Page 80

Choyce Mancinelli

T he swing creaked beneath me as I kicked off the ground. I pumped my legs just as Chosyn taught me, harder and faster, until my feet were flying. I smiled so big it made my cheeks hurt.

"Chosyn! Look at me!" I shouted, hoping she'd see how high I was going.

"Great job, Choyce," she called from the bench nearby.

My legs burned as I kept trying to go higher because Chosyn was watching. When I looked back, her head was down, and her eyes were glued to her phone. Rolling my eyes, I leaned back on the upswing, prepared to scoop my legs again and go even higher.

"What the ? —"

I felt hands on my shoulders, my grip slipped, and then nothing was underneath me, and I was hitting the pavement face first.

Pain exploded across my cheek, and my knees scraped against the gravel. "Ahh!" I hissed, tears stinging my eyes as I pushed myself up on shaky hands.

A boy who might've been a little older climbed onto my swing like he hadn't just shoved me off.

"I was on that," I snapped, voice shaking.

He shrugged. "Not anymore."

My tears broke free, and I didn't bother stopping them. I turned and ran, my sobs getting louder the closer I got to Chosyn.

"Chosyn," I cried, barely able to say her name.

She looked up, and the second she saw my face, everything about her changed.

"What the hell happened?" she snapped, loud enough for people to turn and stare.

"He pushed me off," I tattled, pointing toward the swings.

Chosyn stood slowly, tucking her phone in her pocket. Without saying a word, she stalked toward the boy. Her steps were calm, but I knew her. Calm meant danger.

The boy didn't even notice her until it was too late. She grabbed the chain mid-swing and yanked it, stopping it before her fist flew into his jaw. He barely made a sound before she shoved him off and straddled him, punches landing one after another.

"Chosyn, stop!" I screamed, grabbing her arm. "Please!"

She paused, chest heaving, eyes wild. "Hit him back," she demanded.

I blinked. "What?"

"You heard me."

"But—"

"He pushed you, Choyce," she said, voice stern like when I was in trouble. "What did Daddy say about people putting their hands on us?"

I swallowed. "You deserve whatever you allow to happen," I whispered.

"That's right." Her grip tightened on my wrist. "If you don't stand up for yourself, people will treat you as if you don't matter, so hit him."

I looked down at the boy. He looked scared.

"Choyce."

My hand trembled as I made a fist. I stepped forward, heart pounding so hard I thought it might pop out. Then I swung.

The first hit caught him in the eye. He groaned. I hit him again and again until parents came running, shouting at me to stop. Someone grabbed my arm, but before they could pull me away, Chosyn snatched me back.

"Don't touch my fucking sister!" she shouted, making the grown woman flinch. "None of y'all said a word when he shoved her, so don't say shit now!"

Nobody said a thing until we were walking away. When we got outside the park, Chosyn finally turned to me.

"I know you're not like me—" she started.

"I want to be," I muttered, cutting in.

She looked at me, then smiled. "Trust me, you don't," she said. "You're exactly who you're supposed to be at nine. Sometimes I forget that. I try to turn you into me, and that's not fair. Stay the sweet little girl that you are and let me deal with the bad stuff, okay?"

My throat felt tight, but I nodded.

"Choyce."

I blinked the memory away as I looked down at Kage's hand resting gently on my thigh. His thumb moved just enough to ground me and bring me back to now.

"I'm okay, Kage," I huffed and turned toward the window.

I hated this feeling of yearning for a time when things were simpler.

When I could just be and didn't have to brace myself for the bad stuff because my big sister faced it for me.

Back then, I woke up every morning excited to see what the day would bring.

Now I wake up on edge, always calculating, always fighting to survive.

Every day was war, and I was doing everything in my power not to bleed out.

"What happened back there?" Kage asked, refusing to let it go.

I exhaled through my nose, forcing myself not to shut down. "Chosyn showed up being Chosyn," I muttered.

"Can you blame her?"

I didn't take offense at Kage siding with my sister because he was right.

"Chosyn has every right to be mad," I agreed, looking out the window.

"But when does curiosity kick in? When does knowing me count for something?

She was there. She saw who I was before all of this.

The little girl who couldn't speak up for herself.

She raised me. Yet, all she sees now is a liar, manipulator, and the woman who played her into killing her own father. "

My throat tightened because, through it all, I still needed my sister, but Chosyn made it clear every chance she got how she didn't need me.

