Page 121 of Shadowblood Souls: The Complete Series

Seven

Riva

I kill the first mouse.

I don’t mean to. I summon the furious vibration in my lungs, remembering the other guardians chasing us down, the cage-fights in the arena, the attacks of the monster hunters, and part my lips, letting only the thinnest shriek slip out.

But maybe the vicious thing inside me is too hungry after all the days it’s lain dormant. Or maybe other parts of me crave the rush of power a little more than I want to admit.

The scream jolts out of me faster than I intended. The mouse twitches and spasms, the flavor of its agony hitting me in a swift smack like a gulp of cold water on a hot day.

The next thing I know, it’s lying in a disjointed lump on the cedar chips covering the base of the cage.

I flinch at the sight, but Clancy sets a careful hand on my shoulder.

“It’s going to take time. After everything I’ve heard and observed, I think your problem might be how much you’re resisting the urge.”

I stare at him, barely holding back a glower. “Isn’t the point to resist?”

“Then you’re fighting against yourself. You’ll only make yourself weaker.

” Clancy tips his head thoughtfully. “What if you focused on how you will get what the power wants? Stretching out the pain so you can absorb more of it—and then you’ll have more time to pull back as well.

Even holding a creature in place with the sense of something horrible to come is a pretty painful act, if you think about it. ”

I wet my lips and look at the dead mouse again. I don’t know if what he’s saying makes sense, but it’s true that my past attempts at control haven’t gotten me very far.

I’ve managed to get more specific in who I target, but how… not really at all.

Gritting my teeth, I brace myself to try.

The second mouse I don’t kill outright, yanking myself out of the scream’s trance at the last second. But its mangled twitching showed there’d be no point in keeping it alive if Clancy couldn’t scoop it out and pass it to another guardian, telling him to take it to Dominic.

I still feel sick, but knowing I managed to rein myself in a little builds my confidence. With the third mouse, I encourage the demanding need inside me to inflict the pain slowly, drawing out every drop.

One bone snaps. A sliver of flesh rips.

I slam my mouth shut, and the mouse shudders. It’s going to need healing too, but it can still walk.

A startled laugh of relief tumbles from my mouth, soothing the vocal cords still quivering from my last shriek.

The next time, I don’t break anything at all.

I narrow all my attention onto the panic I can sense in the rodents’ beady eyes, the twitches of their bodies as my scream grips them, drinking in the thinner stream formed by the torment of that fear—and pull back before the scream can slice any deeper.

I practice again and again, until I’ve probably given the poor things PTSD. But I haven’t done anything worse to them.

Finally, I sag back on my heels and realize that my shirt is damp with sweat.

Clancy’s small smile looks almost friendly to me now. “That was good. Very good. You’ll have a chance to practice more later. Better not to push yourself too hard all at once.”

I find myself accepting his offered hand to help me to my feet. A whisper of elation tickles through me as we return to the main clearing.

He told the truth about at least this much—he’s giving me the chance to be something other than a monster.

When I rejoin the others, Dominic still has his harness on.

The straps of the shrub-carrier have been constructed well to work around his various appendages, angling under his tentacles and then across the outer part of his shoulders.

Another strap around his waist holds the contraption steady, with the pot right in the middle of his back.

“It’s not too bad,” he tells me with a crooked smile. “I’m going to leave it on for the trek back to the facility just to get more used to it.”

Jacob rolls his shoulders, his expression impassive. I can’t tell if he’s been affected by the mock-killing he’s been practicing.

“What now?” he asks Clancy.

Our captor-slash-trainer has brought out a tablet. “We’ll go over more of the details of the mission back at the facility this evening. But I want you to start absorbing the key faces now so you’re most likely to recognize them later.”

He brings up a photograph of a man who looks to be in his sixties, grizzled with slicked back gray hair and lips that are both full and sharply carved in his craggy face.

“This is the leader of a child abduction ring that’s been operating for decades.

His people kidnap vulnerable kids and teens and sell them off into work-slavery or worse. ”

A shiver of revulsion passes through me. “And there aren’t any police or whatever who can stop them?”

