Page 35 of Tangled Hearts (Mended Hearts #4)

Nic

E li walks in the door at home in front of me, and as soon as I close it behind me, I rush after him.

He lets out a little yelp when I slide my hands under his skirt, my fingers exploring the fucking panties he’s wearing.

“There should be a rule against giving me a hard dick around your dad, little doll.”

He giggles, turning a bit so he can look at me. “Oh? What’s my punishment going to be? And we both know you don’t have it in you to not let me come.”

Little shit. “You’d be surprised.”

Eli’s eyes go wide. “Are you serious?” And there’s the pouty bottom lip. I was waiting for that one. “You really wouldn’t let me come?”

Eli seems happiest when I’m controlling sex. I’m not sure if that’s because he feels too inexperienced, or if he just genuinely enjoys giving up control to me. I’m leaning toward the latter. Mostly because of the way he just… melts when I take over.

Either way, I’m not opposed, but we’re quickly approaching the limit of what I’m comfortable with without an actual conversation.

It’s one thing to boss him around; it’s another for him to give up complete control to me, and the further we get into our relationship, the more I get the feeling that’s what he wants.

“I’d let you come, but only if you were a really, really good boy for me first.”

His eyes widen, his pupils expanding, and then he nods. “I can do that.”

Of course he can. He literally just has to be fucking breathing to be good for me. “What do you want?” I ask him, letting my fingers dip under the edge of his panties to stroke his hips.

He shivers, leaning into me. “Whatever you want.”

“I asked what you want.” I press my lips to his forehead, making little circles on his skin with my thumbs. The juxtaposition of the innocent kiss and the not-so-innocent touch is not lost on me.

He makes a whiny little noise. “I want you to take over.”

My heart speeds up. “Take over what?”

He glares up at me, and I have to bite back a smile. “Jesus. It’s not sexy when I have to ask for it, Nicolas.”

“Wrong, Elliot,” I tease, letting my hands fall from his sides. His glare intensifies. I’m not sure if it’s because I stopped touching him or because I’m giving him his own shit back, but either way, it’s adorable. “Clear consent is always sexy.”

He groans. “Ugh. You sound like Uncle Holden.”

“Oof. Maybe let’s not talk about my brother when my dick is hard?”

The glare disappears, and he giggles. “Fair. Okay, fine. We’ll do it your way.”

I can’t help but smile at his petulant tone. “I knew you’d see things my way. ”

“Can we at least have this talk in bed?” He pouts at me, green eyes shining with fake innocence. “Naked, preferably.”

I shake my head. “Bed, yes. Naked, no. I’m afraid not.”

He growls, throwing his hands up in frustration. He storms off to the bedroom, mumbling under his breath that he must be losing his touch. I laugh. Not losing his touch at all, but some things are important to talk about, and this is one of those things.

After a few seconds, I follow him into my bedroom. Not his. He doesn’t sleep there anymore. I’m not sure why we picked my room when his is the primary, but it doesn’t really matter either way to me.

When I step into the room, he’s sprawled out across the bed, arms crossed over his chest, and his skirt riding indecently high on his slim thighs. He looks like a fallen angel. You know, if angels were actually sent to Earth for the sole purpose of making me fucking crazy over them.

“You’re not naked,” he says, staring at me.

“Nope. I told you. Clothes on.”

He huffs but sits up, then his expression sobers. “You’re right. I’m sorry for pushing it.”

I sit down on the edge of the bed. “Trust me, Eli. I’m fine with it. I know you’re playing around. It’s fun. Refreshing. I’ve liked your attitude since the second you asked me what I was doing just standing around.”

His lips turn up in a smug smile, and then he faces me, sitting with his legs crossed. It’s like he doesn’t even realize how fucking gorgeous he is. How sexy. Like he doesn’t even know the effect he has on me. “Well, let’s talk then.”

I take a deep breath. “You said you wanted me to take over. What does that mean? ”

He shrugs, rolling his eyes at me. “You know? Like take over. I want whatever you want.”

I hum. I don’t think he realizes just how far those words could go with someone who isn’t trustworthy.

“Do you want me to put you over my knee and spank you?” His eyes widen.

