Page 121 of Your Last First Kiss

Dillon’s face lights up at Gage’s excitement. “Well, it’s Grandparents Day. I figured I could at least play the part.”

Peeking around the door, I take in the full picture, and I laugh despite myself. He looks like he went thrift shopping at Remy’s boutique. His pants are at least three inches too short and four sizes too big. He has suspenders holding them up over a flannel shirt that looks surprisingly good on him.

But it’s his face that keeps me frozen on the spot. He’s wearing a pair of glasses I’m reasonably sure he doesn’t need, and he has white powder falling onto his shoulders. But it’s the dark circles under his puffy eyes that match my own that cause my heart to riot against my chest cavity.

I’m hurting him too.

“Did you— Did you put baby powder in your hair?” I finally ask.

“Good morning, Wednesday Girl.” He hands me a large coffee. I’ve never wanted to smile and cry at the same time as much as I do right now. Is that a thing? Maybe a smry? “I know it’s not Wednesday, but you’re going into the city today, and I told Miller I’d handle the girls so…”

He shrugs but hesitates on the porch.

Remembering myself, I move out of the way and let him in.

“Are you really coming to my school today?” Gage asks, bouncing on his toes.

“If that’s okay with you,” Dillon says.

“Heck yeah! Oh, man. Everyone’s going to be so jelly. I gotta go eat. We cannot be late today.” He darts off toward the kitchen, and I know I’ll be cleaning up cereal for a week, but I can’t bring myself to care.

“What are you doing here?” My voice doesn’t know which emotion it wants to share, and the words come out in a mangled mess.

“Yeah, what are you doing here?” Kai demands from the stairs behind me.

It’s like a switch flipped in him overnight. He’s been a little standoffish with Dillon, but he’s never been outright rude before. If I didn’t know better, I would have even said he liked Dillon a few days ago.

Maybe Dillon’s right about therapy. Kai’s anger needs a target, which seems to be painted on me and Dillon right now.

Dillon takes it in stride, though. He crosses his arms over his chest with a small frown forming on his face. He looks ridiculous and utterly perfect at the same time.

“I’m here because I made a promise—”

“And you keep your promises, yada yada yada. Yeah. I’ve heard that before.”

“Kaiser. That’s enough. In this house we choose kindness, and if you cannot think of something nice to say then you will keep your mouth shut.”

My son glares at Dillon and mimes locking his lips.

“You’re right. You have heard it before. At some point, you’ll have to stop blaming your father and take responsibility for your own life, and maybe then you’ll realize that not everyone will disappoint you.”

“You’re a dick,” Kai spits.

“Kaiser.” I suck in a sharp breath and my heartbeat rushes in my ears. This isn’t my son. “Go to your room and be prepared to hand over your phone. You’re grounded.”

He stomps up the stairs, complaining the entire way about my loyalties.

When I think I can keep my composure, I turn back to Dillon. “I’m so—”

“Don’t do it, Penny. You do not need to apologize for him. He’ll do it when he’s ready. He’s a good kid going through a rough time. He doesn’t know how to believe in me yet, but I will keep showing up until I’ll prove to him that I’m not going anywhere.”

My chin trembles, but if I allow myself to break now, I may never be able to fix myself again. I stare at him and the shadows hiding behind his eyes.

Do I look as lost as he does?

“Until we figure out a way forward, we will continue with our plans. But as…” He swallows hard, like he’s forcing down a rotten egg. “But as friends.”

“What does that mean?”