Clancy grimaces. “He pays off local law enforcement and operates very carefully so there’s as little evidence as possible. I think it’s time someone took matters into their own hands.”

He flips through several more photographs, pausing on each to give us time to study their faces. “These are his known associates that we’ve identified. Most of them should be with him in his home on the night we send you in.”

“What about the kids?” Dominic asks, frowning.

“They never have more than one or two on their property at a time, and never for very long. And from what we can tell, they don’t keep them at the private home. But to take every precaution, we’ll pick a time when we’re sure they’re between transactions.”

Clancy lowers the tablet and considers us. “There may be household staff on the premises. We’d prefer you didn’t harm them if you can avoid it. I’d imagine you can differentiate between them and your real targets by their behavior and clothing.”

One more factor to pay attention to. I won’t be able to simply scream at the house and carve up every human being inside it.

This assignment isn’t going to be easy . It isn’t anything like our past missions, where we had no idea what real purpose the guardians had for sending us out.

But the quiver passing through my veins is as much anticipation as it is nerves. I would like the chance to put my deadly skills to use in a way that helps people rather than simply slaughtering those in my way.

And I’m starting to think that might be possible in ways I never imagined before.

How can I say that killing a bunch of child-slavers is a bad thing? These assholes have to know their work is evil, but they’re doing it anyway.

If I was willing to shatter Ursula Engel and her men simply for trying to murder us, slaughtering this bunch should be barely a blip on my conscience. Hell, it’s balancing the scales, making sure people who deserve it have real lives that these pricks would steal from them.

Good fucking riddance.

If we get a better idea of how we could get free again while we’re at it, then it’s an extra win.

I eye Clancy’s tablet as he slips it into his shoulder bag, wondering about the cell reception out here. Would we be able to get our hands on a phone out in the wider world that we could bring back and use?

But who would I contact? I had Rollick’s number programmed into my old phone, but I didn’t memorize it.

And I’m not sure even our supposedly greatest ally can be trusted to have our backs—or to protect us from his fellow shadowkind—after all.

Well, there’s no way to know what we’ll have to work with until we get out there.

Clancy claps his hands together. “Riva and Jacob, why don’t you two run back to the facility. We’ve highlighted the trail with more markers at intervals. Consider it a challenge to see how quickly you can get there ahead of the rest of us.”

The corners of his eyes crinkle as if with amusement. As if he likes watching us rise to the occasion.

I have no idea what to make of this man.

Jacob jerks his head toward me. “Come on, Wildcat. They can eat our dust.”

He springs forward, not waiting for me—but then, he knows I can catch up with him in a matter of seconds. Which I do.

We dash between the trees, noting each orange marker when they flash into view up ahead. I could pull past Jacob and leave him “eating my dust” too, but I only propel myself a few steps ahead of him where I’ll have more room to maneuver.

It’s more fun when I can hear him right behind me. Like it’s a real competition.

And weirdly, for several minutes there, the extended sprint actually does feel almost fun.

The wind whips over my face and braid, the fresh forest air flooding my lungs. Our feet thunder over the ground in a complex joint rhythm that’s close to a song.

We’re not free. I know we’re not.

But for a few moments there, I feel closer to it than I have the whole time we were out of the guardians’ clutches but hunted at every turn.

Jacob called me a superhero after I tore down Engel’s soldiers with my scream. I managed to believe I was acting like one while we broke those six kids out of the facility days ago, even if that went all wrong.

Could what Clancy’s offering us really be our best chance at becoming some kind of heroes for real?

I spot streaks of brighter sunlight in the distance where I think the forest gives way to the main field around the mountainside. I push myself a little faster, our goal in reach?—

And stumble at the sight of the guy I thought was behind me emerging from between the trees in front of me instead.

It’s not Jacob, though. Jacob slows next to me as my run peters out into a hesitant jog.

The guy who’s ambling through the woods, now heading our way after seeing us, is his twin.

I haven’t seen Griffin, let alone spoken to him, since my first day in the facility. From Jacob’s tensing and the whiff of startled pheromones he gives off, I suspect he hasn’t had much chance to reacquaint himself with his brother either.

