Page 95 of B is for Beg

“Don’t be sorry, baby boy,” Gabe whispers. “You’re wonderful tonight.” He looks into my eyes. “You both were. Thank you.”

I stroke Blake’s shoulder. “Let it all out, princess. Cry as long and as hard as you need.”

I’m not sure how long we lie together. Gabe and I are both fully present until Blake is calm and relaxed between us. Then we all drift in and out of sleep.

I wake fully as light streams through the windows, illuminating my whole apartment. We’re a mess of bodies, all connected. I can hear their heartbeats and feel their soft, slow breaths against my skin. There’s nowhere I’d rather be but with the two of them. I don’t want to imagine my life without them in it.

“I love you,” I whisper. “I love you both so much.”

Their eyes flicker open.

“Say that again,” Gabe says.

“I thought you were both asleep.”

“Which is why you should repeat it so I can be sure of what I heard.”

“I think he said he loves us,” Blake says in a dreamy tone.

“I did. I do. I love you both so fucking much.”

Blake smiles and strokes my arm. “Good thing I love you too.” He says the words so easily as though it’s something he’s known for a while but hasn’t voiced it. “And you, Daddy. I love you.” He closes his eyes again. “Can I go back to sleep now?”

Gabe and I laugh.

“Not quite yet, baby boy,” Gabe says. “I love you both as well.”

“You don’t have to say it just because we did,” I say.

“I’m not,” Gabe assures me. “Maybe I hadn’t realised it until I heard you both say it, but I think if my heart flutters whenever I’m around you both, it probably means I’m in love.”

I can’t begin to describe how amazing it is to hear them both say it, so I don’t even try.

“What do you want to do today?” Gabe asks.

“Sleep?” Blake suggests.

“We can’t spend the whole day in bed.”

“Why not, Daddy?”

“I’ve got to go to the studio,” I say, even though I’d much rather spend the whole day with my lovers. “But you’re welcome to stay here and laze the day away.”

“Sounds good,” Blake says, snuggling against me. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Right here?” I ask, tickling his side.

He squirms. “Yup. I don’t intend to move.” He yawns. “You tired me out last night.”

“Aren’t you supposed to have more stamina than us?” Gabe asks.

“Nah.”

“Seriously,” I say. “Spend the day here. I’d really like to come home to my man and my boy.”

Gabe runs his fingers over my chest. “Are you going to expect dinner to be on the table?”

“I hadn’t thought about it, but now that you mention it…”