Page 59 of Balancing Act

“You don’t?” Sarah asked.

“You guys have always told me that honesty is the best policy, and honestly, I don’t want you to get back together.” Lily uncrossed her arms as she finished her thought in one breath.

That familiar tug in her chest accompanied Lily’s words—at the way she had clearly been holding this in. She felt her pulse quicken as Lily’s words hung in the air.

“Lily,” Beth said softly, stepping forward and placing a hand on her daughter’s arm. “Why don’t you go downstairs for a bit? I think your mom and I need to talk.”

Lily glanced between them, frustrated, then left the kitchen without another word. The silence lasted only a moment before Beth turned to Sarah, her voice cool. “You bought ahouse?”

Sarah’s shoulders stiffened. “Yeah. I thought?—”

“No.” Beth’s voice cut through sharper than she intended. “You didn’t think. You didn’t ask me. You just did it, like you always do.”

Sarah’s mouth tightened. “I thought you’d be happy,” Sarah said, frustration creeping into her voice. “I’m trying to make things easier for us.”

“You didn’t ask,” Beth snapped, harsher than she meant to. “It’s always you making the decisions, assuming I’ll be fine with it. But I’m not, Sarah. Not anymore.”

Sarah sighed, softer now. “I’m trying to fix things, Beth. For us. For Lily.”

Beth’s stomach clenched. She didn’t want things fixed. She wanted things to be different—she wanted Jamie.

“I don’t want to fix things.” The words scraped their way out, raw and exposed, and for a split second, Beth wasn’t sure she had the strength to keep speaking. But she had to—there was no going back now. “This isn’t what I want.”

She remembered Jamie’s touch—not just on her skin, but in how Jamie’s presence had awakened a part of her that had been dormant for years. The comparison felt almost unfair. Sarah, steady and predictable, against Jamie, who made her feel alive, unpredictable in the best way. The relief came in waves, as if her body had been waiting for her to say those words out loud. “I need more than this.”

Beth’s chest tightened, a sense of clarity cutting through the fog of doubts she’d spun over the past months. She didn’t know if Jamie would ever be part of her future, but she knew, without a doubt, that it wasn’t with Sarah—not the way Sarah wanted it to be—and not now.

She spoke again, her voice stronger this time. “I love you, Sarah—a part of me always will—but not how you want me to love you.” She watched as her words landed on Sarah, her expression stoic and unflinching. Beth took a step toward her, sliding her hand into Sarah’s in a way she had done so many times before, but this time, it felt different.

“I love how you love our daughter, and I love what an amazing mother you are. I learn so much from you every day, even after all these years, and I’m proud to be your co-parent. I think what we’ve been able to build since the divorce—co-parenting and the friendship—is something exceptional and important to Lily, and I don’t want that to change. But I don’t want to go back to us. Not in that way.”

There was a quiet finality to her words, the gentle closing of a chapter.

Sarah didn’t respond immediately. She stared at Beth, her expression unreadable at first. Then, after a long, tense silence, she spoke. “I know.”

Beth blinked, caught off guard. “You know?”

Sarah’s fingers slid away from Beth’s, feeling like something invisible was pulling them apart in a more permanent way. It felt like the final step in a long goodbye that had been happening for years, slow and inevitable.

“I’m not surprised, Beth. Not really. I could see it. I’ve seen it for a while now. Since you got back from your tour, you’ve been somewhere else, even when we’re together.”

Beth felt a lump form in her throat, her chest tight with guilt and relief all at once. “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“You didn’t.” Sarah’s smile was sad, but there was no bitterness in it. “I’m Sarah Gallagher. I don’t get hurt, remember?” She laughed weakly, and Beth’s heart sank at her self-deprecating humor. Sarah had always been the type to put on a solid facade, even when hurting.

“I think we both knew this wouldn’t work again, but I guess I needed to try still, to see if maybe we could—I don’t know.”

“I get that,” Beth said softly. “But I think it’s time we stop pretending. I think it’s time we let each other go. For real.”

Sarah blinked away the tears that had begun to form in her eyes. “Yeah. I think you’re right,” she agreed softly.

For a moment, they stood there, two people with a shared history but different futures. There was no anger, no resentment—just the quiet understanding that they both deserved something more, something better.

She and Sarah had danced around this moment for so long, slipping in and out of old habits, but now, there was nothing left to say. No more chances, no more wonderingwhat if. It was over, and Beth felt a sense of peace wash over her for the first time. She had been holding on to the past, on to the idea of what she and Sarah used to be, for too long.

Sarah broke the silence first, stepping away and taking a deep breath. “I should probably go check on Lily,” she said, running a hand through her honey-brown hair as if trying to compose herself.

Beth nodded, feeling a tug of guilt. “Sarah?—”