Page 80 of Sketching Mr. Darcy
“We should sleep now,” he said, and she silently approved.
He kissed her hand then her temple, and his mouth remained near her ear. She shivered and moved closer while he spoke breathlessly.
“Elizabeth, before we return to London, I shall speak to your father about Wickham.”
A moment of silence. “Yes, it should be done. I shall speak with Jane too.”
“And tomorrow I will have a word with Wickham if he has truly returned to Meryton. I know my suspicion of your informing him about the visit to the modiste was ridiculous, but I cannot believe it was a coincidence. ”
Her heart skipped a beat. She glanced at him through the darkness. “William?”
“Yes?” His hand climbed along her arm. She shivered again and closed her eyes a moment, wondering how best to start.
“There is something of great importance I need to speak to you about before tomorrow.”
He rose from the pillow, looking at her with obvious concern.
“What is it, Elizabeth?”
“Please listen to me to the end. I know you will be displeased, but I have great hopes that things will be better.” She took hold of his hands and breathed deeply.
“Do you remember that Georgiana asked to speak to you, and you refused to see her? I spent a lot of time with her after you left, as she was even more devastated than I was by your reaction. It was hard to persuade her to trust me, but finally she confessed that she had informed Mr Wickham about our plans.”
Darcy looked at her with a tormented expression and slowly withdrew his hands.
“Georgiana? That cannot be…He wouldn’t dare…She could not lie to me in such a way…”
“Georgiana’s affection for you is as strong as her esteem.
But please remember that you stopped the elopement and sent Wickham away without giving her any details.
You told her that Wickham was not worthy of her affection and that she was too young to know her heart.
Not knowing his true character, her affection was enhanced by the longing of not seeing him.
She thought his gesture of eloping with her was romantic, and she was convinced he was a good man by the fact that your father loved him. ”
He seemed to make a tremendous effort to follow her words and understand them. “But…does this mean that they have been in touch all this time? How?”
“She said Wickham only sent her a short note after Christmas then another three days ago when he likely learnt from James that you were out of town. The letters were delivered through James’s servant.
I think Mrs Annesley found nothing strange in the letters that came from your cousin, as she is unaware of Wickham’s history.
Georgiana confessed everything to me in such terrible distress that she broke my heart.
She is truly in love with him, William. She said she could not fight her heart. You must know what that means…”
Darcy gazed at her a few long moments, so intently that she felt a pain in her chest. Then he rushed out of the bed and went to the window, pouring himself a glass of wine.
“You have every right to be upset that I did not tell you sooner, but…”
“I am not upset with you. I am ashamed that in a week you gain more of my sister’s trust than I have in a lifetime.
You understood her heart and bonded to her, and she grew so affectionate towards you that she shared the most painful story of her life with you.
And I only managed to frighten her and push her away when she wanted to speak to me. ”
“Oh, that is nonsense,” she said decidedly, stepping near him.
“She is a marvellous young woman, and it is your merit for how you helped her grow. She wanted to confess her guilt to protect me from your anger. She heard you yelling at me and was devastated for me. She put my comfort above her own. And I find little fault in her behaviour—only innocence.”
“I do not fault her, either. And yes, I understand how it is to be unable to fight against your heart. But I cannot allow this to continue. I will speak to Wickham tomorrow and warn him again. I shall kill him if he ever comes closer to either you or Georgiana.”
“Killing Wickham is not the answer. And forbidding Georgiana to be in touch with him will not help much either. She must learn to know her heart and separate right from wrong. And that is not easy. I am much older, and even I have been at fault on this subject recently. And I still cannot pride myself on knowing my own heart as well as I would wish to—not even when it comes to my own husband.” She attempted to smile.
“Then what should I do? I must do something; I cannot abandon my sister to danger.”
“Do you remember when I told you that the truth would help me fight the danger? It will also be helpful to Georgiana. She promised she would speak to you in person. You must only listen to her and answer any questions she might have.”
His gaze caressed her, and he held her hands in a long silence.
“Do you remember a week ago when you did not know what to do with Janey and you were amazed that I have the perfect solution for everything? I can say that about you now.”
She laughed with no little emotion. “It must be contagious. Now let us return to bed.”
He put another log on the fire then sat near her, astonished at how beautiful she looked in the light of the fire. He then kissed her hand and whispered with deepest emotion.
“You show so much affection to my sister while I hurt yours…”
“True—but you still have time to improve. Oh, and I also told Georgiana that, if Wickham had eloped with my sister of fifteen, I would have broken his legs.”
He looked at her in disbelief. She pressed her lips together to suppress her laughter.
“If I meet Wickham tomorrow, I would be happy to do it for you,” he replied seriously, and she put her hand over her mouth, laughing in silence.
“But then you must take similar measures with Lady Stafford,” she teased in a low voice.
“Speaking of that: yesterday I went to James to inquire about Wickham. We had a short argument and when I was about to leave, Annabelle entered. She behaved like her usual self and insisted on talking to me, but I was exhausted and angry, so I answered her as I had wished to for years. I truly believe she understood the message properly that time.”
“Oh, I am frightened to even ask what you said to her.”
“I do not remember much, but essentially, I told her that she has less wit than my dog.”
At Elizabeth’s astonished expression, he continued with perfect calm.
“In my defence, I repeatedly insisted on not being bothered by her but with no success. Titan understands the first time I tell him.”
She started to laugh, and he leant closer, staring at her. The tiredness made her face pale, but her eyes were sparkling although her eyelids seemed heavy. Her laughter soon vanished as his lips imprisoned hers in another long kiss.
“James told me that he visited and you spoke when I was away,” he eventually said.
“We did.”
“Would you tell me about the subject of your discussion? He said it was rather difficult but not unpleasant and that you were more convincing than I had been in five years.”
His lips now caressed her temple, her jaw, and back to her cheeks. Every inch of her skin quivered, and her feet felt very cold. She struggled to answer.
“We spoke of your involvement…and his lack of interest in his duties…and that you are burdened with everything he used to neglect. I did not mention what he does wrong but what you do faultlessly to maintain everything under good regulation.”
“I am not faultless,” he whispered, and his lips brushed hers.
“I know you are not,” she murmured, and their lips found and relished each other.
“We must sleep now. It is very late, and tomorrow we will awaken early,” he said some time later. “Good night, my beautiful wife. Rest now.”
Elizabeth’s face lifted to reach his. She felt her cheeks and neck burning with shame, but her eyes daringly held his.
“I am not your wife yet, but I would not be opposed if you wish to. I would not mind at all.”
“You are very generous, but our first time together cannot happen in a house full of people and thin walls. And I hope you will come to feel more than just not being opposed and not minding . I hope that soon you will not just accept my wishes but return my love and passion. I want you to become my wife when you hold no doubts, no fears, and no restraint. I can wait a little longer…”
A long silence, filled with emotion and broken only by the blowing wind outside and the crackling wood of the fire, enveloped them.
Slowly, Elizabeth leant her head to rest on his chest. His arms embraced her, and she closed her eyes, listening to his beating heart—first quick, wild, restless, then turning calmer, more steady, more peaceful, as was Elizabeth’s first time sleeping in her husband’s embrace.