Page 150 of Your Last First Kiss
“I get it,” I say. “The littles call me Dewey, but I understand that’s easier for them. You’re older, and you’ve had more life experiences. It would be like me suddenly calling Remy dad or grandpa.”
“Dewey doesn’t feel right,” he agrees. “But it’s hard. I know you love me like a dad is supposed to. You’re a dad in all the ways that matter. I don’t know why it feels so weird to call you Dad. Sometimes, like in there, it’s weird to call you Dillon too though.”
“Kai.” I heave a deep exhale. “I don’t care what you call me, or how you introduce me. All that matters to me is that you know how much I love you.”
“I do,” he grumbles.
“Then how you introduce me doesn’t matter. Introduce me as your dad, your stepdad, or your Dillon. It’s no one’s business how our family works as long as it does work. And sometimes it will be easier to say this is my stepdad or dad. Sometimes Dillon will work better. But however you introduce me, just know this—you will not upset me, nor will you hurt my feelings because I know how you feel about me. That is all that matters, okay?”
He nods and runs a hand through his mop of hair. “Yeah, okay. Thanks, Dillon.”
“You got it, kid. Now, tell me about Lilly.”
Kai’s face turns an unflattering shade of red, so I put the SUV in drive and pull out onto the street before he begins talking.
“I like her,” he says shyly, and I flash him a knowing smile.
“Good. I’m happy for you then. And I’m always here if you have any, er, questions. Okay?”
“I know, Dillon. Thanks.”
This family gig is the best thing I’ve ever done, and sometimes it’s also the hardest. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.
* * *
Penny
“Tellme again why we’re hiking out to the lake?” I ask. Dillon leads the way with Mari in the backpack carrier while the boys help Lia keep up behind us.
“Because,” Dillon calls over his shoulder, “Remy bought a houseboat he plans to live in. I promised him we’d come to see it.”
He pops his third root beer barrel into his mouth, and unease worms into my gut. It’s been a long time since he’s used that particular crutch.
“What’s he going to do in the winter? The lake will eventually freeze over,” I say to break the silence that fills my mind with anxiety.
Dillon turns to flash a wicked grin. “Guess we’ll find out.”
It’s not a long or even a difficult hike now that they’ve put in a dirt driveway, but I’m not exactly dressed for it in my sundress and flip-flops.
We reach the clearing a few minutes later to find an empty shoreline. Dillon stands at the water’s edge with one hand blocking out the sun. The boys arrive next to me with Lia a second later.
“Looks like they’re in the middle of the lake,” Kai says, pointing toward the water.
I squint and still only see shadows. The sun is so stinking bright.
Kai drops his backpack and after digging through it, comes up with a pair of binoculars. He looks through them, then gives a thumbs up.
Before I can ask what he’s doing, he says, “Yup, they’re out there. Look, Mom. Miller’s waving a sign at you.”
“What? Why would he have a sign out there?”
“Who knows? It is Miller we’re talking about,” Dillon grumbles.
“Look, Mom.” Kai shoves the binoculars into my hands.
It takes me more than a few seconds to get the dang things to focus, but when I do, I follow the outline of the houseboat until I find Miller, Izzy, and Remy on the deck, waving wildly.
Miller’s holding his own binoculars and waves at me, so I wave back. “He’s such a goofball.” I laugh. Then I see that he’s pointing to Remy and Izzy, so I scan to my right.
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