Page 48 of Theirs to Desire (Club M: Boxed Set)

ADRIAN

I can’t do this.

I thought I could. I hoped I could. But the instant I see the knife in Downing’s hands, the instant Fiona’s life is at risk, I realize I’ve been lying to myself.

I can’t watch another submissive die. I can’t lose another woman I care about.

We head back to our rooms in silence. “Adrian,” Fiona says hesitantly, “are you okay?”

No. I’m not okay. I’m going to break her heart, and mine as well, but I can’t do this again.

We enter my room, and I see the box containing the platinum cuffs I’d bought her. I’d been hopeful that day. Was it only last week? It seems so long ago. The box seems to mock me, and I turn away from it, from her.

Brody clears his throat. “That was unfortunate ,” he says, trying to smooth out the situation. “But Fiona’s unharmed, and that’s all that matters, right?”

No. It was my job to keep her safe, and I failed.

I failed Lina. I failed Sandy. And now, the deep pit of self-loathing in my gut tells me that I’ve failed Fiona too.

“I should leave.” Though my heart is breaking into a thousand sharp jagged pieces, my voice is steady. “I don’t think I’m ever going to be prepared to see you in danger, Fiona.”

“Adrian, please…” There’s a trace of tears in her voice.

A good dominant would hold her. Comfort her. Tell her how brave she’d been.

But I can’t.

Brody will make sure she’s okay. He’s picked up the pieces after me before. He’s used to dealing with my fuck-ups.

“I’m sorry,” I say, unable to look at Fiona’s face.

Then I leave.