Page 21 of The Sun Sister

‘So,’ she continued, ‘have you done anything about your letter from Pa?’

‘I’ve never even opened the envelope, and to be honest, I can’t remember where I put it. It may be lost.’

‘Oh Electra!’ Ally gave me her best disapproving look. ‘You can’t be serious?’

‘Hey, it must be somewhere, I just haven’t bothered to find it.’

‘You really don’t want to know where you came from?’

‘No, I just can’t see the point. What does it matter? I’m who I am now.’

‘Well, it certainly helped me. And even if you don’t want to pursue what the letter contains, Pa’s written words were his last gift to all of us.’

‘Jesus Christ!’ I’d had enough. ‘You and our other sisters treat Pa as though he was some freakin’ god! He was just a guy who adopted us – for some weird reason that none of us actually knows!’

‘Please don’t shout, Electra, it upsets the baby, but I’m sorry if I—’

‘I’m going out for a walk.’

I stood up from the table, marched to the front door and pulled it open. Slamming it behind me, I walked across the lawns towards the jetty, wishing, as I always did after a few hours at Atlantis, that I’d never decided to come back here in the first place.

‘What is it with my sisters and Pa? He’s not even our biological father, for Chrissake!’

I continued to complain to myself as I sat down, feet dangling over the jetty, and tried to take some deep breaths. They didn’t work. Maybe another line would. I stood up and retraced my footsteps back to the house, tiptoeing inside and up the stairs so no one would hear me. In my room, I locked the door and took out what I needed.

A few minutes later, I was feeling far calmer. I lay back on my bed and pictured all my sisters in turn. For some reason, they appeared as Disney princesses, which was quite fun. They weren’t irritating at all when they looked like that, and I did love them, all except CeCe (she appeared suddenly as the witch inSnow White). I giggled and decided that was cruel, even for CeCe. I knew people said you couldn’t choose your family, only your friends, but Pahadchosen us and we were stuck with each other. Maybe the reason CeCe and I didn’t get on was because she wouldn’t put up with my crap like the others did. And she could shout louder than me too. The others would do anything to keep the peace, but she didn’t care. A bit like me...

My four older sisters had probably never thought about the fact that they all had each other – Ally and Maia, Star and CeCe – which had left me with Tiggy. It was she who I’d been bunched with as we were growing up – there were only a few months between us – and even though I really loved her, we couldn’t have been more different. It didn’t help that all my older sisters made it clear that their favourite younger sibling to play with was Tiggy, not me. Tiggy didn’t holler and scream and have tantrums all the time. She just sat on a lap, sucking her thumb and being perfect. As we’d grown up, I’d tried to bond with her because I was lonely, but all her spiritual shit drove me up the wall.

As the coke wore off, my sisters stopped being Disney princesses and became themselves again. What did it matter anyway? Now Pa was gone, we were just a bunch of disparate women who had been thrown together as kids, but were now going our separate ways. I took some breaths and tried to do as all my therapists had told me to, which was to analyse why I’d gotten so angry. And for a change, I thought I knew the reason: Ally had told me that all my sisters were happy – they had found lives with people who loved them. Even CeCe, who I’d always thought was as unlovable as me, had somehow managed to get over her weird obsession with Star and move on. More to the point, she had found her passion in art, something she had always loved.

And here was I, as usual the odd one out. Since Pa had died, I’d managed to find nothing except a new and more reliable dealer. Even though I was by far the most financially successful sister – from what my accountant said, I could stop work today and never worry about money again – what was the point when I hadn’t a clue what else I wanted to do?

There was a knock on my door.

‘Electra? Are you in there?’

It was Ally. ‘Yeah, come in.’

She did, with Bear in the crook of her arm.

‘I’m so sorry if I said something to upset you, Electra,’ she said, hovering in the doorway.

‘Listen, don’t worry about it. It’s not you, it’s me.’

‘Well, whatever, I am sorry. It’s so good to see you and I’m really glad you came. Do you mind if I sit down? He weighs a ton.’

‘Sure,’ I said with a sigh. The last thing I needed was to be trapped in my bedroom being interviewed by Ally.

‘I just wanted to share something with you, Electra. Something that Tiggy told me we should investigate.’

‘Oh yeah, what?’

‘Apparently, when she was here last month, she found a cellar with a secret lift that accessed it.’

‘Er...right. So?’

‘She said it was used to store wine, but she noticed there was a door hidden behind one of the racks. Maybe we should find out where it leads to.’