Page 41 of Delayed Intention

The Clinic

I did not sleep for shit. My significant arousal from that kiss and my lack of willingness to do anything about it led to a night of staring at the ceiling.

I felt guilty even considering taking matters into my own hands.

We are going to work in the clinic this morning and I rise early to make breakfast. Stacking pancakes and veggie bacon on a platter, I sense Lily entering the room before she says anything.

She looks like she did not sleep any better than I did. She appears rumpled and adorable.

“Good morning. I made us some breakfast and coffee is over there.” I point with my head.

“Thanks, Josh.”

“Do you want to borrow some scrubs or anything?”

“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks.”

God, she is sexy as hell without even trying. I start reciting the cranial nerves and their functions in my my mind to keep from writing checks I can’t cash. She shuffles over to the coffee pot. I grab a plate of food and take it back to my room to eat in peace.

Once I scarfed down my food, I shower and throw some scrubs on, pulling out my smallest pair for her.

Going to the guest room door, I knock and get no answer.

She’s probably in the shower . I consider leaving the scrubs on the floor outside her room.

If she’s still in the shower, I can put the scrubs right inside her door and stop creeping outside her room like an asshole.

I try knocking one last time. Suddenly, she opens the door.

My hand freezes before I knock her in the sternum.

She is standing there, hair in a shower cap, and clothed only in a towel.

“Here.” I shove the clothes into her chest and turn around to make a hasty retreat away from the sound of her laughter. She is going to kill me.

“I’m taking Ginger with us but am going to walk her a bit first. I’ll be back for you in a few,” I say without turning around.

“Sure thing Josh. I will go ahead and get dressed,” I can hear the continued amusement in her voice.

Escaping out into the cold without zipping up my coat, I’m hoping to freeze out my libido. When I return, she has dressed and somehow looks even more appetizing in my scrubs. She is lacing up her boots when I open the door.

“I packed us some snacks and sandwiches,” she says.

“Great. Ready?”

She finishes up her boots and stands, looking me in the eye. “Absolutely.”

It is bright and quiet outside, with a good three feet of fresh snow on the ground.

We trudge along the half-plowed street. The weather’s taking a break for now, but the snow is due to start up again later today.

She follows me in silence, and while I hope no one’s in distress, I do hope we are busy today.

I need a distraction. I think we both do.

There is a line of patients outside the clinic when we arrive.

Since no one looks critical, I don’t feel too guilty about my pleasure seeing them there.

We open the front doors, and I set up the exam rooms while Lily gets busy around the front of the office.

Fortunately, the clinic uses an electronic medical record system Lily has worked with before, so we can be more efficient than I could be on my own.

Lily and I take turns processing patients and building the schedule.

She takes them to a room, and gets their vitals and history before signing each one over to me.

I examine and treat them as we go. There is one can opener injury requiring sutures, but mostly, it’s URI symptoms that only need symptomatic management.

The clinic nebulizer gets some use, and we dispense several prescriptions for cough syrup with and without codeine.

By the time we saw the tenth patient, I noticed there was no one else waiting.

This takes us to midday, and we sit down and eat some food after Lily brews a pot of coffee. We are eating in companionable silence until I’m the first to break it.

“Good idea bringing the sandwiches.”

“Thanks.”

“We make a pretty efficient team.”

“Josh?” She pauses, so I look at her. “Are you disappointed there aren’t more patients for us to see?” The moment the words are out of her mouth, she looks sorry she asked; at least I assume that is why she starts to blush, turning her cheeks a soft pink.

“I mean, I don’t mind keeping busy.”

“What I’m asking is if you’re afraid to be alone with me without a movie or patients to see.”

I huff out a laugh that I can tell sounds like bullshit. “Don’t be ridiculous.” Although, honestly, it’s like she read my mind.

“If you were writing me a letter about how you’re feeling right now or what you’re thinking, what would you say?”

Without stopping to think of the consequences, I answer honestly. “I would say you scare me a little and I would be more comfortable if we had an office full of patients.”

Then, proving she is still capable of surprising the hell out of me she starts laughing. Really, honest to God, fully belly-laughing at me, tears streaming down her face before she finally composes herself enough to croak out, “I knew it.”

“I’m so glad you find me amusing,” I try to look stern, but know I’m not managing.

She throws out her paper plate and gets up to fix herself a cup of coffee. “You know there is a simple solution to your nerves.” Her back is to me, so I can’t read her expression.

“Really?”

“Sure.” She turns and looks at me while blowing off the steam emanating from her mug, drawing my attention to her lips. She appears calm as she leans back on the counter behind her.

Making a decision that was likely made for me at the diner, if not before, I swallow. “And how’s that?”

She sets down her coffee cup and walks toward me.

“Lily.” I try for a warning tone, but even I can hear that my voice lacks conviction, just like the rest of me. My first wild thought is that she is going to straddle me right in this chair. That would eliminate any possibility of hiding my arousal from her.

So much for holding out for common sense. Instead, she takes my hand, pulling me up to stand. Also, hiding nothing, of course.

As if reading my mind Lily says, “I had considered straddling you right there on that chair, but I think I’d lose all control if I start with a move like that.” I am so shocked by how in tune we are, I stand there, just looking at her face. Her beautiful face.

“Lily, you need to promise me, you understand I am not the man you fall in love with. Tell me you hear me?” I am pleading, but somewhere inside, I’m fully aware her answer will not matter at this point. I do not know when it happened, but I am hooked. Everything about her is drawing me in.

Her eyes are golden brown in the light of the room, and she looks at me with so much trust I’m certain I don’t deserve.

