Page 8

River Ashland

A lmost an hour later, Crown had finally pulled up to my building. I yawned, feeling mentally exhausted, and had every intention of taking a shower and going straight to bed. My head throbbed thanks to today's events, and my mood was sour.

"Are you staying the night?" I asked Crown.

"It's on you. Let me know what you want me to do."

He glanced in my direction with his dark eyes illumining in love.

I knew how Crown felt about me. He made sure I didn't go a day without knowing.

Neither of us officially said those words yet, but I didn't need to hear them to know it was how he felt.

Crown's love exuded from him at all times.

It was in the linger of his skin against mine.

The way his eyes sat low with my image filling his pupils.

It was in the words he chose when talking to me and the patience he showed whenever I was in a mood.

Crown's love was embedded in everything he did concerning me.

I often felt overwhelmed by it, but I did my best to play it off to avoid having that conversation.

"Four," he spoke.

"Um, yeah, you can stay."

"Ight. Think about what you wanna eat. I had reservations, but I'm not in the mood to fuck with it tonight."

Crown got out of the car and then rounded the front to open the door for me. I placed my hand in his, allowing him to gently pull me out. We walked through the parking garage hand in hand, entering my building from the back entrance.

"What is that?"

We entered, and on the floor were dark blue spots that could have been flower petals, but I wasn't sure.

"Crown, you don't see this?" I asked, staring at him with a narrowed gaze. The closer we got to the elevator, the more the navy-blue color covered the floor.

"Pick it up and see what it is." He shrugged.

"Fine, but I'ma tell the management company on Reggie for not doing his job. Why he let someone throw?—"

I bent down to grab the dark blue markings, and sure enough, it was a rose petal, but it felt fake. I turned it over and gasped as I read the ivory writing.

"Six months down, forever to go." As I rose to my feet, Crown grabbed me, pinning me to the elevator doors.

"You did this?" I held the petal in his face, making sure he knew exactly what I was talking about.

"Happy six months, Four." He grinned.

Unable to contain myself, I smashed my lips against his. Inhaling his scent, my eyes fluttered shut as I fed him my moans. His fingers found their way to my curls and massaged my scalp. Kissing him harder, nastier, I pressed my body into his in hopes of morphing into his skin.

"Four," he growled, jerking my head back. My curls filled his fist, and his tongue swept along my throat. Pecking along my jaw, Crown left me panting for air, my clit throbbing to be touched.

"Four, how you gon' get freaky behind some funky ass petals?" He chuckled, sinking his teeth into the dip between my neck and shoulder.

"It was unexpected," I cooed.

"Yeah, but a nigga gotta put in work if you gon' get nasty. You deserve more than some fucking petals."

"You say that like you're not the one who covered my lobby in them."

"Nah, I say it like a nigga who knows you deserve more."

"Is there more?"

"Press the button for the elevator and find out."

Crown sloppily made love to my mouth. His tongue dipped between my lips.

I nibbled on his tip, then sucked. Gripping my curls tighter, he reared my head back more.

I opened my mouth, ready to receive him.

My tongue curled toward my chin as spit slipped from his mouth to mine.

Swallowing his essence, I shook my curls free of his grasp.

I reached around him to hit the elevator button, then pushed him inside as the doors opened.

His back slammed against the elevator wall, and my chest slammed into his.

"Crown," I breathed.

"Wassup, Four?"

"I—" the words were right there, but as I thought to say them, my throat went dry with fear sweeping along my body.

Our eyes danced as he followed mine. What I wanted to say was right there, literally.

I heard it echoing in my mental space, but each time I parted my lips to speak, nothing but a sharp gasp fell through.

"Four."

Our eyes never left each other, but I wasn't present until he called my name.

"Cortez," I matched his breathless tone, hoping he filled the awkward space with jokes instead of feelings.

"You good?"

"I'm fine."

"Hmm." He nodded, scratching along his beard.

While most men liked their beards to extend out from their faces, Crown kept his cut low, and I loved it. I replaced his fingers with mine, running them along both sides of his face.

"That shit feels good."

I giggled and continued until the elevator dinged and the doors opened.

Before letting me walk off, Crown pulled me into him, kissing me deeply, speaking without words what we both knew to be true.

He pecked my lips once more, then reached his arm out to keep the door from closing.

I walked off, feeling defeated and confused.

My body literally felt all the feels whenever I was with Crown and even when I wasn't. Any time a man tried to talk to me, I flashed my ring, stopping them before they got started.

