Page 18 of Balancing Act
“I disagree,” Amanda said simply.
“Of course you do,” Jamie muttered under her breath. “Am I, like, in trouble? This is starting to feel very boss-employee relationship to me, and I want to remind you that I own half this gym.”
“Not in trouble, but as the head coach here, I reserve the right to provide my coaching staff with feedback, and my feedback for you is to work on trust-building with Lily.” Amanda pulled her hair tie out, releasing the waterfall of flaming red hair over hershoulders. “God, that’s the best feeling, isn’t it?” she mused, as she raked her fingers through her hair.
“Mm-hmm,” Jamie agreed, already lost in thought.
Amanda was right, as infuriatingly perfect as that was. She had this knack for never being wrong, which grated on Jamie more than she cared to admit. She had consciously avoided trying to form any real connection with Lily, rationalizing that there wasn’t much point given she’d be off back to Oregon in such a short amount of time. But deep down, she knew it was more than that. Years of keeping people at arm’s length had left her questioning her ability to forge trust and allow someone else to rely on her. She had never wanted that level of responsibility to someone, not after everything she’d been through.
Then there was the complicated matter of Beth and their one-night stand, which she couldn’t stop thinking about, no matter how hard she tried. And she had tried her hardest.
She tried to box away those feelings for good, to label the incident as something that happened between consenting adults—nothing weird and nothing more. Beth had been clear about that the evening at the ice cream shop in town, and Jamie clung to that solid line in the sand. But as she watched Lily stretch below, the complexity of her emotions loomed.
“I can hear you brooding from here. What’s going on in your mind?” Amanda cooed lovingly, but in all seriousness.
“It’s nothing.”
“It’s never nothing.”
“Are you sure I’m the right person for this?” Jamie blurted out, before her brain could catch up with her mouth. “To work so closely with Lily? Wouldn’t it be beneficial for you to work with her one-on-one more than me?” Jamie couldn’t help the way her insecurities flooded her tone. She didn’t like to be bad at things. She was an achiever but didn’t feel like she was doing well at this. Maybe coaching wasn’t in her nature.
“Nope. You’re the best person for the job,” Amanda said, without further explanation. “I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
“Thanks for this impromptu performance review,” Jamie jabbed. She looked out at the gymnasts below as they sat in contemplative silence a few moments longer before she spoke again. “I need you to cover for me Friday morning. I have some stuff to take care of downtown.”
“I forgot how annoyingly cryptic you like to be. Everything is okay, right?”
Jamie registered the concern that laced Amanda’s words. “Everything is fine,” she reassured her friend. “Just getting some routine blood work done.”
“Okay. But I swear to God, Jamie, if you’re going to see Kendall, I will personally be the one to kick your ass. I know where you park your van at night. Remember that!”
Friday morning arrived quickly, and Jamie was running late. Jamie was never late.
“Last call for passengers heading to Seattle!” the automated voice blared through the terminal speakers, as Jamie hauled ass to the boat, her powerful strides barely keeping up. She made it, grinning apologetically at the deckhand as she stepped onto the boat and pushed her way into the interior passenger cabin.
The vessel hummed with a gentle, rhythmic vibration as the low thrum of the engine kicked on, and she had to steady herself as the boat jostled around, propelling itself forward on its journey across Elliot Bay. Jamie moved through the interior cabin, scanning the neat rows of turquoise benches for an open seat. Large picture windows gave way to breathtaking views of the vast expanse of water outside. The scent of saltwater,mingled with the faint aroma of freshly brewed coffee from the onboard café, lingered in the air.
As she walked up the boat searching for an empty booth, she spotted a familiar blonde ponytail ahead, the woman it belonged to leaning over something on the table. It was Beth. She was hunched over a small book—no doubt the same sketchbook Jamie had noticed her carrying with her in the gym the past few weeks.
On several occasions, Jamie had caught Beth watching her before she would hurriedly look away, pretending she hadn’t been staring. Jamie had found herself flattered by the attention. It felt good to be seen by Beth that way, and she couldn’t help but play into it like she had at the ice cream shop. But she knew it wasn’t right. Deep down, she knew they shouldn’t be looking at each other like that, not with the undercurrent of unresolved things that still remained heavy between them, and definitely not when Jamie needed to be focused on bonding with Lily. Sleeping with Lily’s mom was not the best way to build trust.
Jamie knew she had to kill the spark—fast—to ensure she could handle the upcoming months without being overwhelmed by her deepening feelings. She knew that given the slightest hint of a possibility with Beth, she would pursue it relentlessly until she got exactly what she wanted.
So, she concocted a plan. She would shift Beth into the friend zone in her mind. It was a simple solution, so evident that Jamie chided herself for not considering it earlier.
Becoming Beth’s friend was the ideal solution. Once she framed Beth in that light, the inappropriate fantasies—like wanting to undress Beth slowly, to explore every inch of her with her tongue—would have to cease. This was precisely why it was crucial for Jamie to shift Beth into the friend zone, and this could be the perfect opportunity.
“Is this seat taken?” Jamie asked, with a smile and an immediate rush of satisfaction as she noticed Beth’s cheeks color with a sudden flush.
“No,” Beth said quickly, her fingers snapping her sketchbook closed before shoving it back into her bag.
Jamie slid into the booth across from her, settling in casually. “You know, we might be setting a record for chance encounters,” she mused, a playful tone in her voice. “First the gallery, then the gym, ice cream, and now here...” Her voice trailed off invitingly.
“Yeah, we might be,” Beth softly responded, glancing out the window. “Where next? The coffee shop?”
Jamie couldn’t resist the opportunity. With Beth’s gaze momentarily lost in the distant view, she allowed herself a proper look at Beth—something she hadn’t indulged in since their night together. Over the past three weeks, she’d caught glimpses of her whenever she could, but those brief moments were never quite satisfying. Now, with time on her side in the quiet booth, she was determined to make the most of it.
Beth looked good. The way her jeans hugged her waist, cinched by a sleek belt, a black turtleneck layered under a crisp collared shirt. Jamie’s mind briefly wandered into the realm of fantasy, considering what it might be like to explore beneath each carefully chosen layer. However, she quickly returned to reality, shutting down inappropriate thoughts.