Page 41 of The Ampersand Effect

Grier heard the strain in Tobin’s breathing and forced herself to remain detached. She moved on.

“I’m going to stand behind you. Please cross your arms over your chest.”

Again, Tobin abided wordlessly.

“I’m going to turn your body to the right and then lean you back against me. You’ll feel my hand press over your pelvis. Are you comfortable with that?”

Grier watched Tobin hesitate, stiffen, then nod once. She told herself Tobin was just bracing against the anticipated pain from the orthopedic test—not from her touch. It was a cognitive mind-fuck, suspending her own self-trust like that.

Grier stepped in behind her, reaching around to grip Tobin’s forearm. She positioned her chest against Tobin’s back and gently rotated her, pressing her other hand into the joint at Tobin’s pelvis.

Tobin’s body was rigid in her arms.

“Does this hurt?” Grier asked, her voice softer than it had been moments before.

“Not where you’re pushing. But I can feel it start to sharpen the pain on the other side.” Tobin said, her voice tight with restraint.

Grier shifted her stance to perform the same test on the opposite side. Tobin whined against closed lips as Grier pressed her hand into the joint, feeling substantial warmth and swelling beneath her palm.

“Relax your arms. You’re going to feel my fingers touch your spine.” Grier moved to sit behind her, straddling Tobin from behind. The longer she evaluated Tobin, the harder it became to remain indignant. She was softening—to Tobin’s pain, to her need, to the familiar pull she’d sworn she’d buried.

Grier rested her palms lightly along Tobin’s low back, feeling for areas of warmth—there, on the left side of the spine. She pressed her thumbs gently into the lowest segment, where tension coiled tight beneath the skin. She followed the line of muscles up one spinal segment, and felt Tobin jerk under the pressure.

“Let me know if I’m being too mean,” Grier murmured. “I can back off.”

Instinctively, she responded to Tobin’s physical signals as she would with any of her other patients, softening automatically, her hands reassuring. For a moment, it wasn’t about the past or the hurt—it was about helping, about touch, about trust.

“I’m pretty sure we’ve established you have the right to be mean,” Tobin responded, a slight gasp of laughter palpable under Grier’s fingers.

Grier paused, wanting to respond honestly but not trusting herself to open the door for further flirtation. She knew she wasn’t entirely over the possibility of Tobin, but she also knew she couldn’t be the one to pursue. All she could do was keep the door open. “I don’t relish causing discomfort to anyone on mytable, but I do have a tendency to make people regret telling me where it hurts.” Her lips twitched in a smirk, even knowing that Tobin couldn’t see her.

Tobin’s head dipped slightly.

Grier’s mind wanted to wander, but she fought it at every turn. She swung her legs away from Tobin and stood. “Can you lie on your stomach?”

“I think so.” Tobin waited while Grier elevated the headpiece of her table and indicated she should put her head in the cradle.

“I’m going to press a little harder into the muscles of your low back and move your legs around a bit while I evaluate some more. Please let me know if anything changes your pain.”

Tobin gave a thumbs-up, and Grier completed the rest of her exam. “Well, your low back is definitely hot.”

Tobin tensed slightly on the table, face down. “Thanks…?”

Shit. She probably thinks I’m hitting on her. Great choice of words, Grier!

“I mean… it’s in spasm. Sorry.

“Gotcha.” Tobin muttered, muffled.

“Have you had acupuncture? Or dry needling? Or do you have a fear of needles?” Grier doubted the last one—Tobin’s tattoos negated that likelihood.

“Yes, and no,” Tobin said. “I had dry needling from the PT after the accident. And no, I don’t have anything against needles.”

“Great. I think we should start with some acupuncture and add electric stimulation. Your muscles are way too active for me to adjust you right now—you’d just fight me and spasm more. If we calm things down first, I think I can get you adjusted. It feels more muscular than skeletal at the moment, but you definitely need to be adjusted after the impact you described. Are you comfortable with this?”

“Yes. Anything. Whatever you think will help the pain go away.” Grier gathered her supplies and started prepping Tobin’s back.

“I’ll need to lift your shirt a bit to expose the skin—and pull your waistband down. Still good?”