Page 64 of Sidhe (The Incubus Saga #3)

“I am sorry, Nathan, we do not know anything for certain.” Walter shook his head, looking as if this mishap was somehow all his fault. “But it is possible that some of your recruits are in league with Malak.”

There was that sinking feeling again. Nathan didn’t want to rouse up suspicion though, not when he hadn’t even explained to all of the seals yet that they had both light and dark fae on their side.

“Be watchful, Nathan,” Walter said. “Do not act unless you are certain, but be wary of those you do not know, even those you believe you can trust. Oberon and Gwen are doing what they can to supply you with a true army. When they arrive, we will do all we can to help those willing to stand here and fight, I promise you that. Are you …willing to do the same?”

The question sounded tagged-on to Nathan, like that whole damn explanation had merely been an excuse to yet again ask if Nathan was finally going to man-up and ask Puck to take back his gift.

“What are we actually preparing for here?” Nathan asked instead. “Everyone’s starting to arrive, all these…soldiers, I guess, for this war, and we have no idea what we’re going to be facing. Is it just Solrin leading a bunch of dark fae across the lawn?”

Walter’s lips pursed tightly, his brow furrowing again with a troubled expression.

“I’m guessing that’s a yes, and probably more fae than I can imagine,” Nathan sighed, dragging a hand back through his hair.

“So we prepare for…everything? Every possible fae and power? How are we supposed to do this?” He didn’t really expect an answer to that question, but he couldn’t help noticing the way his Spirit Guide’s expression shifted once more, falling into place with that sad, disappointed look again.

“Choice is how this war will be won, Nathan, only through choice.” He looked at Nathan squarely again as he said that, his eyes shimmering, pleading with him.

Nathan said the only thing he could. “You’ll know my choice soon enough.

Trust me, Walt. I know what I’m doing.” And because he honestly believed that, believed in himself and his ability to make at least this choice even if he still doubted the choices ahead of him, Nathan was able to smile assuredly at Walter untainted by doubt.

The Spirit Guide’s head cocked further to the side and his eyes softened. “I have great faith in you, Nathan,” he said, which seemed to be the anthem of the hour.

This time Nathan didn’t argue.

Nathan only relayed the information of possible dark sidhe sleeper soldiers to those he trusted most—Sasha, Jim, and Alex. In the meantime, they would have to keep a closer eye on everyone else.

The twins had Nathan sit up on the roof feeling the pulse of emotions from everyone inside the Gatehouse, feeding specifically off of the affection swirling about the people that loved him. When he was focusing solely on that, it shocked Nathan how much there was.

There were large differences between feeding from affection and feeding from what Nathan really needed, really wanted , but the threshold was still there.

He knew he could keep from crossing it as long as he recognized it, and recognizing it was easy now.

He didn’t worry about possibly hurting Sasha.

It was this belief that assured the twins.

They pushed him back inside the Gatehouse, smiling secretively, only not so secretively because Nathan knew exactly what they were thinking.

He was thinking it too.

Nathan was plagued with plenty of other thoughts, the apocalypse being only too obvious a distraction. Part of Nathan just wanted to sleep, prepare for what he might have to do in the days to come, but he owed tonight to him and Sasha, he really did.

So when the twins released him and he snuck up to his and Sasha’s room—thank God they still had a room to themselves—he was pleased to hear the shower running, the door almost fully closed but left just open enough for light to spill out.

Nathan sat on the bed to wait for Sasha. His mind was so occupied with thoughts of what was to come that he might have dozed, even while sitting up, because the next thing he knew, he jumped at the sound of the bathroom door creaking open.

He looked over, pleasantly surprised to see a damp, black-haired man coming out in a towel he hadn’t even tied around himself but was carrying limply like he knew he should be modest but didn’t really care to be.

Nathan grinned when that towel slipped from Sasha’s fingers, him being just as pleasantly startled to find Nathan waiting on the bed.

“Someone sure looks pleased about something,” Sasha snorted, about to bend down and snatch up his lost towel before thinking better of it.

He stepped over it instead and walked assuredly to the edge of the bed, parts of his skin still painted in water, his dark hair plastered to his forehead, the strange sight of growing stubble visible on his face, as well as a dark trail leading down between his legs instead of tattoos.

Nathan groaned at the sight. “Feeling…pretty fantastic actually,” he said as he swept his eyes over that body that just unraveled him. “I finished my lessons.”

Color flushed to Sasha’s pale skin clear down his chest. “I figured,” he chuckled.

Nathan held out a hand to Sasha, still kicked back on the bed fully clothed. “Come here,” he said, allowing his expression to turn serious.

“Nate…?” Sasha asked as he took that hand and allowed Nathan to pull him onto the bed. Nathan pulled Sasha right to him, all that naked skin lined up along his own clothed form. Their embrace was intimate, but Nathan had something important to tell Sasha first.

“I want to tell the seals about the fae. Tomorrow,” Nathan said, one hand on Sasha’s back, the other rubbing up and down his bicep.

“After Shiarra and the rest of your friends get here, and a few more seals we’re expecting tomorrow morning.

That way everyone will know the truth and can make their own decisions.

We might lose some people. Might even have some trouble.

But I think…me being like this,” he glanced down his body, “…it might help. It’ll at least help me make a good point, since even some of the seals think I’m the freakin’ Messiah thanks to the talk going around.

” Nathan tried to laugh at that but he didn’t really find it funny.

Sasha smiled though, and reached over to grab the hand moving rhythmically up and down his arm. “And then afterwards…you’ll call Puck,” he said, not asking, because he knew, he always knew.

“Yeah,” Nathan said, not needing to explain the whys to Sasha, because he probably knew that too. “Doesn’t mean I don’t plan to work like mad to find a way to get you out of your deal, baby, you know that. I still want this. I want you .”

“I know.” Sasha smiled sadly, believing Nathan’s intentions but still looking like he had accepted in life that some things would never be his, including a happy ending.

“And it doesn’t mean you don’t want to try every aspect of being an incubus before we switch back either…

does it?” He grinned to banish that sorrow, licking his lips and looking at Nathan heatedly.

“Come here,” Nathan said again, even though Sasha couldn’t be more ‘there’, right on top of him really. But they coiled together, legs intertwining, arms tight around each other, and claimed a deep kiss that was only the beginning.