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TJ

Around four-thirty, Jimmy came into the kitchen, where I was unpacking glassware into the cabinet above the dishwasher. Our friends had left about an hour before and I’d resumed unpacking the kitchen, while Jimmy had gone into the bedroom to make the bed and start unloading his clothes.

He came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing the back of my neck. “Bed’s made.”

I turned in his arms, placing my hands on his hips and smirking at him. “You wanting to christen the bedroom?”

“Mmm. I definitely want to do that…but later.” He stepped back, taking my hands in his. “Take a walk with me?”

“Alright.” I wasn’t sure what he was after, but he seemed determined, and there was nothing sexier than when Jimmy got that glint in his eye.

We grabbed our jackets and headed out the back door, walking through the yard to the line of trees at the edge of the property. As we got closer to the woods, I could see a small path that ran parallel to the tree line and we followed it, heading west toward the sun, now hanging low in the sky.

As we turned onto the path that would take us into the forest, I zipped up my coat, warding against the late-October chill. I’d been plenty warm earlier in the day as we’d done the labor of moving boxes and furniture, but in the shade of the trees with the sun slipping lower in the sky, I was glad we’d tugged on our jackets.

Jimmy grabbed my hand, pulling me along the path, our feet crunching the leaves lining the trail. The foliage was thinner this time of year, with some leaves still stubbornly clinging to branches and others blanketing the forest floor in preparation for winter.

I was pretty sure I knew where we were headed, though I hadn’t been on this particular branch of the trail, but I was curious to know why. Was this just a walk down memory lane? If so, why did it feel monumental in some way?

We came to a fork in the path and took a left, continuing in companionable silence, the crackle of dried leaves rustling in the breeze providing the soundtrack. A short time later, I began to recognize landmarks along the trail, further confirming my suspicions of where we were headed.

“That boulder there is where Will proposed to Sammy.” He gestured to the large rock formation as we passed. “It was always their spot, even as kids.”

“What about us, sunshine? Is ours down by the creek?”

One corner of his mouth tipped up. “What do you think?”

I smiled and shook my head at his sass, and we kept walking.

When we arrived at the little clearing next to the creek bank, we sat near the water, though we kept our socks and shoes firmly on our feet. This time of year, the water would be much too cold to dip our toes.

“Have you been here since you moved back?”

We were sitting shoulder to shoulder with our knees pulled up, arms wrapped around them. “Once. The week before the bonfire. I was trying to get up the courage to reach out to you.”

His eyes snapped to mine. “Why did you need courage?”

“I was nervous. Why do you always doubt the effect you have on me?” I raised my brow in challenge.

“I’m working on it,” he grumbled.

I chuckled and tilted my head so it was leaning against his. “You wanna know the real reason I came back? I mean besides Gram, because that really was part of my decision. But it wasn’t the only factor.”

“Okay,” he said, his voice soft.

“It was true that I was burned out, but more than that, I realized that if there wasn’t someone to share my dream with, then it wasn’t so much a dream but a burden. And I didn’t want to share it with just any ‘someone.’ I wanted to share it with you . Every milestone I achieved, every new role I was cast, every award nomination…every single one, I itched to pick up the phone and call you. Even this year at the Tony’s, five years after we broke up, I wanted you to be my plus one. If I won, I wanted to be able to give you a shoutout in my acceptance speech and take you to the parties after.”

“So… Do you miss that life? Do you…?” He took a deep breath. “Do you want to go back? Do you want to give it a try with me there this time?”

I pulled away and scooted around until we faced each other with his hands clasped firmly in mine and my heart beating wildly. “Is that offer on the table? If I wanted to go back to New York, you’d be willing to come with me?”

He took another breath and straightened his spine. Oh, and there was that sexy-as-hell determined glint again. “I’d be willing to give it a try. I think I owe you that much. I owe us that much. I shouldn’t have given up so easily the last time. I should have trusted you when you said you wanted to make it work. I should have believed I mattered enough to you that you’d give it your all.”

I drew his hand forward and brushed my lips across his knuckles. “You did matter, and I would have given it my all. I loved you, sunshine.” Will had said Jimmy needed to hear it. It was time to put it out there. “I still love you.”

He squeezed my hand. “I know. I think I’ve always known. It’s just so much easier to believe the bad things about yourself than the good. Especially when you’ve spent most of your life feeling like everyone else’s burden.”

I tipped his chin and leaned in a little closer, wanting to make sure he could see the truth written in my eyes. “You were never a burden to me. Never. Loving you has been nothing short of a privilege. I feel lucky that I get to love you. Lucky , sunshine.”

He swallowed hard, and I slid my hand along his jaw to the back of his neck. “I don’t want to move back to New York. I want to build a life with you here . I’ve already looked into what it would take to finish my degree. And Annette told me last week that she’ll be back next semester but may choose to stay home with her kiddo next year, which means her position will be open. And if that doesn’t work out, I’ll find another one.”

Jimmy’s eyes had gone glassy, and I swiped at a tear that managed to break free. “You’re end goals for me. This is it. This is the dream I should have been chasing all along. Everything in my life for the last ten years has led me back to you. And this time, I’m holding on to you with everything I have.”

He leaned forward and kissed me. It was sweet and tender and full of emotion. And when he pulled back, I could see the words he hadn’t said written in his eyes plain as day.

Only this time, he finally set them free.

“I love you too. So damn much. I’ve spent the last five years convincing myself I was okay. That I could survive without you. And I did. I survived. Because you’ve always been right about me being stronger than I think. But the thing is… I was surviving, but I wasn’t really living. I wasn’t happy. I was going through the motions.”

This time, Jimmy reached out and wiped away my tears. “Then you showed up at that bonfire, and for the first time in a very long time, it felt like I could take a full breath. It was like I’d been drowning, and you reached beneath the surface and pulled me out. And once I broke through the surface, I realized I never wanted to go back under again. I don’t know.” He gave a shaky laugh. “That’s really corny. You’d think, as a former English teacher, I could come up with a better metaphor.”

I laughed and pressed my forehead to his. “I think it’s perfect.”

We stayed like that for a long moment, breathing each other in while the light faded around us. When a gust of wind blew through the clearing, causing us to shiver, I pulled away. “We should probably head back. It’s getting dark.” I stood and held out my hand to him.

“We can go unmake my bed…” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, startling a laugh out of me.

“I’m definitely not opposed to that.” I pulled him in for a kiss, this one full of suggestive promise as I grabbed his ass and tangled his tongue with mine.

“Would you really have been willing to move to New York with me?” I asked as I pulled away.

“I would have. Though I’m glad I don’t have to move right back out of my house.”

I took his hand and started down the path, turning on the flashlight on my phone to help illuminate the way. “Good point. Though I’m sure Gram would have understood.”

We were almost back to the house before Jimmy spoke again. “I meant what I said. I really do love you.”

“Ah, sunshine.” I squeezed his hand. “I love you too.”