Page 56 of Sketching Mr. Darcy

“The situation suddenly took a worrisome turn for me. She insisted I should not be concerned for her. But of course I was—I believed her to feel real affection for me, and I was grateful for her company when I most needed it. So I told her that I was willing to rent her a house with all the expenses paid for the next few months in Ramsgate or wherever else she wished until she solved her situation. She at first refused, then she expressed her gratitude in a most overwhelming way and again, my vanity was rewarded.”

His embarrassment increased and Elizabeth blushed again.

“A day before my departure, she said she had decided to remain in Ramsgate, close to her friends. She asked me to lend her the necessary funds for six months of rent. She promised she would repay me as soon as she found a way, but of course, I declared that was not necessary. I felt I owed her that help, so of course I gave her the money with no hesitation.”

“It is understandable…”

“Perhaps… My separation from Annabelle went reasonably well. She cried, and I told her to let me know whether she needed any help, anytime. I left, and I confess I felt no regret but rather a sort of relief. I returned to Pemberley—guilty about my long absence and anxious to see my father and my little sister. She was so happy that she barely left my side. Wickham was there of course, and he seemed to provide companionship to my father and my little sister—and I was grateful to him for that. He was not inclined to learn anything or to work, but he was an affectionate friend, I thought back then. What would you now say about my foolishness? Could anyone have been more wrong in so many particulars?”

“Surely, you cannot blame yourself for trusting your friend! And Annabelle?”

“In my next journey, as I was in the vicinity, I stopped in Ramsgate to see her. I planned to stay only a few minutes to make sure she was well and that she had found a proper house. I arrived in the afternoon, and I called on her friends—who were obviously panicked. They told me she was out on a walk. They did not invite me to enter, and I did not request it. While departing, I noticed Annabelle on the arm of a gentleman, very affectionate to each other. She was shocked when she saw me, but I found the situation quite pleasing. She seemed well, and she had found another recipient for her affection. I left with an easy heart. When I returned to London, I found three letters in which she explained to me that the gentleman was a friend from her childhood. I wrote back, assuring her that she did not need to offer me any explanations and that I wished her all the best.”

“So everything seemed settled,” Elizabeth said, puzzled.

“I believed that too until two months later when I visited Robert at his regiment. There was a full encampment of officers, and one evening at a party, I met a Colonel Weston—a gentlemen in his early fifties. He spoke of his wife with much admiration, declaring her beauty was astonishing and he missed her very much. He said she was staying with some friends at the seaside, as the weather in the North and life in the encampment did not suit her too well. I was left in no doubt that he was Annabelle’s husband. ”

“How is it possible?”

“I wondered the same! I was so furious at Annabelle’s deception that for a moment I was tempted to make full disclosure to Colonel Weston.

My cousin scolded me. He reasonably said I had no reason to hurt the man.

It became now obvious even to me that Annabelle’s attachment to me was only her usual behaviour—most likely for monetary gain. ”

“How horrible!”

“I sent her a short message: ‘I met your husband!’ Of course, she wrote me back with a long and silly explanation about being so rapturously in love with me that she would have done anything for my company. I ripped up the letter. Two years later, Robert told me that her husband had died, and that was my last information about her for a while.”

Elizabeth was breathless with anticipation. Darcy’s distress was obviously growing with each moment and so was her anxiety.

“A year later, my father passed away. One day I was shocked to receive Annabelle at my door in London. I asked the servant to show her out, but she insisted she wished to tell me something of great importance. With much pathos, she said that, two and half years earlier, she had given birth to a child who was mine—a boy. I was so shocked that I could not breathe for a time. ”

Elizabeth was astonished. He avoided her eyes, his voice lowered by the lump in his throat.

“I asked whether she was certain the child was mine—such a stupid question as the answer she gave me was the obvious one. She said she decided to leave for America as she was in a difficult situation. She had debts she could not pay and she would take the child with her. She said she had only enough money to travel third class. I asked her where she lived, and she named a very questionable inn. I took Stevens and helped her move into a respectable hotel. The child struck me the moment I saw him—dark and curly hair, dark eyes. He looked so similar to me that I had few doubts remaining.”

