Page 13 of Rugged Hearts: Part One

“What’s happening? Why is your scent and others affecting me so much? Is my heat coming?” she asks softly, sounding so scared. I look back at the tablet I had put down and see that she’s twenty-nine years old. Gods, if she presented late and has been on suppressants for ten years she likely has never had a heat. No wonder she’s scared. I’m fucking scared. My omega is in serious danger and she doesn’t even know it.

Grabbing some tissues, I hand them over to her. I can’t just drop that part of the reason for all this is she found her scent matches. It’s too much all at once, even I can see that.“I can’t say for certain without running your labs, but I would say it is likelyyour heat will be coming soon based on the symptoms you filled out here. When did your suppressants end? Be honest, please.”

“They were supposed to last until February of next year, if they’re failing it’s four months early. Ican’thave a heat. Can you please give me another round of the suppressants?” She nearly begs. Her tone suggests that there’s more going on. Why does having a heat sound like such a nightmare for her?

I shake my head. “I cannot ethically do that. Also, I want the name of your previous doctor who repeatedly gave you suppressants these last ten years. They need to be reported.”

“No,” she blurts out. I raise a brow in question. She deflates a little when she says, “It wasn’t a single doctor. I alternated between my primary and the omega clinics. They didn’t always check records with your primary doctor especially if it was one of their free clinic days to help omegas in need of suppressants.”

“You gamed the system for suppressants.” I blink at her duplicitousness. “Why?”

“There were varying factors over the years. That doesn’t matter. What does is I’m alone in a new town. I cannot have a heat here,” Thea says, steeliness returning to her voice.

She’s right, I’ll find out the reasons for before another time. As much as it pains me to suggest knowing my pack is her scent match, I tell her, “There is an omega clinic just over an hour away that has heat services. You can sign up there and ride out your heat.”

She physically shudders at the suggestion. “Absolutely not. I can’t have my first heat with strangers.” Well I guess I was right that it’ll be her first heat. I never wanted to punish a patient like I do right now. She put herself in a dangerous position.

“Thousands of omegas do. You can’t avoid this coming heat. You said yourself the suppressants are failing four months earlier than expected. That is likely a result of your extended usage and their efficacy has waned. It’s all catching up now,” I say but omit my theory that meeting her scent matches may be speeding thisprocess up. I need to do more research on extended suppressant usage.

She shakes her head but doesn’t respond. It’s a lot to take in. In the meantime, I still have the routine exam to do. “Are you okay with continuing your exam today?” I ask, wanting to make sure she is still up for this. She nods, but that’s not enough. “Verbal consent please, are you okay with continuing the exam?”

Thea looks up at me, with tears slowly falling down her face. “Yes we can continue.” The next few minutes are filled with me giving basic instructions as I check her vitals and log everything down. She doesn’t say a word. Every now and then there’s a sniffle and my heart feels like it’ll break. I’m so mad at the situation but I can fix it. I’ll find a way to help her. Ihaveto. I haven’t communicated exactly why it’s such a big deal for the extended suppressant usage but she needs to know before leaving here today.

“Your vitals all look good. Before you leave, we’ll draw some blood so we can run the labs and get a baseline and projected date for your heat.” She nods.I then clear my throat to get her attention. “Before we do that, I need to make it clear about your situation.”

She huffs, that steeliness coming back. I should not find it such a turn on when she’s argumentative with me. “I know my situation, doctor. No need to go over it again.”

“Actually, you don’t. You know part of it. As you are aware, for suppressants there is a two years on, one year off rule. You gamed the system to work around that rule, which has more implications for your health than just having your heat come on due to failing suppressants.” I pause to gage her reaction, which is confused, so I continue, “Extended suppressant usage has negative effects on omegas’ health. I’m not talking about extra discomfort with your heat. Long term usage has been shown to be potentially life threatening. I don’t believe I’ve seen or read a case that was ten years. The longest I remember was six years and theomega had to be hospitalized during her entire heat and even then, she almost didn’t make it.”

“That’s—that can’t happen to me. I didn’t know, there was never the right time for my heat,” she says quickly then quietly I almost miss it. “He was right.” And that’s when the slow trickle of tears she’s been crying turns into a full-on sob.

Fuck professionalism, she needs to be comforted. I stand up and put my arm around her shoulder, squeezing tightly, letting her know I’m here. She turns and leans into my chest, crying. I wrap my other arm around her and hold her through this. I’m going to find a way to fix this. We can’t have found our scent match, a once in a generation chance, and lose her immediately. No, that is not happening on my watch. My mind is already going through any and all medical journals and research I can remember. I may have to call a friend from my days at the hospital and see if I can use their library.

