Page 61 of Your Last First Kiss

“Me too—I’m drooling over this stew. Does your mom always cook this well?”

Pride shows in Kai’s squared shoulders. “Most of the time. She makes this one thing, pasta fugly or something, and it’s so gross, but she says it’s good for us.”

It’s good for them, and it’s cheap to make. But I don’t say that. I roll my eyes and dig into my stew that’s getting cold because I can’t stop staring at our guest.

“Is that right?” Dillon asks with a twinkle in his eyes.

“It’s pasta fagioli, and it’s not gross. It’s…it just has a lot of canned beans in it,” I explain.

“Beans, beans,” Gage sings from the other room, and I drop my forehead into my hands.

Dillon laughs but finishes the song. “The more you—”

“Hey,” I say, lifting my head quickly. “Don’t encourage them.”

“Toot,” comes a chorus of giggles from the other room just as the baby starts to cry. She hasn’t slept long enough. That means she’ll either go right back down, or it will be a very long night for me.

“How come Aster hasn’t come to pick them up yet?” Kai grumbles, and my heart pinches. I know he loves his sisters dearly. But he doesn’t love that his sisters’ parents take advantage every chance they get.

“If all she has is the space heater, it isn’t safe for Mari,” I say, placing a hand on his forearm.

I stand to get Mari but pause at the door when Kai clears his throat.

“I know,” he grumbles. “I just…” Kai lifts his head and stares at Dillon like he forgot he was there. It happened to me earlier too. It’s almost like he belongs here, and we forget. We forget that we’re holding other people’s secrets that fill us with shame.

Dillon watches him with nothing but patience and understanding. “People are flawed, Kai. All of us. It’s how we hold ourselves accountable that matters. We can blame and shame and fight all we want, but at the end of the day, we can only do what we think is right. It seems like that’s what your mom does every day.”

That response makes me melt into a pool right in front of him.

“Yeah,” Kai says with a wobble in his voice that sounds fragile.

“And just today, I’ve seen you do it too. You and your mom are making one heck of a family here. Your sisters are lucky to have you.”

Kai’s shoulders inflate at the compliment. It’s like Dillon’s words filled him with every ounce of confidence he’s been missing.

A tear trickles down my cheek, and I quickly swipe it away, but Dillon watches it with a pinched brow.

He always sees me.

I duck my head and hurry to scoop up Mari and bring her to the pack ’n play set up in my bedroom.

This entire night has been a lot. Dillon in my home, in my space and life in a way I never thought would be possible, has my mind a muddled mess of worries.

What if I let him in and he leaves?

What if I let him in and he doesn’t?

What if I let him in and the kids don’t approve?

Laughter rings out downstairs, and I hear them all singing about magical fruit. Dillon is the loudest of them all.

Or maybe, it’s that I’m so in tune with everything Dillon Henry that his voice rises above all the others like he’s singing straight to my heart.

He wants to be my last first kiss. How can that one statement start to mend the bits of my heart still shredded by broken promises?

CHAPTER19

PENNY