Page 96 of Shadowblood Souls: The Complete Series

Twenty-Six

Jacob

I wake up with a pounding ache in my head and a flutter of unfamiliar emotion in my chest. My pulse hitches in the second it takes me to orient myself.

I’m sprawled on a bed that’s rocking gently with the water that buoys this boat up. And Riva is lying next to me in the darkness, her fiercely sweet scent wrapped all around me.

My heart keeps thumping at its heightened rate. I lift myself gingerly into a sitting position and peer at her in the dim light that seeps through the bedroom’s small, curtained window.

Her petite body swathed in the covers I’m poised on top of, huddled with her back to me right at the far edge of the mattress.

As far as she could get from me without falling off the bed.

The ache in my head has retreated, but a new one winds around the base of my throat. I only vaguely remember insisting that I would stay in here with her.

Did she let me because she understood or because she was too worn out to argue about it?

I close my eyes. You are such a fucking prick, Jake.

The thrum of my blood through my veins pushes me toward her. Clamors at me to hug her close and prove to her how much she means to me.

But hugging her wouldn’t accomplish that. She’d flinch away the second I touched her.

The only time she’s willingly embraced me was when she felt she had to or I’d screw us all over.

My hands ball at my sides, my fingernails digging into my skin with pinpricks of pain.

My memories of the attack and our escape are hazy and disjointed, as much blaring anger and horror as any concrete imagery. But I remember the press of her lips against mine, the shock of elation and longing cutting through the savage emotions that were gripping me.

Elation and longing immediately tainted by my realization of how wildly my powers had been flailing around.

I saved us and then I practically called our attackers right back down on us. Nice work.

The thought sends a different sort of thrum through my body. The assholes who tried to gun us down are still out there.

They shot Riva. They almost killed her.

They wanted to.

My teeth set on edge, a surge of rage welling up inside me—the one emotion in me that’s comfortingly familiar.

I can’t change what’s already happened. I can’t undo all the shit I put this woman through.

I can’t make different decisions years ago. I can’t bring Griffin back to life.

But I sure as hell can make sure that anyone who’s tried to hurt Riva never gets a second chance.

This kind of rage, the slow-burning kind like a forge smoldering inside my soul, wafts a cuttingly frigid sort of fire. My thoughts harden with cold efficiency.

Every movement, every consideration narrows down to the goal in front of me. Every thud of my pulse propels me forward.

I slide off the bed, pick my pack off the floor where I dropped it, and stalk out of the bedroom without a sound.

As I tug the door shut behind me with a soft click, a form stirs on one of the bunks beneath the cabin stairs. Andreas gets up and squints through the dimness at me.

Yes, that’s perfect. He’s the one I need.

“Zian’s standing watch,” he whispers, tipping his head toward the deck above. “He just took over from me.”

“Where’s Dom?”

Drey motions to the other bedroom. “Out like a light. I think he needs all the sleep he can get after patching the rest of us up.”

I nod. “Can you stay awake a little longer?”

My friend studies me with a trace of hesitation that makes my gut twist. Though we’ve been there for each other through so much, his pause brings back all the ways I let him down too.

But all he says is, “What did you have in mind?”

I motion in the direction I think is toward land. “Those fake soldiers are out there. Probably still looking for us after I bashed up their city. I think we should find them first.”

“And then?”

A tight smile grips my mouth. “And then we make sure they never get anywhere near Riva again.”

Andreas swipes his hand back over his coiled hair. He doesn’t give me an immediate agreement, but the clench of his jaw tells me he’s on board.

“We shouldn’t leave her by her?—”

“Not all of us,” I say. “Just you and me. Zian can smack down anyone who comes at him, and Dom’ll be here if the worse comes to worst.”

Drey’s gaze slides over me again. “Are you sure you’re up to another fight?”

I adjust my weight, flexing my muscles to test them. A faint throbbing lingers inside my skull from how far I strained my powers this afternoon, and a twinge runs through my side where the bullet hit me.

It’s all distant compared to the vengeful chill warbling from that forge inside me.

“I’ve got most of my strength back. And what we’re going to do shouldn’t take too much of my power.”

One corner of Andreas’s mouth curls upward, and then I know I have him for sure.

“I distract them, and you knock ‘em down?”

A matching smirk crosses my face. “That’s the plan.”