Griffin offers us a mild smile. “Back from training?” he says in that vaguely friendly way that feels as vacant as his gaze.

I don’t know how to talk to him anymore. Is that awful, when I’ve spent years wishing I had him back?

“Yeah.” I come to a stop a few feet away, not sure whether I should keep going, what else he might want to talk about.

Then Jacob barrels between us, his muscles and his voice taut. “You helped Clancy get his hands on us, Griffin? What the fuck were you thinking?”

Oh, shit. I forgot that Jacob hadn’t realized that part until I told him yesterday morning.

Griffin blinks at his twin, but even his surprise at the outburst is mild. “It seemed like the best thing to do. The right thing to do.”

“To see us stuck back in cages? What’s the matter with you?”

Griffin’s gaze veers around us. “This isn’t much of a cage.”

I think his calm demeanor is pissing Jacob off even more than he already was. “It doesn’t matter how pretty it is—we’re still trapped here. Partly because of you . You’re one of us. Or at least you were.”

Griffin studies Jake as if he’s a little confused by the entire line of questioning. “I didn’t want to see you get into even more trouble or do more things you might regret. I’m sorry that I had to trick you to do it.”

“You’re sorry?” Jacob rasps. “You betrayed all of us. Me. Riva. You loved her—I know you did—and you helped them drag her back— How could you turn on even her ?”

A flicker of something passes through Griffin’s expression, there and then gone before I can tell if it’s anything resembling an emotion. His attention slides to me where I’m standing behind his brother’s shoulder, and a pang shoots through my chest.

I loved him too. I don’t know if there’s anything left of the guy I loved behind those dazed eyes.

“I think I should give you more space,” Griffin says, backing up a step. “Seeing me is getting you worked up. I hope we can talk more later.”

“You—”

Jacob’s hand twitches, and I grab his arm before he can lift it. I don’t want him using his powers on his brother—I can’t imagine he won’t regret that .

“Let him go,” I say quietly as Griffin strides off toward the clearing. “I don’t think he can give us any answer we’d be happy with.”

Jake’s fingers flex and clench at his sides. “There’s nothing okay about that.”

“I know. It isn’t okay at all. But yelling at him isn’t going to fix it. Throwing around your power definitely won’t.”

Jacob lets his breath out in a hiss. His head droops. “Yeah.”

Watching him, an ache expands through my chest, eating away all the momentary joy I found. I can remember the two of them together so easily, back when we were all in the facility together.

Any time Griffin faltered in a physical trial, Jacob would be there, ensuring his twin made it through. Every time Jacob’s determined incisiveness boiled over into frustration, Griffin would be there, talking him down.

They fit together perfectly, like two halves of a whole, made to complement each other—to balance each other out. I’ve never seen them argue.

Until now.

We stay there for a few minutes, just standing together as Jake’s breaths even out. I figure it’s better not to push him to go on to the facility until he’s got his anger totally under control.

Just as he finally lifts his head, footsteps crackle behind us. We look over to see Clancy approaching us.

Apparently our captor is a fast walker.

He takes us in with a slight cock of his head that asks a question silently.

“We bumped into Griffin,” I say in explanation. “It wasn’t a good conversation.”

“Ah.” Clancy’s mouth tightens.

I cross my arms over my chest, just shy of hugging myself. “What did the guardians do to him?”

Clancy takes a deep breath, his gaze sliding past us toward the mountainside and then back again. “It’s over now. I’d focus on that.”

Jacob’s voice comes out in a growl. “But?—”

The older man cuts him off with a shake of his head and fishes for something in his bag.

“I realized there’s one thing I wanted to go over with you upfront.

While you’re out on the assignment, we’ll be tracking and monitoring your life signals the entire time.

To make sure you haven’t gotten diverted, and so we can alert Dominic right away if his powers are needed. ”

My spine stiffens. “What do you mean?”

He pulls out a couple of metal bands about as thick as my thumb. “You’ll each be wearing one of these around an ankle. So you’ll never really be alone.”