Page 127 of Theirs to Desire (Club M: Boxed Set)

KIERA

I t’s beautiful here on Nolan’s rooftop. Below us, Manhattan is a tapestry of light, but up here, the noise is muted, and it’s oddly peaceful. There’s room here to think.

For so many years, I’ve lived my life in the past. A thousand times, I’ve replayed the events of that fateful evening when I went looking for my sister.

I’ve obsessively examined and re-examined every decision I’ve made.

Every action I’ve undertaken. Every mistake.

Every flaw. Over and over, I’ve poured over them.

I’ve lacerated myself with my failures. I’ve rubbed salt into the wounds of my heart, and I’ve refused to allow them to heal.

Moving on, when Bianca was dead, would have been wrong. Disloyal.

Then I found out that my sister was alive, and I’d been yanked back into the past again.

Three weeks ago, if someone had asked me why I avoided relationships and entanglements, I would have blamed Vladimir Sirkovich and the witness protection program.

There was always a chance that the mafia would come after me for putting one of their own in jail.

If they found me, I would be at risk. Under the circumstances, I couldn’t justify dragging someone into my life.

I would also have been lying.

It’s not Sirkovich that’s the problem.

It’s me.

I’ve never been able to forgive myself for what happened to Bianca. I’ve never been able to forget how badly I failed my baby sister.

Dixie has told me repeatedly that what happened to Bianca wasn’t my fault. Nolan’s said that to me. Caleb has too. I’ve heard their words. My head knows they’re right. But my heart has stayed frozen.

Then Nolan promises me that I will get a chance to talk to my sister, and Caleb steps in with words of reassurance that I’m not alone, and something unexpected and magical happens.

It all clicks into place. Peace descends over me.

I finally forgive myself.

If Bianca’s trapped with Martinez, Nolan and Caleb will get her out.

They’ve said they will, and I believe them.

But if she’s with him out of her own free will, then there’s nothing I can do.

My sister is an adult now. I am not responsible for her decisions; she is.

And as much as it kills me to watch from the sidelines, it’s her life. She’s allowed to screw it up.

I let go of the weight I’ve carried around all my life.

What the future holds, I don’t know. Only one thing is certain.

It’s time to make room in my heart for Caleb and Nolan.

We head back to the bedroom. “We can have sex in the morning,” Caleb says. “You don’t have to do this now.”

I’ve been stuck for eight years. I finally feel free. I appreciate Caleb’s consideration, but I don’t want to wait. “I want to.”

“Are you sure?” Nolan asks. He gives me a wicked smile that sends the butterflies in my stomach into a rampaging frenzy. He holds up the package. “You know what’s in this.”

I nod.

His smile grows. “Tell me what I’m holding, Kiera.”

Heat creeps up my cheeks. “A butt plug.” I swallow back my nerves. “I’m ready.”

Caleb laughs. “Are you now?” He moves right next to me. His fingers close on the hem of my t-shirt, and then he lifts it over my head. He crushes me into his warm chest. His fingers tangle in my hair, and his lips meet mine.

I stand on tiptoe and return his kiss. I can feel the hard, thick length of his erection against my stomach. Pleasure spirals inside me as his hand trails down my side. He wedges his knee between my thighs. “Spread them,” he orders, his voice thick and hoarse. “Spread them for me.”

“It’s your turn,” I protest. “I came already.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Are you in charge, Kiera?”

Oh fuck. There’s an edge to his tone that sends a shiver of pure lust through me. In real life, Caleb is the soul of consideration, and would never dream of barking orders at me.

But in the bedroom?

Things are different here. He might not wander around with a T-shirt that says, ‘Obey Me or Else,’ but Caleb Reeves has a dominant side to him.

A side that so far, I’ve only caught glimpses of.

A side that I very much want to see.

“No, Sir. I am not.”

His teeth flash in a predatory grin. “You’re right about that,” he agrees. “And because you’re not in charge, if I tell you to spread your legs, what do you do?”

I’m so turned on that my breath is coming in shallow pants. “I spread my legs.”

“And if I push my fingers into your slick, wet, heat, what do you say?”

I almost sob out loud; my need is that overwhelming. “I say, ‘thank you, Sir.’”

“Good girl.” He tilts my face up and brushes a kiss over my lips. I melt into his body, wrapping my arms around his neck. My boobs are crushed against his chest. My swollen, sensitive nipples ache and throb.

Damn that phone call. They’d been seconds away from fucking me. Now, we’re back to ‘Tease Kiera until she’s a whimpering mess.’ I’m not grumbling about foreplay—okay, I’m grumbling a little bit—but I want more. I want to feel their cocks inside me.