“Or maybe cane you or whip you? Or maybe I could gag you, tie you up, and leave you there for hours. You want whatever I want, right?”

He shakes his head, choking on his breath. “Jesus Christ. Fucking no.”

“And that’s why clear consent is sexy.” I raise an eyebrow at him. “I would never do those things to you anyway, even if you asked for them, but do you see why it’s important to talk about things instead of just assuming I know what you want and what you’re okay with?”

“Well, I don’t want you to hurt me. Goddamn, don’t you think I’ve been hurt enough already?” he snaps, anger burning in his eyes.

The words hit like a punch to my gut, and I flinch. “Eli,” I whisper, reaching for him, but he jerks away from me. I won’t lie, it hurts my heart, but I get it. “Oh, my little doll, I would never hurt you.”

I reach for him again, my hands shaking, and this time, he lets me.

I pull him into my lap and tilt his chin back so I can look at him.

“This is why I have to know what you want, Eli. I’ll take control, but you have to give it to me.

Willingly. I have to know where the lines are.

And I have to trust you’ll tell me if I cross one, or if we stumble on one we didn’t know was there. ”

He huffs, blinking up at me with those gorgeous fucking eyes of his. “And then what? I safe word or something?”

Oh, that’s a surprise. He must see it on my face because he rolls his eyes. “I know what a safe word is. I’m a virgin, but I do watch porn. And maybe I don’t have a lot of experience with sex—okay, so like, none other than you—but I still know what I want. ”

“I’m not sure I’d call you a virgin, doll.”

“That’s what you take from that?” he asks, his jaw dropping open.

I shrug. “You’re twenty. I’d be surprised if you hadn’t watched porn. But that’s not the point. What do you want?”

He sighs, going lax in my lap. “This is embarrassing.”

“What is? Having an open conversation with someone you like about sexual preferences?” It’s rare that I see signs of how much younger Eli is than I am, but in moments like this, it’s almost painfully clear.

He nods. “Yeah, kinda. Maybe not embarrassing, but like, still kind of?”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

He gets the most adorable, twisted-up facial expression. “It’s, like embarrassing, but it kind of… does it for me a bit. That’s weird, right?”

Well, that doesn’t clear up anything at all. “I’m so confused, Eli.”

“It’s like…” he starts but trails off, nibbling on his lower lip while he thinks.

“I think I like it. When you’re touching me and stuff and…

I don’t know. I get all squirmy inside. And you like…

tease me about it. But you’re not mean.” His eyes find mine.

“I don’t want you to be mean to me.” The sincerity in his gaze has my heart pounding.

“I would never be mean to you.”

He nods. “I know, but sometimes you kind of are, but in a nice way.” His cheeks flush bright pink.

“Like when you tell me how much I’m leaking or how good I’m being, but you get this tone.

Like condescending but not. Like I exist just for you.

” My dick throbs at his words and the heat in his voice as he says them. “I like that.”

“So, you want to feel a little… owned?” I ask, studying his face.

His cheeks flush deeper, but he nods. “Yeah. Like I belong to you. ”

Fuck. Fuck me. “You do belong to me, Eli.” His pupils blow wide, his breath hitching. “I can do that.” He nods, licking his lips. “This is turning you on, huh? You like being told you’re mine.”

He nods again. Slower this time, like his brain is starting to shut down. I can’t have that, so I straighten and help him sit back in front of me on the bed instead of being in my lap. “I think what you’re describing is a bit of a humiliation kink, baby. Maybe not full-blown, but a touch of it.”

His nose turns up. “I don’t want to be humiliated. I just said I don’t want you to be mean to me.”

I shake my head. “No, that’s not what I mean.

” I crawl over him, shoving him back on the bed.

His eyes widen, but I push on, trying to tell my dick to calm down because we’re proving a point and nothing more.

“Look at you,” I whisper, letting my voice take on a teasing edge.

“So desperate already. I don’t even have to touch you for you to want me.

” Eli whimpers, his flush spreading down his throat.

I brush my nose along it, feeling the heat from his skin.

He arches up, whimpering. “Needy little doll. I bet you’re already leaking for me, aren’t you? ”

He shudders. “Yeah. Yes. I—”

I climb off him, ignoring the way my dick is just as desperate as I was teasing him for being.

