Page 224 of Alpha Mates

I open my eyes with some effort, but I’m so glad that I do when my gaze lands on Aiden—myAiden, kneeling beside me, holding a cup to my mouth.

My heart stutters, faltering at first as if it’s forgotten how to beat, then racing ahead, thumping faster than ever as my entire body revives with his presence.

I reach for him, wanting to feel him so that I know this is real, because the tears in my eyes are already blurring him.

“Aaai…” His name breaks on my tongue, mutilated by my throat.

“Don’t try speaking,” he says as he takes hold of my hand.

It’s not a dream. It can’t be because nothing feels like this. The electric wave that washes through me when his skin meets mine too vivid, too alive. It’s real.

I tighten my fingers around his, relishing in the warmth of his palm, the roughness of his skin. Delirium hollows me, and somehow I miss him more now than in any moment of these three awful weeks, even though he’s right here.

“Drink,” he instructs again, this time pressing the cup to my lips.

I obey, sipping tentatively as he carefully angles it into my mouth. But I keep my eyes on him, refusing to blink so that he can’t disappear again. He stares back, his dark eyes narrowing into a frown before he refocuses his attention on the cup.

My chest caves. He’s still angry.

I knew he might be. I tried to prepare myself for that prospect, told myself I could handle it if it meant finding him. But I can’t ignore it anymore when he’s here and distant, even while so close.

“I’m sorry,” I croak when he pulls the cup away. Aiden’s eyes dart up to mine for a second before he looks away again. My heart teeters. “I—I’m sorry, Aiden.”

“Stop talking,” he hushes as he straightens, his hand drawing from mine. I tighten my grip, refusing to let him go, but I’m weaker than I want to be, and my exhaustion is already getting the best of me.

His fingers slip free, and as he walks away, my chest cracks open anew.

I reach for him, but my mind is already bracketing again.

I watch through drooping eyes as Aiden leans against the sink. His knuckles are white around the metal, and he says something, but the darkness swallows it up and takes me with it.

The next time I wake, the world doesn’t tilt or stir. It’s still, as it should be, and stays that way long enough for me to take in my surroundings.

They’re mismatched and unfamiliar—a bed tucked into a low-roofed corner, an apron-front sink and a wooden table, all within a greenhouse that looks out to the meadow I’d first seen when I got here—but it all feels like Aiden, even without his scent lingering.

Aiden.

I jolt upright, tussling the cushions I’m sprawled on as my eyes dart around frantically. He’s not in here. Fresh panic surges, giving me the energy to stand and rush towards the first door I spot.

It spits me outside into the meadow, into flowers and fresh air, but I don’t want any of it. I just want—

“What are you doing?”

My head snaps up, aimed in the direction of Aiden as he storms towards me like a bat out of hell. I hardly register the frown etched into his features, only that he’s still here. He reaches me just as my legs begin to shake, and scoops me up before I fall.

He cradles me to his chest, and I press close, greedy for the sound of his heartbeat. He’s here, in the flesh, alive. I take advantage of the closeness, inhaling as much of his scent as I can while he carries me back inside.

“I thought you left again,” I mumble, and this close, I can hear the way his heart stutters. Aiden doesn’t answer, only lays me back down before he tries to step back, but I don’t let him this time. “I’m sorry, Aiden,” I say, catching his hand.

“Julian …” he grumbles, avoiding my eyes.

“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said—” I swallow, choking around the memory. “What I said. It was wrong. I promise I won’t hurt you like that ever again.” I vow as I tug him to look at me, but he keeps his gaze averted.

“I’ll be better. I’ll be a better mate. I won’t hurt you again! I’m so sorry!” My apologies morph into tears as fear swallows me. “Just don’t leave me again. Please.”

Aiden’s eyes finally find mine, and this time they soften until they look like they used to. He seems to waver, warring between the hurt still mounted there, and the love that won’t die. It pushes and pulls until finally he gives in. He sits beside me and pulls me into his arms.

I don’t waste the opportunity. I wrap myself around him, whimpering as I delve into the crook of his neck, where his scent and warmth soothe the ache in me.