Page 8 of Tangled Hearts (Mended Hearts #4)

Nic

I ’m staring into the eyes of an angel. A fallen angel, and not even from Heaven—just in the middle of the living room, but still.

He’s got long, dark lashes coated in mascara, winged liner, glossy pink lips, a sheen of glitter on his cheeks, and a mess of black hair splayed across a pale, flawless forehead.

My heart seems to have taken a tumble right along with him, and now I can’t do anything but stare down at his face.

“I’m so fucking sorry,” I hear myself say. “Here, let me help you up.”

I slide my hands into his, pulling him carefully to his feet, and then brush my hands down his forearms to steady him when he wobbles a little.

Holden’s quick steps echo in the room. “Hey, Nic. Oh shit. What did you do to Eli?”

“Eli?” I drop my hands quickly. Oh holy fuck.

Not a good first impression to make. “I’m so sorry for knocking you over,” I murmur, losing myself a little in those gorgeous fucking eyes.

Holy shit—that’s definitely not a thought I’m allowed to have.

This is Eli. The Eli Holden hasn’t stopped talking about once. “Are you okay?”

Eli blinks at me, looking a little confused and a lot dazed, like he has no idea what’s happening around him and how he got here.

I’m getting a little concerned when his face twists into a grimace, his nose scrunching up in the most adorable way, but like he smells something disgusting. “You have got to be fucking kidding me. Fucking Liam.”

Liam? Who’s that?

I shake my head slowly, honestly a little worried that I knocked out Holden’s favorite person and gave him a concussion or something. That’d be just my damn luck. “Uh, no. I’m Nic. I really am sorry for knocking you over, but I’m so happy to meet you. Holden’s told me a lot about you.”

I hold my hand out to attempt a handshake, and his eyes fall to it before his nose does that wrinkle again.

When his eyes find mine, he looks a little disgusted, and it makes my heart sink.

He took one look at me and is already disgusted?

Ouch. It would be just like me to piss off someone important to Holden before I’ve even had a chance to properly meet everyone.

“No,” he says. “Not that. You can’t be Nic. ”

“Eli?” Holden says, stepping closer, the same concern I’m feeling mirrored in his voice. “Sit down, little bestie. Let me look at you.”

Holden grabs Eli’s hand, leading him to the couch while I stand mute. Holden cups Eli’s jaw, checks his eyes, and then makes him follow his finger. Holy shit, I may have actually given him a head injury.

“Is he okay?” I ask, finally stepping closer.

Eli’s green eyes shoot to me. “ He’s just fine, thank you,” he answers sharply .

I can’t help but chuckle. Feisty, this one. “Okay, good. I really am sorry.”

“What were you just standing in the doorway for, anyway? Huh? No manners?”

Holden damn near chokes. “Eli,” he admonishes, but it’s unnecessary.

I’m a little shocked, a lot intrigued, and honestly?

Thoroughly amused. “Again, my sincerest apologies. Let’s have a do-over.

” I sit down beside Eli, feigning more confidence than I actually feel, and hold my hand out again.

He reluctantly shakes it. His fingers are smaller than mine, lithe and delicate like the rest of him, and his palm’s a little clammy.

Probably my fault for knocking him to the ground like I did. “I’m Nic. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“I’m Eli.” Not so pleased to meet me then, it seems.

“Well,” Holden says, pulling my attention from Eli and to him. “This is starting off great.”

There’s a slight hitch in Eli’s breathing, but before I can dwell on it, he’s pushing to his feet. “I’m sorry I was late, Uncle Hold. I lost track of time because my stupid fucking wings weren’t working right.”

Holden grins, cupping Eli’s cheek affectionately, and it makes my chest feel tight. “No worries. You look great. Now come on, Julian’s finishing up dinner.”

Eli doesn’t even spare me a glance as he stands and makes his way into the kitchen. I blow out a breath as Holden watches him go. “I’m not sure he likes me. Kind of sucks to have already pissed off your nephew, I won’t lie.”

“Yeah,” Holden says with a sigh. “It’s strange. He’s not usually like that at all.”

Well, that doesn’t make me feel any better. I hum, standing from the couch. “Should I leave? ”

“Of course not.” Holden turns to me with a smile. A genuine smile. “I’m happy to have you here.”

My heart gets a little warm and fuzzy, and when Holden starts toward the kitchen, I follow suit.

When we round the corner, Eli is sitting on the counter and Julian’s standing at the stove.

I let my eyes fully take in Eli now that I’m not worried about head trauma.