He sits up, inhaling a sharp breath. “ That’s what you mean?”

I chuckle. “Does it make you feel a little squirmy and embarrassed?”

He pauses, like he’s checking in on himself to see how it feels. “Yeah… Yes, actually. But I like it.”

I wink at him. “Teeny humiliation kink, doll. You don’t want me to be mean, and I never would. But you like being squirmy and embarrassed, and you like when I point it out. ”

“Okay, yes. Fine. I like it.” He swallows hard. “Like, really like it. Ugh. Being hard because I’m hard about being embarrassed is so stupid. ”

“Anything that gets you off isn’t stupid, doll. You’re allowed to like whatever you want. What else? What does ‘giving me control’ look like to you?”

It’s like with that confession from him, the floodgates open. “I like when you put your hand on my throat. It makes me feel safe, but I know you won’t like actually choke me.”

I shake my head. “Of course not.”

“Right.” He nods. “I like when you dirty talk me. And when you tell me I’m good.

” His cheeks haven’t lost their pink hue at all, and he looks fucking adorable and sinful all at the same time.

“I like when you take over. When you tell me what to do. I don’t have to think, you know?

I just have to be. I like that. Not having to think.

Just being yours. I want you to have free rein to do whatever you want to me.

Fuck me. Or make me suck you off. Touch me however you want.

Anything. I just want to be yours. That probably sounds dumb. ”

It doesn’t escape my notice that he’s listed two things we haven’t done.

Right after telling me to do whatever I wanted with him.

I brush my finger down his cheek. “Nothing about your wants is dumb. I’m good with all of that.

For the record, you telling me you don’t want to think and just be mine might be the hottest thing I’ve ever heard.

And also, no will always mean no. But do you want to pick a word that means no, anyway? ”

He nods slowly. “Most people do red, right?”

“Some do.”

Eli gets a teasing glint in his eyes. “What if I want something ridiculous, like dinosaur or apple pie?”

I can’t help the laugh that bursts from my chest. “Sure, doll. Whatever you want.”

He grins. “Okay. No means no. But also, apple pie means no. Now, we’ve done all the boring talking. Get undressed.”

“Look at you being all bossy seconds after telling me you want me to take control,” I say, laughing a bit. “I do have a question.”

“Ask away,” he murmurs, pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it to the side before lying back and shimmying out of his skirt. When he’s down to his panties—which are soaked in pre-cum, just like I knew they would be—he looks up at me. “Well, are you going to ask?”

“Sorry, doll.” I swallow hard. “I’m a little distracted.” I clear my throat, forcing my eyes to his. “When you said fuck you… Did you mean like now? Or sometime in the future? Like hypothetically?”

His nose scrunches up. “Did I, or did I not, just tell you I wanted you to take control? Free. Rein. You said we could do that. You said. ”

“What if you’re not ready?” Why am I asking those questions? I want to fuck him. Of course I do. I just want to make sure he’s sure.

He rolls his eyes. “Good God. Man gives me a safe word. I give him control. He says it’s fine. Then he questions me anyway.”

“Your eyes are gonna get stuck like that, you little brat.”

The grin that lights up his face has my heart tripping over itself. He looks so completely fucking free and happy. “Good. Then I’ll just be constantly rolling my eyes at you instead of having to do it every single time you do something eye-rolly.”

I grab his thigh and pull him toward me, smiling when he lets out a surprised yelp.

“Are you sure?”

He blinks up at me. “Yes. Are you going to ask me every single time, even though I just told you to do whatever you want? ”

“Nope, I trust you. I’m just going to ask this once. It’s your first time, and I want to be sure that you’re sure.”

He sobers, his face taking on a more serious note. “I’m sure. I promise. And I promise I’ll tell you to stop if I need to or don’t like something. No, and apple pie.”

I chuckle, leaning over to press a kiss to his stomach. “Good boy. Do you have lube and condoms?”

“Yeah,” he says, breathy and soft. “In my room. I can go get them.”

I shake my head, running my hand up his thigh and over his straining erection, smiling when he bucks up with a moan. “No. You stay here and be a good boy. I’ll go get them.”