Page 1 of Never To Suffer (The Hollywoodland #4)

TO ALL THE ONES THAT I LOVE

PRESS CLUB

The obnoxious flyer on the walls of the preppy coffee shop yells at me the minute I see it.

Is your band good enough to be the next megastar headliner?!

I read it over and over again, building my confidence each time until I’m screaming YES!

in my mind. We’re ready for fame to throw its arms open and invite us to play for the gods and goddesses of Olympus.

For the world to cheer our names and wear our merch.

We were born for this, for stardom, tours, and fans.

Or, that’s what I’m standing here trying to convince myself to believe.

Am I sure we’re ready to let that fickle bitch embrace us before turning her back on us for the next new, shiny thing?

Can we handle going so big, we spend every minute on tour or sitting for interviews on global television and podcasts?

Would we survive touring with each other non-stop for months at a time?

Am I ready to drop everything I know and love to make the leap into uncertainty? I have no idea, but I’d like to give it a try.

“What’s got your attention? Please tell me it’s not another psychic convention or whatever they’re called.

” My girlfriend checks the reflection of her hair in the window next to me, even though I’ve assured her the braids still look fine after our make-out session in the bathroom.

She used to trust me, but we’ve been clinging to a dying relationship for weeks now.

Or maybe it’s me ignoring the red flags she waves in my face.

Either way, one of us will break soon enough.

We’ve got too much crackling energy between us and not the positive, fun kind.

Every card I pull over the last two weeks has been a warning to let things go, but I’m stubborn.

Okay, I’m controlling. Whatever.

She smears my gloss over her pouty lips before thrusting the tube in my direction. She refuses to use my lip gloss after me if I’ve gone down on her.

So. Many. Red. Flags.

“It’s for a contest.” I nod to the flyer, refusing to break over cosmetics.

I pull my phone out of my purse and snap a picture so I can upload it to the group chat.

They’ll laugh and tell me I’m crazy for thinking we could handle that kind of competition.

But it could push us to get out of Connor’s storage unit and into a real studio.

Leave the small bars behind for actual venues.

If we give ourselves a chance, nothing can hold us back.

Nothing but ourselves.

And maybe Rory, our bassist.

“You’re not seriously thinking of entering that, are you?

” Megan squints and leans close as if she doesn’t have perfect eyesight.

She loves drama, which makes the film industry the perfect career for her when she’s on a gig.

“Dani, that’s a lot of money for an entry fee.

We just moved into hell on earth because we’re broke and you want to do this ? ”

“What are you talking about? Our awesome apartment? Right in the middle of?—”

“A dump?”

“Whatever. The view?—

“Of a billboard that’s lit the fuck up twenty-four-seven?”

“Fine, okay, the apartment sucks. But maybe this could help? Look here, they’re covering all the marketing, booking all the venues, and, if you make it to the top ten, they’ll cover all travel expenses after that. That’s totally worth the entry fee!”

I’ve read the poster at least ten times now, and each time, the adrenaline rushes through me, my toes tingle, and I bite back the grin.

Our big chance right there on a flyer tacked to a wall of a coffee shop.

My fingers are begging me to rip it down so no one else finds out about it, but the big, cartoonish logo of a chimp in a backward baseball hat reminds me this isn’t an event you publicize on a bus stop or two.

We’re talking billboards on Sunset Boulevard levels of big.

NotOkay Records has the pull and the money to put together something like this, something raw and untested.

This isn’t like those stupid auto-tuned contests on TV. Live, baby!

That terrifies me, and I swallow back the bile rising in my throat.

Odds are super in their favor that the contest will grow into a multi-billion-dollar music empire reality competition, like the singing one did years ago.

Bands from everywhere competing against each other for a ticket, humiliating themselves in the process of selling out.

The first year, though? That's when everything they do has one foot in reality, still about the music and the magic and not the money.

The prize payout for the top three doesn’t suck though. I’m not above saying I’m in it for fame, fortune, and glory. I’m just saying I’m also in it for the music.

“Dani?!” I’m yanked out of my daydream so fast my vision blurs for a moment until I focus on Megan’s scowl. “They’ve called your name like five times now. Are you going to get your coffee, or what?”

“After what I did to you in the bathroom, you could have grabbed it for me, babe .”

Three. Orgasms.

That’s how my girlfriend starts her day. I start my day getting bitched at because I won’t leave my boyfriend, and I daydream too much. Ugh. She used to be fun when we first met.

“Whatever. Get your coffee. I need to go, or I’ll be late for my interview.” She gives me a peck on the cheek. Even that feels cold. We’re still together out of spite more than anything else. “Stop it, babe. Stick to your day job.” She stops and juts out a hip. “How do I look?”

“Hot,” I groan. “It’s only Rory. I’m not sure why you’re going all out on looks, since she’s basically already hired you.”

“I want to look, you know, professional.” I give her another look and bite back a laugh.

Since when do professionals for an accounting firm wear short skirts and display mega cleavage?

She crosses her arms and growls. “It’s a decent job, Dani, and until I find another PA spot, or your lazy ass dickhead boyfriend gets an actual job, we need it. ”

My fingers flex as if I have retractable claws that are ready to come out.

“Oh, don’t get all defensive. I don’t mean it about Xander. I mean, I do, but I don’t.” She tries to play with my hair, but I pull away. “Fine. But think about what I said, okay? You don’t need him in your?—”

“Okay, wonderful. I’ll see you at the bar after rehearsal tonight!

” The fake smile hurts my face, but that’s what she wants.

The second she turns her back; I flip her off and stick out my tongue before I head to the counter for my coffee.