“Dear Lord, is it possible?”

“I felt lost, and went to speak to my aunt and uncle. Robert and Thomas were there too. I struggled with what to do; my feelings were so deeply torn. The idea of having a son warmed my heart, but I knew I needed to find an arrangement to keep Annabelle at a distance. However, I could not be so cruel as to separate a child from his mother.”

“What a situation, William…

“I did not sleep a few nights from worry, and I spent each day visiting Annabelle and the boy. There were some details that drew my attention from the beginning: the child seemed frightened, and he did not want to interact with me or with Annabelle. He cried a lot, and I wanted to bring Dr. Taylor, but she said it was his usual way. He seemed to have no affection for her, and she barely gave him any notice. At first I thought I discovered another aspect of her ugliness—her lack of love for her own child.”

“And…?”

“One day, Lady and Lord Matlock visited them with me and, while they admitted that the boy seemed to resemble me, Lady Matlock noticed no interaction between the child and his mother, which she found unbelievable. Having my suspicions doubled, I hired someone to investigate Annabelle’s last years.

A week passed before I had all the answers, and during this time, I became close to the boy. ”

“What did you discover?”

“Everything Annabelle told me was untrue. She was not French but from the North, from a family that was in trade. She married when she was nineteen and had spent most of her time in Ramsgate where she indeed had some friends. Nobody remembered her being with child, and on deeper investigation, we found that the child belonged to a shop girl, married to a young gardener. Annabelle used to purchase her gowns from that shop, and she put together a horrible scheme: she simply took the boy from his parents without anyone knowing where the poor child was! The man who discovered that outrageous truth brought the parents with him, and I found them at my door.”

Elizabeth’s shock made her stop breathing. He responded with a bitter smile.

“The boy’s parents were desperate, but I could not pay much attention to them.

Anger had taken control of me, and I could not think of anything except how to punish Annabelle.

I still had enough reason to send for Robert, but he was away, and Lord Matlock came instead.

He tried to calm me, but I saw he was in no better condition.

We finally went to confront Annabelle, taking the child’s parents with us.

When she saw us all, her reaction was one of complete shock, and then she fainted.

I confess I was not at all impressed. The mother took the child in her arms—if you could only see their happiness and the boy’s joyous laughter! ”

Another pause followed so he could gather himself enough to speak further. Elizabeth was silent and tearful, struggling to comprehend everything she heard.

“The discussion that followed still makes me furious. Annabelle kept insisting that she had done everything to get my attention, that she loved me and would do anything for me. I was equally angry, disconcerted and disgusted—with both of us. I could not believe that I had been such a weak fool, so easily deceived by a shameless woman. I could not bring myself to charge her. I thought of the scandal that would arise and its affect on the family, especially Georgiana. Besides, the child’s parents begged us to let them return to their home.

They were simple people who did not want any scandal either.

I told Annabelle that I would pay for the room for another two days, and I did not wish ever to see her again.

That was four years ago, and I never saw her again until this December. ”

“Dear Lord…what a story…How can anyone do such horrible things?”

He stood at the window, staring outside.

“I hope you now understand my reluctance to share it with you and why I blame myself for allowing it to happen. But however ashamed I feel, it is better for you to know the truth and to be warned about it…and to discover more faults in the man you were forced to marry.”

“Oh, stop such nonsense, William. Any man could have been in your place.”

“You are too kind and too generous,” he said, still avoiding her eyes.

“I am only being reasonable, I believe. Does Georgiana know anything of this?”

“No—how could I tell her such a story? But she knows the child—his name is Tommy—as he and his parents are now in Lambton. His mother works in a shop, making dresses for the women in the neighbourhood. The father is the fourth gardener at Pemberley.”

A trace of a smile appeared on her lips. “Does Pemberley need a fourth gardener?”