Page 59 of The Deviation
Her gaze drops and her lips roll in but, when she nods, I can tell she’s fighting a smile.
“Okay.”
She continues to stare at me as I pick up my pen and go back to my schedule. “That’s it?”
“What else is there?” I ask. “You’re both consenting adults. You’re dating. What’s the problem?”
Her mouth opens, and then closes. “Exactly.”
A smirk makes its way onto my face. “Exactly.”
The awkwardness lingers as we both eat, but we’ll get over it with time. This was always going to happen sooner or later. Honestly, I’m only glad it didn’t happen sooner. There are upsides to my sister’s disdain for social interaction.
I’m halfway through washing my dishes when she comes to stand beside me with her empty bowl and spoon. “What about you and Johnny?” she asks in a deceptively innocent tone.
I take her dishes and run the soapy sponge over them. “What about us?”
“You’re consenting adults. You’re dating.” She grabs a tea towel and starts drying. “What’s the problem?”
“We’re not dating. We’re hanging out, enjoying each other’s company. Nothing more.”
“Yeah, right, except every time I’m in a room with the two of you I can barely breathe for the pheromones.”
Sighing, I turn away from the now empty sink, snagging the end of her tea towel to dry my hands. “He’s my client. We can’t be… involved.”
She yanks the damp towel from my grasp. “That’s stupid.”
“Keeping my job is stupid, is it?” I ask, lifting my eyebrows at her.
With a tutting sound, she dumps the last spoon in the cutlery drawer and hangs the tea towel on the oven door rail. “Theremust be exceptions to the rule. It’s not like you’re banging every client you come across.”
“There are no exceptions. Trust me, that was made exceedingly clear when I was hired.” I let out an exasperated laugh. “It’s a good thing. They have rules where rules should be.” Even if I’ve realised the reasoning behind the rules is less about ethics and more about preventing litigation.
“But you and Johnny are in love. Surely that’s more important than any job.”
“That’s where you’re wrong.” Rounding the counter, I gather my work things and shove them into my bag. “One, Johnny is not in love with me. And two, taking care of you and me will always be the most important thing I do. My job is a roof over our heads, food on our table, and money in the bank.” She never knew how close we once were to the edge, because I did my best to hide it from her, but I will never forget. “It’s you and me against the world. Remember?”
Her eyes cloud over, and she bites down on her bottom lip. “What if I don’t want it to be you and me against the world anymore?”
The words slam into my chest and I drop onto the stool behind me. “What?”
“It’s been brought to my attention recently,” she says in a small voice, hands fisted at her sides, “having other people around us can be… kind of nice. I think maybe I would like that to continue.”
A breathy laugh rushes out of me as my body sags. “I’ve been trying to tell you that for years.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” she grumbles. “It’s not like you’ve spent the last six years surrounded by friends, either.”
She’s not wrong. The friendships I’d thought were so strong in high school fell away pretty quickly after I turned eighteen. While all my old friends were hitting the pubs and startinguniversity, I was working three jobs to support me and my kid sister. It wasn’t until I landed my internship at Rush that I finally started to catch my breath. Even now, the few friendships I do have are through work.
“You know how grateful I am for everything you’ve done for me,” Hannah says, coming to perch on the stool beside me. “But things will be changing soon. I’ll finish my degree at the end of the year. I’ll finally be able to get a full-time job and contribute more.”
I’m already shaking my head. “There’s no rush, Hannah. I can cover the bills, and I’d prefer you save for your future.”
Storm clouds roll back over her face. “I’d prefer to start taking care of myself, so you don’t have to do it for me. I am done holding you back.”
I frown at her. “You’ve never done anything to hold me back.” She gives me an incredulous look, and I roll my eyes. “Okay, yes, life turned out differently to what I thought it would, but that was never on you.” What happened to us was a selfish act that shredded everything we believed about love and family. It left us with nothing to cling to but each other. Is it any wonder we’re still clinging? “The truth is, I don’t know what I would have done without you.”
“To take care of,” she insists in a hard voice. “You don’t know what you would have done without me to take care of.”