It takes approximately two seconds for me to realize that’s not at all a good idea.

His shirt is hanging off his shoulder, revealing a delicate collarbone; a sliver of his stomach is visible, and the jeans he’s wearing look painted on.

The massive holes in them are showing off black fishnets, and the entire ensemble is kind of frying my brain a little bit.

“Do you have an issue?”

Eli’s voice snaps me out of my, frankly, inappropriate perusal, and my eyes fly to his.

They’re narrowed, and I swallow hard. I haven’t so much as looked at another man in over five years because of Leo, and then after Leo, I definitely didn’t want to.

It really would be my fucking brother’s nephew who catches my eye.

I shake my head. “What issue would I have?”

He glances down at his body, insecurity flashing in his eyes before looking back up at me with a scowl. “I don’t know. If seeing a man dressed like this is going to be a problem for you, you’ve probably come to the wrong place.”

I truly don’t even know how to respond to that. Something tells me that telling him it’s the opposite of a problem is the wrong choice, but thankfully, Julian breaks the tension and saves me from having to come up with something to say.

“I know you and Hold are two peas in a pod, but I truly didn’t think you’d be so grumpy without food.”

Eli drags his eyes from me to look at Julian. “I’m not grumpy. ”

Holden laughs. “Sure. Keep telling yourself that.”

I have no idea what I’ve done wrong, but I have a feeling this is about to be the most awkward dinner I’ve ever been to.

If looks could kill, I’d be dead.

“So, Eli,” I say after swallowing a bite of my food. Food I’ve barely even tasted. “What do you do?”

“What do you mean?” he asks.

Holden and Julian have been wholly unhelpful and have barely spoken. I’m starting to worry that maybe they were throwing me to the wolves—Eli—to see if I could pass, and if I didn’t… Well, that was their answer. “For work.”

His eyes go soft immediately. It’s a new expression for him, and it’s fucking stunning.

“Well, I work at my dad’s non-profit.” Green eyes find mine, holding me in their depths.

“He started it a couple of years before I joined the family. They help abused and underprivileged youth. The cause is really important to me, and I’m very proud of the work I do there. ”

“Eli’s great with the kids,” Holden says, shooting Eli a proud smile. “He makes them feel safe.”

I’m a little awestruck, though, because that was the most words Eli’s said to me since we sat down.

Maybe there’s a chance I can salvage this.

“That’s amazing. I bet it’s really rewarding.

I’m a vet tech. Or I guess I was.” Now, I’m just floating around with no home and no family. It’s cool, though. I can manage.

Eli’s eyes narrow to slits. “Did you ask what I did just so you could find a way to talk about yourself?”

What? “ Of course not. That’s how conversations work, yeah? You talk, I talk.”

Julian clears his throat. “Darlin’, can I see you in the living room for a second?”

Oh, that’s not a good idea at all. Holden stands and makes his way into the living room. Julian hesitates, then leans down and whispers something to Eli.

I’m actually dying to know what it was, but when Julian follows Holden out, the heavy weight of awkwardness settles over the room. Not that it wasn’t already awkward, but now it’s even heavier.

Eli’s picking at his food, shoving it around on his plate. This night has not gone at all like I wanted it to. Maybe I need to start fresh. Be vulnerable. I sigh, leaning back in my chair.

“I’m sorry.” Eli’s eyes snap to mine. “I worry we haven’t really made a good impression on one another, and I feel like that’s my fault.

Holden has talked nonstop about you in the twenty-four hours I’ve known him, and I was really looking forward to meeting you.

I’m not really sure what I did wrong, but if you tell me, I’d like to make it right.

I…” My throat gets a little tight, so I clear it and try again. “It’s really important to me.”

The silence is oppressive. Seconds tick by, and finally Eli slumps in his seat. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“I do, though, I think. I clearly managed to upset you somehow.”

After a beat, Eli’s lips tilt up in a little smile. “Uncle Julian just told me to stop being a little shit.”

That gets a startled laugh out of me. It gets Eli going too, and for a moment, the kitchen is filled, not with oppressive silence, but with the sound of our laughter instead. “Are you serious?”

Eli gives me a rueful grin. “Yeah. Told me this dinner was important to Uncle Hold and to stop being a little shit.” The smile falls off his face. “I’m not usually like this,” he murmurs, and I’m not really sure if the words are meant for me.

“I believe that. It’s no big deal. First impressions are overrated anyway.”