"And I still don't understand why she's so hung up on that when I saved her. Chance was going to force her to marry Killian. Killing him was the only way out. She got her happily ever after because of me. Not Wolfe. Not River. Me. Her fucking sister."

Kage nodded slowly, letting it settle. "I hear you. Don't think I don't. A lot of the shit you went through with Talon, I was there for. Just like Chosyn got her reasons, you have yours."

"But," I said, already feeling it creep in.

"But," he agreed. "You gotta own your part in this, too. You played with that girl's head for months, Choyce."

"I wasn't ready to?—"

"It doesn't matter," he cut in, voice low. "The second you hit send on that first text, you crossed a line. I told you not to play it that way. Then you showed up and acted like you didn't know what was going on, playing innocent, playing scared. From where I'm sitting? You're lucky."

I scoffed. "Lucky?"

"Yeah. Lucky, Choyce. You told me yourself that Chance raised Chosyn to be a killer. You're lucky she's only icing you out and not burying you next to him."

"Chosyn wouldn't," I muttered, shaking my head.

"Maybe not the you she raised, but you now?" He shrugged. "You're not that sweet girl anymore. You haven't been for a while, but you're not all the way gone either."

I turned to him, eyes narrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

My phone buzzed in my hand with Honor's name on the screen.

"Answer it. We'll finish this later," Kage said.

I sighed, swiping to answer. "Now's not a good time, Honor."

"I don't care," he flatly replied. "I made the first move with Lucian. That's me doing you a favor. Now I need one back."

A grin curled at my lips, followed by the tip of my tongue.

"Anything for you, Honor," I purred, locking eyes with Kage through the rearview.

"Choyce." His tone grew lower, even grittier. It clung to my skin, wiping the smile clean off my face.

"You must've forgotten who I am. I have no problem putting you and your fruity-loop husband in the dirt, but don't trip, Cherish is gon' be straight. Navy and I will adopt her and raise her as our own."

"I wish the fuck you would," I gritted.

"Keep fucking playing like I'm not a married man and watch what I said come to life.

I sucked my teeth and rubbed my temples to keep calm. "What do you need, Honor?"

"Pull up on me later tonight around nine at the mill and have some fun with a nigga."

"Fun?" I repeated, but he was already gone.

"What does that nigga want?" Kage asked.

"He wants me to meet him later tonight at the mill," I relayed, then leaned back against the seat. Thoughts of another life — the life I could've had if Chosyn hadn't shot my father and Chance hadn't thrown me to the wolves, flooded my mind. Then came a single haunting question.

Would I trade this life, my daughter, for the one where my sister still looked at me with love?

The sky cracked open the second we pulled up at the slaughter mill. Thunder rumbled like warning drums as the storm began to circle above.

"He's inside already?" Kage asked.

"I don't see his car, but he should be."

Kage got out first, then came around to open my door. We stepped inside the dimly lit building, and I immediately covered my nose. The air was thick with the scent of iron and something rotting.

"The fuck is that?" Kage frowned.

I shrugged and followed the hum of machinery. We headed toward the back and down a hallway I'd never noticed before.

"Let me go first," Kage said, stepping in front of me and pushing open the door.

Bright light spilled out. I stepped in behind him, then froze. A man was hanging from the ceiling, wrists chained to a rusted hook on a meat rail. His bare feet dangled inches above a steel vat bubbling with some kind of thick, chemical liquid.

"What the fuck?" I muttered.

"Choyce," Honor called out from across the room.

He stood beside a woman tied to a chair, doing everything she could to scream through the gag in her mouth.

"This is your definition of fun?" I asked, already knowing we had vastly different views of the word.

"I figured since we're working together on that other thing, it was best you saw how I handle shit when muthafuckas start to fuck with the people I love."

Honor spoke so casually, like he was talking about dinner plans, and not a fucking execution.

"Who are they?" Kage asked.

"The nigga waiting to be dunked is Rakim. He's been trying to kill Crown. And this," he nodded toward the chair, "Is his mother, Mary."

"Shouldn't Crown be here for this?" I asked.

"No," he answered, sharp and final.

"Okay, but if Rakim's the one causing problems, why do you have his mother?"

Honor didn't blink. "Closure. Rakim caused a rift between my family and me. Isn't that right, Rakim?"

He walked toward the dangling man, who was somehow still alive.

"This all happened because I didn't do my due diligence. I should've killed every muthafucka tied to that nigga Sincere. That was my mistake, but one I won't make twice."

He paced slowly.