After a while her sobs quiet down to sniffles and then she pulls away. I had migrated to sitting with her on the exam chair and rubbing her back as she cried.“I’m so sorry—” she begins before I cut her off.

“Y-you have nothing to apologize for. It’s a lot to take in. Here’s what we’re going to do. I will draw your blood and we’ll run the labs we discussed. Then in between patients and after hours I will be researching everything I can find to help you through this heat as safely as possible. Sound like a plan?” I need to be strong for her.

“Yeah sounds like a plan.” Her voice wobbles, and she tries and fails to give me a watery smile.

The remainder of the appointment happens in relative silence while I take her blood and get the labs going. I check on Thea one last time before she leaves. Her face is still flushed and eyes red from crying but otherwise dry from any evidence of tears. She’s dressed again, though it’s my first time seeing her outside of the shapeless medical gown she was in. She isbreathtaking. She’s wearing a retro style skirt with a knit sweater half tucked in, bothclinging to her curves at her waist and hips. My eyes trail down, seeing her thick thighs peeking through the skirt then down to her little ankle boots. Even with the situation as it is, I can’t help but feel like the luckiest alpha.

I give her a reassuring smile, or as best as I can manage, and say, “I will call you when I have the results of the labs and the research regarding the heat.”

13

THEA

I’m numb and feeling too much all at the same time as I leave the doctor’s office. My shift at the lodge starts in an hour so I don’t have much time to pull myself together. I don’t remember the drive home or the quick change into my work clothes, and suddenly, I find myself already parked at the lodge and frozen in my seat, unable to move now that I’m here. I can’t deal with a heat, an apparently complicated heat, on top of everything else. My thoughts are going in twenty different directions, but I can’t let them distract me. I have to get through work, if I give them an inch I’ll fall apart like I did with the doctor.

A wave of embarrassment washes over me. I can’t believe I broke down like that with him. And what was with his scent? Pine. So strong you think I was in the middle of a forest. I swear it made me go temporarily insane. I’ve lied and gotten suppressants when I shouldn’t have many times but being surrounded by his scent makes my brain wander and I end up blurting out the first thing that pops in my head. I do know he’s right though, that taking more suppressants likely wouldn’t have done anything especially if they’re failing months early. I did look up online quickly to see if long-term suppressant use really is life threateningand what I read quickly did confirm it; not that I didn’t believe him.

Shaking my head, I check my reflection in the rearview mirror. The redness around my eyes has gone down some but it’s still obvious I was upset at some point this morning. I just need to punch in, check the supplies on the cart and which cabins need servicing, and then I’ll basically be alone for the rest of the day. Part of me wishes that park ranger alpha was nearby. I could use that sense of peace his scent seemed to trigger.

Keeping my head down as I meander through the lodge, I punch in quickly and check my cart.Of courseI need some supplies from the upstairs storage. As quickly as possible, I grab what I need and head back down but not before running into Ben. My hands are full but thankfully I don’t drop anything. His scent hits me first and some of the tension I’ve been holding onto melts away, just a little. I mumble a good morning and rush down the stairs, not concerned if he thinks I’m rude since I just can’t handle talking to anyone right now. When I get to the bottom, I can’t help but look up and him still standing there. Shock is written all over his face as he looks at me. It’s almost like he’s seeing through me. Not my business, maybe he’s having a bad day too.

It isn’t until I’m in the middle of servicing the first cabin that I realize what could’ve surprised Ben. I forgot to put descenter on. I didn’t put it on before the doctor’s appointment since most doctors prefer to be able to scent their patients. At least that’s what I was always told, something about it making them more responsive to any changes. I don’t really understand how it all works but scent is a big part of our health and how we interact every day so I guess there’s some logic to it. Thankfully I keep a travel size in the cart and reapply before continuing with my day. Who cares if he scented me? I’m an omega, I didn’t lie about my designation when I was hired. I just don’t go out of my way to advertise it.

The rest of the day goes by in a blur. I ate a quick lunch in mycart before continuing with today’s service. There’s one cabin left, Andromeda. It’s next to the one that’s closed down for the season. I’m slower as I work this last cabin, feeling the fatigue of this morning pulling on me. I swear one look from someone will probably cause me to burst into tears. Which honestly pisses me off. I don’t want to cry. I can’t afford to. Even thinking about it I feel my eyes water. Rolling my eyes at myself, I pick up my pace and finish the cabin. Now sitting in my cart after I’m done for the day, I just stare out at the woods. There’s more leaves on the ground than the trees now. How quickly things have changed in a few short weeks. I can’t help but see the parallel. Everything looked so pretty and bright a few weeks ago and now the bare trees and dead leaves on the ground mock me.