Her hair is braided into a low knot on the back of her head, with loose strands floating wildly around her face.

Her straight nose, her glowing, blushing cheeks, and her full lips seem to be moving toward me in slow motion.

Her figure is begging me to take hold of her.

Damn . I do believe I’ve nearly lost the power to choose any path that doesn’t lead to kissing the hell out of her.

“Lily Anna, I need to hear you say it,” I croak out, pretending that there is more than one path before me.

“You do not do relationships. I hear you.” She’s standing so close but has not moved to touch me.

“As long as you hear me,” I’m drowning in her gaze.

“You called me Lily Anna again,” she whispers.

“This is going to be fucked, you know that?” Until now, I’ve managed to keep my hands to myself but feel pulled into her as if she were my complimentary magnet.

She bridges the last gap, putting her arms around my neck. “I certainly hope so.”

With that, I put my arms around her lower back and pull her flush against me with a groan of surrender mixed with desire.

I am searching her face for any indication that she realizes this was a terrible idea and we should stop now before it is too late.

Instead, she relaxes and melds right into me, like she was made to fit there.

She pushes her hips against mine, and a small groan escapes my lips, which makes her smile.

Her eyes close as she gently brushes her lips against mine.

That is all the invitation I need. I pull her by the waist into me before I flip us, turning her around to press her hips against the closest counter.

I begin kissing her back with an urgency that doesn’t surprise me at all at this point.

We have been building to this inevitable outcome for days.

Maybe for years if the force of my lust is any sign.

My lips are brushing roughly over hers before she gently sucks on my lower lip, giving it a small nip of her teeth.

I heard a whimper before I recognized it was from me.

Pushing the full and obvious firmness of my groin against her, she lets out a small moan before her lips start to open, parting for me.

The bell chimes above the door and we spring apart, without breaking eye contact.

After trailing her eyes below my waist, she smirks, “Let me go see what the next patient needs, doctor.” Then she winks slowly at me before heading out to the front office.

Kill me dead.

I adjust the front of my pants while I hear her start speaking to someone out in the waiting room.

Lily, The Clinic, The Same Day

My heart is racing when I make my way to the lobby, flushed from the kiss combined with the adrenaline of being bold for a change.

However, when there appears to be a state trooper in the front office, my rapid heart rate goes into overdrive.

He’s not what I was expecting, as he doesn’t look like a patient.

He’s tall, blonde, and dressed in an olive parka over what looks to be a blue uniform shirt paired with khaki pants.

“Mam.” He takes his hat off and holds it to his chest in a gesture I’m pretty sure I’ve only seen before in films.

“How may I help you, officer?”

“I was just stopping in to warn you that the weather’s picking back up. It may be best to close the clinic and head home for the day. Are you here with Dr. Hendricks?”

“No, she couldn’t make it in. I’m here with Dr. Joshua Cohen—you know him?”

“Sure, I know Josh. Small town, you know?” The officer smiles.

I can feel myself blushing now when I hear footsteps approach from behind me.

“Hey Oliver, how’s it going?” I hear Josh’s voice as he reaches his hand across the front desk.

“Josh.” He nods, hat still held to his chest, as he steps forward to shake Josh’s hand. “I was just advising your colleague here,” he nods his head in my direction, “that the weather’s picking up. It may be time to call it a day.”

“Ah, okay. I think we’re all finished here anyway. Thanks.”

“You both are okay to get home?” He is looking back and forth at us now for an answer—until he smiles in a way that suggests there may be a vibe. You have no idea, Officer Oliver. “We’ll be fine. Don’t have far to go. Thanks for checking in.”

“Alright then.” He places his hat back on and nods to me again. “Have a good evening.”

When the officer opens the clinic door, the contrast between the darkness of the afternoon sky and the light inside the lobby is striking.

It is amazing how much the weather can change here within a moment.

As the door closes, I get a glimpse of the snow coming down hard and gusts of wind blowing drifts around.

I turn back to Josh. “I guess we better pack it up.”

He nods. “I’ll turn off the coffee and the lights if you want to grab the rest of our things.”

“Right.” The sky is making me nervous, and I move quickly. We trudge home and, thank God, there are no cars on the road at this point. Josh has to carry Ginger the entire way so we don’t lose her in the snow.

We get in the door, and Ginger shakes herself while I peel off my coat, hat, and gloves.

After getting my boots off, I make my way to the living room.

I pull off my scrub top, leaving me in the long underwear I had worn underneath.

As I start to undo my hair from the low knot and shake out the snow, I feel Josh’s arms start to encircle me from behind as his lips come close to the side of my neck.

He pauses before completing the embrace, his arms suspended.

He whispers, “Is this, okay?” His breath sends goosebumps down my entire right side.

“It’s more than okay.” The words are barely passed through my lips before I feel him pull the back of me into him, kissing me from just below my ear down the right side of my neck.

I spin around in his arms, and we briefly make eye contact before locking our lips together again.

We eventually make it over to the sofa and are making out for the better part of a half hour when my stomach starts to growl.

It is so loud that we both stop and laugh while I bury my face in his chest.

“I guess we should put a pin in this and eat something,” he says.

“Yeah. And it is your turn to pick a movie,” I say, collapsing against him.

He kisses the top of my head while holding me close. I can feel how hungry I am, now that my stomach has announced it, but more than that I am so comfortable here, laying on top of him. I stack my hands on his chest and rest my chin there so I can look him in the eye.

“Maybe something we’ve seen before, so we have plenty of chances to distract each other after we eat?”

He smiles at me. “That sounds amazing.”

“It does, doesn’t it?”