Page 139 of The Ampersand Effect

It was a quiet, persistent rhythm: her heart, thrumming inside her chest. The rush of Grier’s name, sluicing through her veins.

The name of the woman she loved.

Lub dub, in love, lub dub, in love, in love.

In love.

“Child, this is the obvious part.”

Tobin looked at LoLo, her face a mix of self-satisfied contentment.

“You love,” LoLo said simply. “And that… is the finest way to live.”

Tobin was a mess. A hot, fucking, anxious mess.

She’d barely slept last night, her mind reeling from her conversation with LoLo—and the one with Harrow when she got home.

She’d arrived home after the orchard visit to find Harrow pretendingnotto be anxiously waiting for her in the living room. Tobin didn’t bother delaying the deposition. She’d walked right over to the couch and dropped heavily onto the cushions.

“I’m in love with Grier.”

Her throat constricted in anxiety, even as her body was pummeled with the umpteenth dose of adrenaline that day. She was in love—and her body was buzzing with the realization.

Her mind swam with questions, even as Harrow vibrated beside her. Her utter joy at Tobin’s admission escaped her body like a gleeful toddler, an exuberant squeal ringing in Tobin’s ears.

“LoLo is good!” she exclaimed, “Iknewshe’d figure you out.”

Tobin turned her head, strands of hair falling across her face like a curtain. “You knew,” she accused.

“Uhh—yeah, T.Literallyeveryone can see it. You’re happy, and it shows. Don’t fuck it up, okay?”

Grier’s impeccable timing had interrupted any further conversation—because that’s when Tobin’s phone started buzzing with an incoming FaceTime call.

She’d tried her best to act normal, but as she watched the clip of her own face on the screen, she knew she appeared stilted. And her voice pitched artificially high. Grier kept watching her with those discerning amber eyes, eyebrows scrunched adorably as she tried to quietly demystify Tobin’s thinly veiled composure.

She hadn’t said anything, though.

Now, Tobin was hiking beside Grier in the fading light of late evening, doing her damnedest to keep her shit together as she led them once again toward the forest clearing.

Grier still had no idea what the surprise was, though by now she’d figured out it included a picnic. For all Tobin could tell, Grier assumed that was all this was—a thoughtfully planned picnic in the forest.

Her body hadn’t stopped humming with the realization of her feelings yesterday.

Thoughts raced through her mind, chaotic and loud. Her hands had been unsteady all day—sweating and shaking withexcited energy, aided by a constant supply of adrenaline while her feelings settled, erratic but determined, inside her bones.

She couldn’t wait to see the look on Grier’s face when the first fireflies began to flicker around them. She couldn’t wait to see the look on her face when the swarms descended, lighting up the clearing as if fulfilling an unspoken promise from their non-date all those weeks ago.

But what she really, absolutely, emphaticallycould not wait forwas the look on Grier’s face when Tobin told her she was in love with her.

Grier squeezed her hand lightly, bringing her back to the present.

“Where are you?” she asked, her voice was soft—exculpatory.

Tobin’s heart had been racing for at least the last eighteen hours, but the sound of Grier’s voice and the gentle press of her fingers only emboldened the now-constantlub dub, in loveinside her chest and head.

She squeezed Grier’s hand back—in three quick successions. “I’m just running ahead of myself a bit,” she said, choosing her words carefully. “I think I’m as excited about your surprise as I think you’ll be when you get it.”

She didn’t give anything away—no sensory hints, no emotional clues.