On the inside, all the makings of a woman falling in love were there, but that's where my heart kept them.

It refused to fully give itself to another because my heart belonged to the dead.

Turning the corner toward my apartment, I looked behind me at Crown.

It was unlike him not to hold my waist as we walked toward my apartment.

Hell, it was unlike us not to be touching at all.

Neither of us could go a few minutes without being skin-to-skin in some way.

However, the somber look on his handsome face said a lot.

Crown was hurt by my lack of words or giving me the space he knew I needed.

I sighed, wondering if I should let Crown go so he could be happy with someone else.

Hurting him was the last thing I wanted to do.

More than anything, I wanted to give in to what I felt for him.

Like a caged bird, I fluttered around my feelings in hopes of one day setting them free.

Sincere was dead. I watched his body lower into the ground, so I knew he wasn't coming back.

Moving on from the greatest love I've known seemed impossible and unfair.

Why did I deserve to move on when he couldn't? This was why I switched niggas out every six months.

Once the honeymoon phase settled in relationships, feelings and talks about the future were the next step.

Crown spoke about our future since we've met, but it was different now.

"Did you think about what you want to eat?" he asked as I stuck the key into the lock.

"Sushi sounds good. I know you only like the mango rolls that never fill you up. Maybe we can order sushi and wing?—"

I stepped inside my apartment, and the romantic ambiance stole my words, replacing them with tears.

Balloons and streamers in the prettiest shades of blue and ivory cascaded from the ceiling.

Tea light candles were scattered throughout, their flickering flames casting a soft, amber glow against the walls and furniture.

My heart hiccupped as Crown gently nudged me further inside, bringing me within arm's reach of the centerpiece that left me in awe.

In the center of my living room stood a stunning, four-foot-tall, heart-shaped floral arrangement.

The flowers were all different shades of blue, reminiscent of the ocean just before sunset.

The petals were soft and smelled amazing.

A few of the darker petals stood out the most. They were arranged in a way that was meant to convey a message.

I took a few steps back and started boo-hoo crying, realizing what the navy-colored petals spelled out: C+F

Feeling Crown's arms wrap around me brought on more tears. He buried his face in the crook of my neck, his beard tickling me as he laughed.

"It's not funny," I sniffled.

"It is. Who would've thought you were a crybaby?"

Turning in his arms, I faced him and did my best to keep a straight face. "I'm not a crybaby!"

Crown pinched my chin, and that was all it took for the tears to start up again.

"You're my crybaby." Pecking my lips, Crown licked away my tears as I laughed uncontrollably, begging him to stop.

"Ight, I'm done." He chortled.

"I can't believe you did this for me."

"It's our anniversary."

"Yeah, but it's only been six months."

"The best six months of my fucking life," he proudly boasted.

"How do you know?" I teased.

"'Cause I captured our moments together without you realizing."

"Huh?"

"Pick up the balloons on the floor." He smirked.

I was so caught up in everything else that I never once looked at the balloons all over my living room. I picked up one closest to my foot and turned it over to see a picture of me sleeping in the bed with my bridesmaid dress thrown across the foot of the bed, taped to it.

"You were knocked out that night. I watched you sleep for like two hours before I snapped this picture."

"Why were you watching me sleep?"

"Honestly, I had to make sure your ass ain't try to run away."

"Why would I run?"

"I scare you. The life and love I'm willing to give you puts fear in your heart."

"And you're okay with that?"

"Hell no." He frowned. "I never wanna be the reason fear finds you, but I understand. When you're ready, you'll let me in."

I nodded, then grabbed more balloons to see what other pictures Crown snapped.

They included us in matching pjs for Valentine's Day, us after losing at an escape room, me while I'm racing, more of me sleeping, and way too many to name.

Crown had really taken the time to document our journey together while I was aloof to the whole thing.

The last balloon I picked up caused my mouth to hang open because this nigga was crazy.

"Why would you snap a picture of you eating my coochie?"

I tore the picture from the balloon and brought it to his face.

"Why the fuck not? You're my favorite meal. Between your legs has been one of the greatest moments of my life." Resting his hand on my throat, he summoned me toward him.

"Happy six-month anniversary, Four." His eyes hazed with a mixture of love and lust.

"Happy six-month anniversary, Crown."

Licking my lips, I dropped to my knees and pulled my favorite ten inches from his sweats.

"Do yo' shit then, Four." He grinned.

Opening my mouth, I brought his hand to my curls, then dropped my jaw.

"Fuck my throat, Cortez. I don't want to breathe."