Eli laughs, his eyes dancing. When he falls silent, he stares at me. I’m not sure what he’s looking for, but after his eyes scan my face for what feels like a lifetime, he stands. A tentative hand reaches across the table, and I stand too, holding mine out to him.

His warm palm lands on mine, and he shakes my hand. “I’m Eli. Holden’s nephew. It’s very nice to meet you.”

I couldn’t fight my smile if I tried. “I’m Nic. It’s very nice to meet you as well.”

Eli sinks his teeth into his bottom lip and shakes his head, letting his hand fall from mine as he sits back down. “I’m sorry for being an ass.”

I sit down in my seat and smile. “You’re fine. I mean, I basically threw you on the ground seconds after meeting you.”

“What were you doing there anyway? Who just stands in the doorway like that?” This time the question is laced with humor.

“Someone who is incredibly nervous and trying to make a good impression because he wants a family to belong to again.”

Well, that was more than I think I meant to say. Eli and I both go still, the weight of my words hanging around us. “Oh.”

Couldn’t have said it better myself, truthfully. “Yeah.” I chuckle nervously, my eyes falling to my plate. “Anyway, I—”

“I know how you feel,” Eli says quietly, interrupting me.

I look back up at him to find him staring at me with a soft expression.

“When I first met everyone. My Dads. Hold and Julian. I just wanted to belong. I had a family. But uh… well, that didn’t work out so well for me, and um—well, then I found this one and…

” He sighs. “I know how you feel,” he repeats, dropping his eyes again and picking up his fork .

I watch him in silence for a second. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Telling me that.” Eli’s eyes find mine, and we share a moment of silent understanding.

We don’t know each other, not in any real way, but that pain?

That’s a shared pain. It’s common ground, and for now, it’s enough to douse some of Eli’s frustrated fire.

It also gives me a little insight into who he is and what makes him tick.

Vulnerability is a gift. One I’m not used to sharing, mostly because the people I share it with are either dead or dead to me.

But right now? In this tiny pocket of time, I’ve shared mine, and he’s shared his.

It’s a step. An important one. If I want to fit in this family—and God, I so fucking do—I need to do that.

Share myself. No matter how terrifying it is.

The sound of footsteps catches my attention, and Holden and Julian walk back into the room. Holden eyes us warily, and Julian smiles. “All sorted out in here?”

I glance at Eli and he’s rolling his eyes, but his cheeks are bright pink. “All good. Sorry.” He looks at Holden with a grimace. “Sorry, Uncle Hold.”

Holden leans over and presses a kiss to the top of Eli’s head, making his flush turn deeper. “No worries, little bestie.”

I want that. The easy camaraderie, the closeness. An ache blooms in my chest. I just need to be patient. Keep showing up. Keep working at it. Anything worth having is worth working for. And I’ll work my ass off to carve out a place for myself in this crazy, clearly full of love family.

The rest of the dinner goes relatively smoothly. I don’t get any more death glares from Eli, and Holden and Julian engage in conversation, so I guess whatever test I needed to pass, I did. I actually don’t know if that’s what they were thinking or not, but it sure felt that way .

If that was the case, it’s fine. Like I said, some things are worth fighting for.

When we’re done eating, we all head into the living room.

Julian kisses Holden and leaves to go get the kids from their grandparents’ house, and Holden and Eli settle on the couch.

Eli sprawls out, letting his legs dangle off the arm, and rests his head on Holden’s thigh.

Something about it has me feeling strange inside.

Not that I want to lay my head on Holden’s lap. Fuck no. But still.

“Mia is thinking about changing her hair to pink,” Eli says, confusing me, but Holden laughs.

“No way. She’s had blue hair as long as I’ve known her.”

“Who’s Mia?” I ask, mostly because I don’t super love the feeling of being left out.

Eli turns his head, looking directly at me. “There’s a bakery in town—scones to fucking die for, by the way—and one of the owners is a woman named Mia.”

“Scones to die for, huh? I may have to check this place out.”

Holden smiles. “They’re pretty damn good, but I’m partial to the donuts.”

Eli giggles. “You’re boring, is what you are.”

That gets a smile out of me. Donuts are boring. Filed away in the ‘things I know about Eli’ folder.

Eli sits up, bracing his hands on his knees, and gives me his full attention. “This is super important, okay?” My eyes widen. “Like life or death. Friend or no friend shit, yeah?” I nod. “Do you like coffee?”

I turn my nose up. “Gross bean water? Absolutely not.”

Eli grins, glancing at Holden. “Fine. We can keep him.”