Page 121 of When Ben Loved Tim

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I’m on a double-date! Allison and I have been dreaming of this since junior high. And now it’s actually happening! Persuading my closeted boyfriend to go along with the idea had taken some doing. An hour-long blowjob to be specific, and yes, Tim actually timed it. Even without the bribery, I think he’s genuinely enjoying himself on this date. Although an outsider might mistake him for a hired bodyguard, considering the way he keeps scanning the mall for anyone he might know.

“What do you think?” I ask him, holding a shirt with a busy pattern to my chest.

“Looks good,” Tim says distractedly, his gaze elsewhere in the department store.

I grab the summer dress that Allison has been carrying around and drape it over my chest. “What about this one?”

Tim’s eyes flick toward me and away again. “I like yellow.”

My face twists up. Yellow has never looked good on me! And I doubt a sleeveless dress would either.

“I wanna see you both try it on,” Ronnie says. “Grab another. Let’s have a beauty pageant.”

“Do it, Ben!” Allison says. “It would be so fun!”

“I don’t want to give him any ideas,” I say, tilting my head toward my boyfriend, “or he’ll have me dressing up as a girl each time we go out.”

“Huh?” Tim says, looking at everyone in our little group while catching up with the conversation. His attention settles on me. “Hey, thatisa good idea! We’ll get you a wig. It’ll be hot!”

“I’m getting a little turned on just thinking about it,” Ronnie murmurs.

“For real,” Tim replies with a grin.

“Okay, never mind,” Allison says, snatching the dress from me. “I donotneed extra competition.”

Just as well. I tried on my sister’s clothes once, when I was still figuring everything out, and didn’t feel anything but awkward. “You know whatwouldbe cute,” I say innocently. “If we put our men in matching outfits.”

“You’re a genius!” Allison says, turning toward a rack of clothes.

Ronnie recoils at the suggestion. “That would be so lame!” He nudges Tim. “Nothing personal. I’ve just got my own style.”

“Hey, I’m right there with you,” Tim replies.

“Doesn’t matter,” Allison says, considering a leather jacket before returning it to the rack. “It’s gonna happen.”

Our boyfriends are good sports as we walk around the department store, assembling an outfit that includes a pink button up shirt, a white bow tie, and soft gray slacks.

“This relationship just became abusive,” Ronnie says, shaking his head as we corral them toward the dressing rooms.

“You’re going to look hot,” Allison assures him.

“I don’t know how to put on a bow tie,” Ronnie says while peering at it.

“I’ll help.” Allison winks at me before dragging him into one of the private booths.

“She always has been my inspiration,” I say, taking Tim’s hand to pull him into another.

He tenses at the public display of affection, but when we’re safe in the dressing room, he finally seems to relax.

“Better get out of all those clothes,” I say, leaning against the wall to watch.

Tim smirks and strips off his T-shirt. He looks good. That’s no shock, although I do wish he hadn’t cut his silky black hair, which had gotten longer than my own. Now it’s back to the short gelled spikes he had when we first met. If that’s his preference, then so be it, but I worry that he only cut it to appease his father.

“Stop staring,” Tim says with his jeans bunched up around his ankles.

“How come?” I ask. “It’s not like I haven’t seen it all before.”