He turns toward the stairs. “First we have to find them.”

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem.”

I pause to yank my sparse belongings out of my pack and stuff in a clear plastic trash bag the boat’s owner left crumpled in a corner. Then I climb the stairs after Andreas.

Zian glances over at me from where he’s staked out in front of the cabin, but I can tell from the acceptance in his face that Drey has already told him the gist of what we’re up to. He dips his head to me.

We leap out onto the rickety dock we tied the small yacht to and scramble up the rocky shoreline to this much more derelict section of the city. Down a dingy street, I spot a car that’s rusty and dented enough for me to be sure it has no alarm system.

“We go back to the scene of our ‘crime,’” I murmur to Andreas, heading toward the car. “At least some of them will be searching for us around there.”

And this late at night, the windows on the city’s buildings are nearly all dark, the streets around us empty. It shouldn’t be difficult to spot a squad of supposed soldiers marching around on patrol.

I pop the locks on the doors with a tug of my talent and twist the ignition the same way. As Drey drops into the split leather of the passenger seat, the engine rumbles to life.

I have a general sense of where we are relative to the part of the city we fled through earlier—approximately southwest. Easing on the gas, I pull away from the curb.

In the first few minutes, nothing crosses our path except a mangy dog that trots faster at the sight of us. The digital clock on the dash says it’s three thirty in the morning.

“We won’t want to get too close in the car,” Andreas says. “It’ll draw attention when the streets are so quiet.”

“This is just to get us closer fast enough that it’s still dark.”

We lapse back into silence. Drey runs his fingers over the mottled armrest.

A flicker of an image passes through my mind: his hand sliding over Riva’s dress as they danced together.

My own hands tighten around the steering wheel. For a second, my anger flares hot enough to cut through the chill that’s keeping me focused.

But the only one who deserves that anger is me.

“I’m sorry,” I say abruptly.

Andreas’s head snaps around. “What?”

“You tried to tell me I was fucking up. More than once. And I didn’t listen to you. And then, with Riva—I purposefully made what you did sound so much worse…”

Acid gnaws at my stomach as if I’ve poisoned myself. The part I hate most is that I don’t even know how much I really believed I was defending my friends in that moment and how much it was jealousy I was tamping down so hard I couldn’t even recognize it.

Andreas says nothing for long enough to leave me queasy. Then he swipes his hand over his face.

“We all messed up. We are all messed up. I know that I can’t even imagine how hard it’s been for you the past four years, without Griffin, believing she sold him and the rest of us out… And I know that I haven’t been able to do much to make it any easier.”

A splash of shame chases my guilt. “It wasn’t your job to make my life easier. I never expected?—”

“Of course you didn’t. I’m just saying I’m not holding any grudges. Were there a few moments in there when I wanted to punch you in the face? Sure. But I don’t think that would have fixed things any faster.”

His tone has turned lightly wry. He watches me as if to evaluate my reaction.

I swallow thickly. “Maybe not, but I bet it’d have been awfully satisfying. If you get the urge again, feel free to actually punch me.”

I tried to match his tone, but Drey has spent enough time in other people’s heads that he can be almost as perceptive as my twin was. He must be able to tell I’m serious.

“You already beat yourself up plenty without me adding to it, Jake.”

I don’t know what to say to that. Then the beam of a flashlight flickers across the street several blocks in the distance, and my foot jams on the brake.

“We’d better stop here.”

It’s easier, focusing on the mission I intend to carry out. Sinking down into the welcome simmering of icy fury, letting the searing chill carry me out of the car and stealing down the street.

Andreas keeps pace. We dodge the pools of light beneath the sporadic streetlamps, sticking to the thickest of shadows.

From some club or bar in the area, energetic bass is still pounding, distant to our ears. A laugh spills out of a high hotel window that’s open to the night breeze. A single car putters by.

Otherwise the night is still and silent. I wouldn’t be surprised if the supposed soldiers managed to clear most of the locals out, if any had wanted to still be up.

After seeing what I did to those buildings, maybe it wouldn’t have been too hard.

When I spot the gleam of the flashlight again, we’re only a couple of blocks away. The figure holding it is beyond our view.

We creep closer with even more care. My ears pick up the scrape of footsteps moving away from us down the cross-street.

Andreas stops me with a hand on my shoulder. “Let me take a look,” he says under his breath.