There’s a sound of a package being opened.

Nolan moves behind me. He moves my hair out of the way and kisses the back of my neck and the curve of my shoulder.

His beard rasps against my sensitized skin, and goosebumps break out all over my body.

He moves to my earlobe, sucking the tender flesh between his teeth.

“Do you know what I have in my hand?” he growls.

I can guess. “The butt plug?”

“Mm-hmm.” He kisses my neck again, and every nerve ending in my body tingles with heat.

Caleb’s lips turn up in a dark smile. “I think you should help Nolan. Spread your cheeks for him, baby.”

My cheeks blaze with heat. I bite my lower lip. I can’t do that. I just can’t. It’s too lewd, too wicked. I’d die from sheer embarrassment. “I…”

Caleb raises an eyebrow. “Consider your next words carefully,” he advises. “Is this a real limit, or do you just not want to obey because you’re embarrassed?”

Damn it. No, it’s not an actual limit. “It’s just… awkward,” I whine, giving Caleb a death glare.

His lips tilt up, but he shows no sign of relenting. “You have another ten seconds to make up your mind, Kiera. And then, there will be punishment.”

Damn it again. Blushing furiously, I remove my hands from around his neck. I can’t meet Caleb’s eyes. I grab my cheeks and spread them open for Nolan.

Nolan exhales in appreciation. “Fuck me, that’s hot,” he groans. Pleasure spreads through me at the raw need in his voice, at the undisguised desire in Caleb’s expression.

I’m sandwiched between two men. One of them has ordered me to spread my ass cheeks apart so that the other can stick a butt plug inside me.

I can’t believe I’m doing this. I can’t believe how turned on I am.

Caleb eases two fingers into my dripping pussy. “You like this, don’t you, Kiera?” he growls. “You might blush, and you might protest, but your body doesn’t lie. You’re soaked. Absolutely drenched.”

I cry out as his thumb grazes my swollen clit.

Nolan’s fingers move to the cleft between my globes. He teases the sensitive skin around my tight hole, and I inhale sharply as a fresh flood of heat fills me. “Relax,” he murmurs. He squirts some lube onto his fingers, and then he circles my ring before gently pushing a slick finger inside.

It feels… different. Not unpleasant. Sort of naughty, if I’m being honest. As if I’m doing something forbidden.

It’s sending all kinds of tingles through my body.

Caleb plunges his fingers into my pussy, Nolan plays with my ass, and I’m absolutely overflowing with sensation.

The room blurs around me. The world narrows to the feel of their hands on my body.

Nolan adds another finger. My muscles stretch to accommodate him. I whimper in slight discomfort. “Relax your muscles,” he orders. “Don’t fight me, Kiera.”

I take a deep breath and make myself calm down. There’s no pain; Nolan’s using plenty of lube, and he’s going slow. I’m expecting it to hurt, but it really doesn’t.

I don’t have much experience trusting anyone, but I can trust Nolan and Caleb.

Feeling me relax, Nolan slides his fingers in deeper. Another shiver runs through me. Caleb’s thumb circles my clit, applying the perfect amount of pressure.

Desire coils tight in my core. Surely, I can’t be at the edge again, already? Except I am. I’m so close. “I’m going to come,” I moan.

“No.” Caleb’s voice is very firm. “Not yet.”

I whimper out loud. Caleb arches an eyebrow. “Is that protest I hear?” he asks politely.

The first night, in his backyard, I’d asked him if he was going to spank me as punishment. I still remember his reply. If you don’t behave, I’ll take you to the edge, over and over, and I won’t let you come. No matter how much you beg.

“No, Sir,” I murmur meekly. Fuck me, I can’t hold this feeling back.

I grit my teeth and try to hold on. Try to ignore the shiver that runs through my body each time his thumb grazes my clit.

Try to ignore the heat that blazes over my nerve endings when Nolan removes his fingers from my ass and then eases them back, stretching me, readying me for the plug.

“Please,” I beg, my voice breaking. “Please… I need… I can’t…”

Nolan removes his fingers. I feel a cold, blunt object at my back entrance. “They make butt plugs out of plastic, and they make them out of steel,” he says conversationally, as if he weren’t at the point of pushing a plug into my ass. “Personally, I’m partial to glass.”

He pushes it steadily, and my muscles yield. There’s a brief second of discomfort as my tight ring stretches around the widest part, and then it’s in.

“Such a good girl,” Nolan says, his breath tickling my ear. “Would you like your reward now, Kiera?”

My throat is dry with desire. My body is burning up with need. “Yes, please.”

I can’t wait. I’m so ready. I’ve never wanted anything more in my life than I want them to sink into me. To take me.

To make me come.