath.

Zero grabbed his coat before following me out of the apartment. “Do you normally bring home strays?” he asked.

I jogged down the stairs with Zero close behind me. “Just once. He lived with me for a while before he met his boyfriend and moved in with him.”

“He’s gay?”

“Yeah, I guess. I mean, he likes his boyfriend, so he’s queer.”

“Are you?”

“That’s a bold and intrusive question, Zero.”

“Zilch is gay. I’m pansexual. I don’t usually advertise that, and while I’m not sure I trust you, you seem down with sexualities.”

I stopped on the second-floor stairs and turned to face him. “I respect all sexualities. You and Zilch are safe with me. While I may look big and scary, I won’t hurt you.”

Zero scoffed. “You don’t scare me.”

“If you say so. ”

We continued until we reached the bottom steps and walked outside. I nearly gasped at how cold it was, the snow stinging my face from the gusting wind. The harsher winter this year wasn’t typical for the area.

“I still don’t get why you helped us.”

“Because you needed it.”

“Lots of people need help.”

I was getting tired of these circular conversations.

“Yes, I understand that.” I turned to face him again.

“Look, I get the mistrust. You don’t know me.

Ever since you first bumped into me, you’ve been hostile.

I understand it’s not directed at me, so I don’t take offense,” I sighed, a plume of fog escaping my mouth.

“I don’t know why I helped you. Okay? There’s something about you and Zilch that calls to me, even with your mistrust and hostility.

Just like my friend Aiden called to me. He hadn’t wanted help at the time either. He was… a fucking wreck.”

Zero’s shoulders sagged, and he nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay,” I echoed. He opened the car, pulling out the sleeping bags and blankets as I grabbed a couple of boxes.

“We can wash everything once the roads are clear. There’s a laundromat about a block away. If you don’t want to drive anywhere, the subway stop is three blocks away.”

It took us about thirty more minutes to get all their stuff into my apartment. They didn’t exactly have much.

On the last load, I found Zilch on the couch, blond hair dripping wet, wearing an overly large T-shirt that fell off one creamy shoulder, playing The Last of Us .

He turned to face us, smiled, and waved before going back to his game.

I inwardly chuckled at how quickly he made himself at home.

That would have put some people off, but to me, it showed how quickly he adapted.

“Are you all warm enough?”

Zilch nodded, not taking his eyes off the TV, while Zero said nothing.

“For someone who has selective mutism, he sure doesn’t seem overly anxious,” I said to Zero, hoping he’d open up to me more because I was truly curious about Zilch.

“Cole.”

“What? ”

“That’s Cole. He’s my stepbrother. I’m Gio.”

“Nice to meet you, Gio.” I couldn’t bring myself to tell him my name. That made it feel like I was trying to get closer to them. I didn’t want that. They had to leave in a few days, and the last thing I needed was any attachments.

Gio didn’t enlighten me about Cole’s inability to speak, but at least he was opening up enough to tell me their real names.

Regardless, I had my suspicions as to why Cole wasn’t talking.

What started as trauma eventually just became a habit for him, like a comforting warm blanket.

A thought suddenly popped into my head, wondering if I could help him break that cycle. Get him talking again.

No!

What the hell?

No breaking anything .

Giving them a place to stay for a few days was as much as I was going to do for them.