My phone chirps while I’m racing to the vacant corner table before someone grabs it.

Even in my chunky platform boots, I get to the table and slip into the seat seconds before another woman.

Finally, something goes right this morning.

Before I get to the messages on my phone, I set up my office for the day.

I hang up my lime green and orange puffy coat on the back of my chair, position my laptop to avoid a glare, and check to see if I should add another hole to my hot pink fishnets.

Once I’m finally settled and get that first sip of coffee, I start my day.

I’m not surprised the messages are all from my boyfriend, Xander.

Xanadu

Hey, did you see this? You gotta do this! Seriously, I’ll fucking rob a bank or whatever so you can enter!

[IMAGE ATTACHED]

The flyer about the battle of the bands competition loads on my screen and this time my smile refuses to hide. The differences between my boyfriend and my girlfriend could fill a novel longer than Stephen King’s IT. But Xander and I have been together since high school, and I love the little shit.

Don’t say shit like that, the g men will put you on a list!

And yeah. I saw it this morning and sent it to the band.

Xanadu

Oh, you think I’m not already ON a list? I’m probably on hundreds of lists at this point!

Most of them are subscription lists for porn sites, but whatever! What did the band say?

I haven’t checked.

Do you really think it’s a good idea to sign up? It’s so much money.

Xanadu

No. No, it's a terrible idea. YES, I THINK IT’S A GOOD IDEA!

I’ll pick up some side work to help you raise the money.

Tell Connor to send me the breakdown once he has it done, cause I know that math loving fucker is crunching numbers right now.

You know, Connor’s kind of hot. Hotter than Megan.

He’s seeing someone. Sorry.

My phone rings and I tuck it between my ear and shoulder.

“What did I do wrong?” Xander asks before I can answer.

“What? Nothing.” I check the calendar and respond to anything marked as urgent from Sam, my boss. “Why?”

“Because you didn’t give me shit for saying we should bang Connor. Also, should you enter? Where’s this negative bullshit coming from? Wait, don’t tell me. Megan?”

I bite my lip and look up at the ceiling, blinking rapidly so I don’t ruin my makeup, which looks fucking flawless today.

I got excited when Megan invited me out to coffee this morning after we woke up.

I even put my cute skirt on, the one she loves because it has this frilly edging she can play with.

It’s why I pulled her into the bathroom to make out, one last shot at making this work.

But on that last orgasm, it wasn’t my name she moaned.

Oh, Rory! Right there!

“Xander, should we be worried about this interview? About Megan and Rory?”

“Our triad isn’t functional, D. So, if you need to ask ? —”

“I get it.” I try to shake it off. “Uhm, can we talk about it later? Sam has some stuff I need to work on this morning, and I’m just getting settled in at the coffee shop.”

“Hey, Beetle?” There’s a brief pause filled with the sound of his sigh.

It’s not frustrated or annoyed like Megan’s are.

Instead, it’s full of longing and hope for us to move on, to embrace the future.

“I don’t care what she said or did, you’re fucking incredible.

You set your boundaries and your trust, and she’s broken both more than you want to admit.

Now, you’re entering this competition. You deserve it.

Hell, you deserve the world, Dani. I wish I could give it to you. ”

“You already do, Xan.”

“I wanna break up with Megan. Wanna help me dance her out of my system at a club tonight or maybe make out?” I’m sitting on my friend’s kitchen counter, avoiding going home while I pretend to work. I shovel more of their leftover Chinese food into my face as I stare at the website from the flyer.

“I told you she’s gotta go, and you know I’d normally be down, but I can’t tonight. It’s date night,” Alexis answers as she walks behind me to see if I’ve left any food for her.

“Girl, you’re married.”

“Yeah, for two blissful years. And we still have date nights where we make out like teenagers, giggling and trying not to get caught.” She grabs a bite of the half-eaten egg roll and puts the rest in the container I’m eating out of before nodding to my screen. “What’s that hideousness?”

Are You Ready to ROCK?! The words scroll across the screen in a garish font and neon colors.

“Band contest. I’m thinking about entering, but it’s huge and I don’t know if we’re exactly ready to rock .”

“Cheap bastards can’t even hire real designers, and you’re worried you’re not qualified to win?” Alexis hisses as she reads over my shoulder. “Smash that god awful apply button so we can get off this website. My eyes are bleeding!”

“Hold on, I’m reading the rules!” I scan the page, looking for the keywords to tell me this is all a hoax.

“The first gig kicks off a week-long music festival outside Portland. When it’s over, they’ll take the top twenty-five bands on a crazy-ass national tour, eliminating a band at every stop. Harsh, but epic.”

“Sounds like something you and your people will crush.” She hands me her credit card and grabs the container of rice. “Put it on here. I need to hop on a call with a client.”

I hold up the credit card as I open the group chat, expecting them to bring me back to reality.

Connor

YES! I’M IN! Where? When? FUCK IT DON’T CARE!!! LET’S DOOOOO THIS!!

Rory

I’m not sure I can get that kind of time off, but I can negotiate something if I need to.

Connor

Fire! I’ll borrow my brother’s whip and we’ll go in styleeeee!! We gotta do this!!!!!! Pleaaaase? Band road trip?

Noah

His whip? You’re fucking delulu. He drives a minivan!

But yeah, I’m down. Wait, can we afford this?

Connor

We so can. I did the maths. We should get some sponsors . Fuck, this is gonna be so

They’re onboard. I can’t believe what I’m reading.

Who are you people and what have you done with my band?!

I’m submitting everything now before we change our mind!

In two weeks, we’ll find out if we really are good enough.