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"I know these young men can be brash when it comes to how they love.

I can only imagine some of the nonsense that boy told you in the name of love but know that living your life again doesn't mean you're betraying what the two of you had.

Grief is just like a river. Endless, always in motion, never truly ending, and because of that, you can't stop living your life.

Love didn't die with Sincere, and neither did you.

Holding on to what was won't keep you safe from what's to come.

Let it go and embrace whatever happens next. "

Bursting into tears, I laid my head on his chest. His arms stretched around me, keeping me close.

Snot was sure to stain his shirt, but Rook didn't care, and that's what I loved about him.

Rook was understanding where my mother was logical.

I couldn't talk to her about Sincere's death because, in her eyes, Sincere shouldn't have been running the streets or dealing with her underaged daughter.

Without saying the words, she chalked Sincere's death up to karma.

"River, why did you—" Honey stopped mid-sentence, probably because of the way I was engulfed in Rook's bulky arms.

"Rook, what happened?"

"Nothing to worry your pretty little head about. Who is this gorgeous young woman we have here?"

I lifted my head to see who he was talking about, and sure enough, it was Kysre.

"Kysre," she answered evenly.

"Not a friendly one, I see." Rook chuckled.

I moved out of his arms and caught eyes with Honey.

"Don't," I mumbled before she could speak. "Let's just do a quick shot before the race."

"You shouldn't be drinking before the race, River," Kysre advised, coming to stand next to me.

"Listen to her, River," Rook added. "If racing is too much for you, then bow out or let one of the other BBs handle it."

"I'm fine. Kysre, you're riding with me."

"What happened to Crown?" Honey asked.

I shrugged, not knowing and not giving a fuck. Honey and I said goodbye to Rook, and Kysre gave him a tight-lipped smile. The three of us walked back to my car, not saying a word about what they had walked up on.

"Kysre, bring River's car to the starting line," Honey instructed, taking my keys from me to toss to Kysre.

Kysre did what she was asked, and as she pulled off, Honey moved in close. "Are you sure you're okay to race?"

"I'm fine!"

"You're not. I don't think you should race. Let Kysre handle it."

"No. I'm racing, and that's it."

Backing away, Honey eyed me as I headed for the start. I was tired of feeling like I was in a never-ending free fall and waiting for my body to hit the ground. Tonight, I wanted to be free of it all. I glanced at my phone one last time before locking the screen and shoving it into my pocket.

He's not coming.

The words haunted me as disappointment settled in. Crown had never missed one of my races, and the fact that he was missing the one I didn't even want to do, but he told me I should, was crazy. I got in my car, got settled, and then closed my eyes, whispering, "Guide me back home safe and sound."

"You got this, River," Kysre encouraged.

I smiled at her, waiting for the reassurance her words were meant to give to set in. I rolled my shoulders back, fighting off the tension, forcing out slow breaths.

Focus.

"River, I didn't know you were back to wearing contacts?" Kysre randomly said.

"Huh?"

"Contacts," she repeated. "I found them under my seat. I dropped my lip gloss and was looking for it."

I grabbed the contacts from her hands, barely listening to how she found them. I took my glasses off, asking Kysre to hold them for me as I popped in my contacts. I blinked a few times, waiting for them to settle.

"You really gonna drive with them in?" Kysre asked.

"Yup. Nervous?" I teased.

"Never. Not with you at the wheel."

We locked B's and then faced forward as the crowd began to shift. Across from me, my opponent sat tucked away in her car, smirking in my direction, convinced she already won. Out the corner of my eye, a familiar face caught my attention. I turned for a better look, but he was already gone. Brushing off what I might’ve saw, I smiled at my opponent.

If only she knew, her pockets would be a few grand short this evening.

Kyree, in her leather Briar Beauty jacket, stepped into the space between both cars and lifted her arms. I gripped the wheel, feeling like a new woman.

Kyree introduced my opponent with a few dry words that barely got the crowd going.

I snickered because they should have known better than to go against me.

"On the right, they call her River, 'cause just like water, she's fucking unstoppable!"

The crowd went crazy at the mention of my name, giving me a rush. I was ready. No more thinking. No emotions. It was just me and the road.

"Y'all know how this goes. When the flag drops, them engines better purr. The first one back takes the cash."

Kyree raised the flag, then stalled. The empty space between the flag and the ground was where I left my anxiety. Then it fell, and our engines came to life. I surged forward, leaving my opponent in the dust. This was a sure win. My car growled like a beast as I mashed the gas.

"Let's fucking go, River! Big muthafuckin' Four!" Kysre hyped me.

She continued on, but my excitement had quickly fizzled.

Something was wrong. The wheel was loosening.

My hands gripped it tighter, but the car wasn't in my control.

Panic shot through me as I saw the guardrail come up too fast. My stomach dropped, everything slowing down in a split-second, the world narrowing into a blur of streetlights, rubber screeching, and Kysre screaming my name.

I yanked the wheel, but the back end of my car whipped around, throwing us into a spin I couldn't stop.

Then I heard it, the force of the impact rattling through my bones.

"Kysre," I groaned.

My vision dimmed, a rush of dizziness clouding my senses.