Page 103 of Balancing Act
For a second, Beth thought she’d imagined it. She blinked, heart slamming against her ribs.I love you.Jamie had really said it—like it was the most natural thing in the world. Suddenly, the floor that had felt so unsteady beneath her earlier was beginning to solidify. Did Jamie realize what she’d said? Did she mean it? Beth stared at her, searching her expression for any sign of hesitation, like she had seen earlier, but she only saw quiet certainty. But how? “Did you...” she whispered, barely able to form the words. Taking a step closer.
Beth’s mind replayed the morning—the hesitation, the uncertainty. And yet, in this moment, there was no hesitation at all. And suddenly, Beth understood. Jamie wasn’t unsure of them. Just the step. But this—loving her—there was no fear in that.
Jamie turned slowly, her demeanor uncharacteristically nervous. “I did,” she said quietly, meeting Beth’s gaze.
Beth took a hesitant step forward, her pulse pounding in her ears. “Did you mean it?”
Jamie’s lips curved into the faintest smile. “I do,” she said, steady now. “I’ve known how I’ve felt for a while now, but...”
Beth didn’t let her finish. She was on Jamie instantly, her hands framing her face as she pressed her lips to hers. Jamie stumbled, her back hitting the wall as Beth kissed her fiercely, pouring every ounce of emotion she felt into it. She laughed, a little breathless from the kiss as she rested her forehead against Jamie’s. Her chest felt full, too full, like she couldn’t contain everything she was feeling. She’d imagined this moment before—wondered when or if Jamie would say those words—but nothing could have prepared her for how it felt. To hear it, to know Jamie meant it.
“I love you, too,” she whispered, her voice trembling around those four little words.
Jamie smiled, her hands settling on Beth’s hips as she tilted her head slightly, brushing her nose against Beth’s. “Good,” she murmured. “Because I wasn’t planning on taking it back.” Her smile faltered for a moment. “I still need to think about the moving-in thing,” she said softly, “but this?” She touched Beth’s cheek, thumb grazing over her skin. “This I’m sure about.”
Beth nodded, her heart aching in the best possible way. “That’s enough for now.”
She could wait. Jamie was already hers, and that was enough.
TWENTY-TWO
JAMIE
“Hi, Jamie. This is Jenna from Dr. Albrights’s office calling to confirm your mammogram appointment on Thursday, April 19th, at 2p.m. Please call us back if you need to make any changes to the appointment. Otherwise, we’ll see you Thursday.”
The voicemail ended, and Jamie pulled the phone away from her ear, a swell of panic rising up inside of her. She sat at the island counter in Beth’s kitchen, gray light filtering in through the floor-to-ceiling windows.
For the first time, the dreaded annual mammogram appointment had slipped Jamie’s mind. Usually, the mark on her calendar every year taunted her, threatened her with the possibility that time would finally catch up to her.
She instantly felt sick at that thought as she reached out for the glass of water in front of her, but instead of grasping the cup, she bumped it, sending it rolling across the counter before it dropped to the floor with a crash.
“Shit!” Jamie muttered in panic, as shards scattered, glinting under the light. She quickly lifted her computer out of the reach of the pool of water expanding across the counter.
Her pulse was racing, chest constricting. It was just a glass. But the sound of the shatter seemed to reverberate in her skull, growing louder and louder.
“Jamie?” Beth’s voice came from the hallway, light with concern. Footsteps followed, and then Beth appeared in the doorway, wiping her hands on the paint-stained apron she always wore while working in her studio. Her brow furrowed as she took in the scene. “What happened? Are you okay?”
Jamie didn’t look up as she set aside her laptop, hands moving to grab paper towels. “I’m fine,” she lied, as she tried to clean up the mess she had made. “Dropped a glass.”
Beth stepped closer, her voice softening. “Hey, it’s okay. Let me help you?—”
“I said I’m fine,” Jamie snapped, her tone slicing the air between them. She immediately winced at the sound of her voice, staying focused instead on sweeping the shards into a pile with her hand wrapped in a paper towel. Her movements were quick, almost frantic.
It had only been a week since Beth had asked her to move in, and Jamie had hesitated—not saying no, but also not saying yes. Things were still delicate between them. Jamie had barely been able to stomach the look of disappointment on Beth’s face, and since then, her stomach had been twisted into a permanent knot with the fear of continuing to let Beth down.
Beth stopped in her tracks. She could hear the concern in her voice when she spoke, which only made her guilt worse. “Jamie, you’re going to cut yourself. Let me grab the dustpan.”
“I’ve got it,” Jamie said tightly, her jaw clenching as she avoided Beth’s gaze. She knew how she must be coming off right now—tense, flustered, entirely out of sorts over such a minor accident—but she couldn’t seem to stop herself. Her hands trembled as she reached for another shard, and her stomachtwisted when she saw a tiny smear of red bloom on the paper towel.
Beth crossed the room in a few quick steps, kneeling beside her. “You’re bleeding,” she said gently, reaching for Jamie’s hand. “Let me?—”
“I said I’ve got it!” Jamie jerked her hand back, the words coming out way too loud. She stood abruptly, tossing the paper towel onto the counter. “It’s a broken glass, Beth. I don’t need you hovering.”
Beth rocked back slightly, her face shifting from concern to something more guarded. She rose slowly, keeping her voice calm. “I’m not hovering. I’m trying to help.”
“If I wanted help, I would have asked for it,” Jamie bit out, her hands bracing on the counter as she stared at the shattered remains of the glass on the floor. Every muscle in her felt like it was clenching, bracing for retaliation.
But it didn’t come, at least not in the explosive way Jamie expected. Beth just folded her arms, her expression carefully strained. “Okay. Clearly, you’ve got this. Sorry for trying to be helpful,” she bit back.